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The Battle Rages On

Take a step forward. Wind up having several steps back. At least that is the way it seems at times, especially when it comes to Michelle's health issues.

This has been another week of ups and downs for her, in regards to her health. One moment she is doing well (or relatively speaking), the next she is in bed, sick.

Thursday, she pushed herself a little too hard, and wound up sleeping all afternoon and night. I had the day off from work on Friday, and we went to lunch and saw Narnia. She was miserable during the movie, and even left a couple times to go to the bathroom, one time to throw up. She was in bed the rest of the day, and is still in bed now.

I wish I knew what to do. I pray for her healing all the time, and I try to encourage her to look to the Lord. She struggles with that, because she is always sick. It tears me apart seeing her sleeping all the time, complaining about being sick. I try to encourage her to try to find the good in the midst of the bad, and praise the Lord for the good things. At times, I feel like I've failed her, like I've let her down. Not from the physical aspect, but from the mental/spiritual aspect.

I know that I'm just being too hard on myself. Although, at the same time, I know there were areas I could have done better in, and there are other areas where I am trying to do better. At times, though, it almost feels like it is too late. I just trust in God to get us both through this mess.

I continue forward with the Lord, with work, with my forum, and with Christian Forums. I trust that the Lord will carry us through. I just pray that things will change for Michelle, for the better, so that she might be able to enjoy life, despite the circumstances she may find herself in.