this prolly has been the suckiest week i've had since...forever. i lost my best friend and it pretty much sucks. we've been best friends since like 3rd grade and we've been through it all together. and every single family thing i go through...she's been there. and every single family crap thing she goes through...i'm there. we use to be inseperable but that changed like 3 years ago when she started hanging out with other people and not making the greatest decisions and then...we both grew up a lot and she needed a friend and i've always been there and i helped her. and we've been getting a lot closer and talking a lot more....well she has been doing the talking and i've been listening. and i'll defend her to anybody. i dont care who it is. this girl says crap about my friend all the time and i'm ready to punch the girl in the face and she pretty much knows it too and then she's all like 'i'm sorry i'm jealous blah blah blah' and i'm like 'blah blah blah' i really hate stupid drama crap.
and then something else happened this week and its pretty much guna be a sucky month till october is over then....hopefully it'll be better and if not, well my life is guna be sucky for awhile..oh well i guess.
and i'm also insecure about a lot of crap and it really bothers me too. i dont talk to people about it cuz i dont find any reason to. i hate talking about stuff and i know thats not good. i'm just bad when it comes to words n stuff. and yea i know its not an excuse but yea..i wish i was different in a lot of ways. i wish i didn't screw up as much as i do. and i know i screw up a lot too. my brother always tells me what i'm doing wrong and i know he doesn't always mean it in a jerkish way...i just hate it when people remind me of when i screw up.
and my friend also lied to me today too. its not really my business about what i asked her but she still didn't need to lie. and i hope she gets an unwanted result from what she did too. and the guy...well i pretty much hope he gets screwed over too even though i'm pretty sure it was her idea and not his. she just needs to get over her little desire from guys and she needs to stop making excuses for herself cuz she does it and then she whines about it and then does it again....
i GRRR at life.
and then something else happened this week and its pretty much guna be a sucky month till october is over then....hopefully it'll be better and if not, well my life is guna be sucky for awhile..oh well i guess.
and i'm also insecure about a lot of crap and it really bothers me too. i dont talk to people about it cuz i dont find any reason to. i hate talking about stuff and i know thats not good. i'm just bad when it comes to words n stuff. and yea i know its not an excuse but yea..i wish i was different in a lot of ways. i wish i didn't screw up as much as i do. and i know i screw up a lot too. my brother always tells me what i'm doing wrong and i know he doesn't always mean it in a jerkish way...i just hate it when people remind me of when i screw up.
and my friend also lied to me today too. its not really my business about what i asked her but she still didn't need to lie. and i hope she gets an unwanted result from what she did too. and the guy...well i pretty much hope he gets screwed over too even though i'm pretty sure it was her idea and not his. she just needs to get over her little desire from guys and she needs to stop making excuses for herself cuz she does it and then she whines about it and then does it again....
i GRRR at life.
