Paths Ahead (June 30, 2005)

So I did the deed yesterday and told Patrick that I could no longer continue with Big Yellow Mama and that I had to follow the path God has for me. So I am now searching to start a band in the same vein as BYM, but completely Christian and glorifying God. When I think about doing this and using as music ministry, I get excited and worked up just thinking about who I am doing this for. But then there are times of doubt, and I know where that is coming from, and I will not allow that. God has given me a passion to play music and a talent, and I desire to do it in His name. In other news, my breathing sucks and I pray that I don'thave to make a trip to the ER tonight. I woke this morning at 7am forcing myself to breathe, forcing air to move out of my lungs. I get so scared when that happens because it is such a struggle and I'm not sure if I'll be able to take that next breath. I have to get a new inhaler today, because my old one is about to run out and by doing this, which is important, I will be using the last of my money that was to last me for the 2 week period I am out of work. Just pray for me and I know in my heart God will provide, He always has and always will. It's just my weakness and lack of true faith that cause me to worry.