I'm so tired that I should just go to bed right now. Yet, I will refrain for a couple more hours so that I can actually stay asleep the entire night (that is my hope anyway). I feel like my bronchitis has cleared up some, but this evening I just feel sick again-congested. I have now been sick since the middle of the last week of last month. This is the longest that I have ever been sick for; not sure why it is hanging on for so long.
No school...so why so tired? I just got off a 32 hour shift that began this past Friday and ended today. Besides getting some time to sleep, I have been working. Just short of a 40 hour work week in 3 days. This is always my hardest weekend of the month with my job. To make things worse, I start back in tomorrow morning through Friday.
I have volunteered to monitor at the school that is a part of my organization for this week so that I can get my evenings free. I am not sure how that will turn out as they usually don't do a very good job of disciplining and let the teens run wild...and that is not acceptable to me. So, we shall see if I can bear the stress of wild teens that have no rules. If no, I may not do this all week. If I can handle it then I will volunteer next week as well, just so that I can get my evenings free for awhile. I'll have to see how it goes!
So when I got home I was laying on my bed, relaxing, looking out my bedroom window at the near-bare trees, thinking. It was nice to sit back for a moment and rest my "weary" head. Started me thinking. Seasons of the year, like seasons of our life.
We sometimes want to rush the seasons of our life, sometimes so in a hurry to get to the next stage that we are sure will be better than the one that we are in. Single people want someone. Some married people want out. To learn to be content!
The older I get the more content I get in the stage that God has put me at. Being single is not the burden as it once was. Do I want to find mr. right? Absolutely! But not in desparation. I would rather wait on God. Yes, I wish it would be sooner than later, but I'm not rushing. God knows what I need, He knows the growth that I must still go through.
This is just a season of my life. If we can't be content now...then when? When we think we have what we want? You know that old saying about the grass being greener on the other side....? Yeah. That one. I think the grass is green on this side too if we put the work into keeping it that way!
Sure, I get impatient at times just like everyone else. I sure do. I'm open to where God leads. And that's the difference now-I really want what He wants for me. It didn't always used to be so clear cut for me. I just wanted what I wanted. That sure did get me in a lot of trouble! These days, I try my best to seek God first; patience is something that I am working on.
There is a time for everything. Maybe it's not the time that we want, but life isn't really about us. Not if we are Christians striving towards the goal. How I want to be able to just rest in the arms of a loving, caring God who knows what is best for me!
I must say that I am pretty content today. Yeah, work was tough. It was a long weekend. Working with boys that aren't getting along isn't easy as pie-way more complications! And yet, I feel content. I feel peace. Not everything is "all in order" in my life. Not everything adds up. Yet, I feel content despite my circumstances. When I am able to do this it is because I am more focused on God than on myself. How I wish I could always be in that place!
So that's where I am at right now. Just learning and living and trusting in the One who knows my life from start to finish. Life isn't easy and it's far from perfect but as I reach towards God, I find everything that I need. I fall every day-fail to trust, fail to always get it right...I'm a work in progress.
No matter what, I am confident though that God loves me and that He is right there with me-always with me.
"For I am convinced that neither death nor life, nor angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Jesus Christ our Lord (Romans 8:38)."
No school...so why so tired? I just got off a 32 hour shift that began this past Friday and ended today. Besides getting some time to sleep, I have been working. Just short of a 40 hour work week in 3 days. This is always my hardest weekend of the month with my job. To make things worse, I start back in tomorrow morning through Friday.
I have volunteered to monitor at the school that is a part of my organization for this week so that I can get my evenings free. I am not sure how that will turn out as they usually don't do a very good job of disciplining and let the teens run wild...and that is not acceptable to me. So, we shall see if I can bear the stress of wild teens that have no rules. If no, I may not do this all week. If I can handle it then I will volunteer next week as well, just so that I can get my evenings free for awhile. I'll have to see how it goes!
So when I got home I was laying on my bed, relaxing, looking out my bedroom window at the near-bare trees, thinking. It was nice to sit back for a moment and rest my "weary" head. Started me thinking. Seasons of the year, like seasons of our life.
We sometimes want to rush the seasons of our life, sometimes so in a hurry to get to the next stage that we are sure will be better than the one that we are in. Single people want someone. Some married people want out. To learn to be content!
The older I get the more content I get in the stage that God has put me at. Being single is not the burden as it once was. Do I want to find mr. right? Absolutely! But not in desparation. I would rather wait on God. Yes, I wish it would be sooner than later, but I'm not rushing. God knows what I need, He knows the growth that I must still go through.
This is just a season of my life. If we can't be content now...then when? When we think we have what we want? You know that old saying about the grass being greener on the other side....? Yeah. That one. I think the grass is green on this side too if we put the work into keeping it that way!
Sure, I get impatient at times just like everyone else. I sure do. I'm open to where God leads. And that's the difference now-I really want what He wants for me. It didn't always used to be so clear cut for me. I just wanted what I wanted. That sure did get me in a lot of trouble! These days, I try my best to seek God first; patience is something that I am working on.
There is a time for everything. Maybe it's not the time that we want, but life isn't really about us. Not if we are Christians striving towards the goal. How I want to be able to just rest in the arms of a loving, caring God who knows what is best for me!
I must say that I am pretty content today. Yeah, work was tough. It was a long weekend. Working with boys that aren't getting along isn't easy as pie-way more complications! And yet, I feel content. I feel peace. Not everything is "all in order" in my life. Not everything adds up. Yet, I feel content despite my circumstances. When I am able to do this it is because I am more focused on God than on myself. How I wish I could always be in that place!
So that's where I am at right now. Just learning and living and trusting in the One who knows my life from start to finish. Life isn't easy and it's far from perfect but as I reach towards God, I find everything that I need. I fall every day-fail to trust, fail to always get it right...I'm a work in progress.
No matter what, I am confident though that God loves me and that He is right there with me-always with me.
"For I am convinced that neither death nor life, nor angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Jesus Christ our Lord (Romans 8:38)."
