It's the spiritual lows to where I feel as though I am starting to drift away, that maybe I just should care cause things are too much. I doubt my self worth to my friends, to myself and to my Creator.
Yesterday, out of curiosity, I visited the church I was a part of when I was younger. I watched this church grow from a double-wide trailer to an actual church building, it's growth in members, youth and it's growth in hypocrisy and stagnation. Now that I have transportation, I was lead to see what had become of this church that I used to run away to. The sermon was lead by someone other than the preacher I knew, and it was soon apparent that Tom had been fighting illness for months. He had contracted malaria while on a mission trip to Africa 4 years ago and now fights his fourth battle with viral meningitis. It was important that I was there this week in order to know that this was going on and to be able to get back in touch with Tom. It was also important for me to be there this past Sunday to show me something else. I figured that the church would be about dead, though I was surprised to see a lot of folks that I knew back then still within the church, with their new families and that the sermon was about growth within the church and to have a child-like faith for Christ. It was focused around Matthew 18: 2-4. I was pleasantly surprised to hear that this church was trying to grow, that they were combating the stagnate nature within the church, just like the issues at the church I belong to, 1st Christian.
If as a christian, we must die daily to ourselves and be filled more with God and less of ourselves, then we must think this same way of the church if we expect it to grow, and draw closer to Christ. The church is the body of Christ and is made up of people that should be dying daily, and if this body, this church dies to itself, it will become what God desires it to be. I pray daily that I die to the world and to the ways I used to live, I also pray that God uses me as a vessel and that when others look upon me, that it isn't me they see, but God and His works. I wish more would follow through with their devotion to Christ, walk the walk and stop saying that they are Christian. It is discouraging to see friends that believe in Christ, but booze it up on thursday nights, lust daily and condemn and judge with the same tongue that they sing hymns to praise God Almighty on Sunday. I don't consider myself a Sunday Christian, I am a Tuesday Christian and also one on Thursday. I am not saying that I am better, because I still sin daily, I just see what God has given me and I want to please Him in my actions, and for me, the actions they are making would not be pleasing for me to do in His eyes. I would feel complete shame. I want to grow in a stronger, more mature relationship with Christ, and it breaks my heart to know that these that I call friends, don't.
I guess I said what I had to say and penned out some thoughts that were of my heart and mind. I want to encourage anyone that feels hindered by friends to just step out to Christ, because it doesn't matter what your friends think about your relationship with Christ, because it is Jesus that is your salvation, not them. Don't let them be your deciding factor as to whether or not you grow closer with God or if you follow their lead.
One last thing I wanted to share that spoke to me this afternoon, was the verse that my devotion was based from. It spoke out so much to me, that I truly can not put into words what it says to me, at least not yet. I just want these words to sink in more and more.
1 Corinthians 15:3-8 (New Living Translation)
3 I passed on to you what was most important and what had also been passed on to me--that Christ died for our sins, just as the Scriptures said. 4 He was buried, and he was raised from the dead on the third day, as the Scriptures said. 5 He was seen by Peter and then by the twelve apostles. 6 After that, he was seen by more than five hundred of his followers at one time, most of whom are still alive, though some have died by now. 7 Then he was seen by James and later by all the apostles. 8 Last of all, I saw him, too, long after the others, as though I had been born at the wrong time.
Yesterday, out of curiosity, I visited the church I was a part of when I was younger. I watched this church grow from a double-wide trailer to an actual church building, it's growth in members, youth and it's growth in hypocrisy and stagnation. Now that I have transportation, I was lead to see what had become of this church that I used to run away to. The sermon was lead by someone other than the preacher I knew, and it was soon apparent that Tom had been fighting illness for months. He had contracted malaria while on a mission trip to Africa 4 years ago and now fights his fourth battle with viral meningitis. It was important that I was there this week in order to know that this was going on and to be able to get back in touch with Tom. It was also important for me to be there this past Sunday to show me something else. I figured that the church would be about dead, though I was surprised to see a lot of folks that I knew back then still within the church, with their new families and that the sermon was about growth within the church and to have a child-like faith for Christ. It was focused around Matthew 18: 2-4. I was pleasantly surprised to hear that this church was trying to grow, that they were combating the stagnate nature within the church, just like the issues at the church I belong to, 1st Christian.
If as a christian, we must die daily to ourselves and be filled more with God and less of ourselves, then we must think this same way of the church if we expect it to grow, and draw closer to Christ. The church is the body of Christ and is made up of people that should be dying daily, and if this body, this church dies to itself, it will become what God desires it to be. I pray daily that I die to the world and to the ways I used to live, I also pray that God uses me as a vessel and that when others look upon me, that it isn't me they see, but God and His works. I wish more would follow through with their devotion to Christ, walk the walk and stop saying that they are Christian. It is discouraging to see friends that believe in Christ, but booze it up on thursday nights, lust daily and condemn and judge with the same tongue that they sing hymns to praise God Almighty on Sunday. I don't consider myself a Sunday Christian, I am a Tuesday Christian and also one on Thursday. I am not saying that I am better, because I still sin daily, I just see what God has given me and I want to please Him in my actions, and for me, the actions they are making would not be pleasing for me to do in His eyes. I would feel complete shame. I want to grow in a stronger, more mature relationship with Christ, and it breaks my heart to know that these that I call friends, don't.
I guess I said what I had to say and penned out some thoughts that were of my heart and mind. I want to encourage anyone that feels hindered by friends to just step out to Christ, because it doesn't matter what your friends think about your relationship with Christ, because it is Jesus that is your salvation, not them. Don't let them be your deciding factor as to whether or not you grow closer with God or if you follow their lead.
One last thing I wanted to share that spoke to me this afternoon, was the verse that my devotion was based from. It spoke out so much to me, that I truly can not put into words what it says to me, at least not yet. I just want these words to sink in more and more.
1 Corinthians 15:3-8 (New Living Translation)
3 I passed on to you what was most important and what had also been passed on to me--that Christ died for our sins, just as the Scriptures said. 4 He was buried, and he was raised from the dead on the third day, as the Scriptures said. 5 He was seen by Peter and then by the twelve apostles. 6 After that, he was seen by more than five hundred of his followers at one time, most of whom are still alive, though some have died by now. 7 Then he was seen by James and later by all the apostles. 8 Last of all, I saw him, too, long after the others, as though I had been born at the wrong time.
