So the past couple months has been the worst time of my life, and if you knew my life you'd thats saying a LOT. I had just found out i was pregnant, and worked up the courage to tell my entire Family, and my boyfriends. They're all excited and buying stuff and supporting us every step of the way.
Sam was super scared and really not ready for everything but as each day went by i watched him get a little bit more and more excited about the thought that he was going to be a dad. What really won him over is when we were talking about the sex of the baby and he told me all the reasons he wanted a little girl, it was soo cute and i told him that if we have a little baby girl, he could name her. it didn't take long for him to come up with Zoe Rae Smith. After that he was hooked on the idea and just couldn't wait until April 10th (the due date)
After a month or so i started bleeding and getting really worried, and after weeks of doctors visits and multiple blood tests, we found that our baby has past, and we both kinda just shut down. I cried for days and Sam just stopped talking. we hid away for a little while trying to figure out what we were going to do. And now we're still not sure.
as our lifes slowly go back to normal we both still feel like something is missing, like we climbed a mountain, reached the top just to find it was the wrong mountain. We don't know if thats Gods way of telling us to wait to become parents, or if we should try again. We both want this baby, we know that but it seems a little odd to try for a baby at this age.
I feel Empty without her with me, and i know Sam feels the same way. but its getting harder to take this one day at a time when we can't decide where to go from here.
Sam was super scared and really not ready for everything but as each day went by i watched him get a little bit more and more excited about the thought that he was going to be a dad. What really won him over is when we were talking about the sex of the baby and he told me all the reasons he wanted a little girl, it was soo cute and i told him that if we have a little baby girl, he could name her. it didn't take long for him to come up with Zoe Rae Smith. After that he was hooked on the idea and just couldn't wait until April 10th (the due date)
After a month or so i started bleeding and getting really worried, and after weeks of doctors visits and multiple blood tests, we found that our baby has past, and we both kinda just shut down. I cried for days and Sam just stopped talking. we hid away for a little while trying to figure out what we were going to do. And now we're still not sure.
as our lifes slowly go back to normal we both still feel like something is missing, like we climbed a mountain, reached the top just to find it was the wrong mountain. We don't know if thats Gods way of telling us to wait to become parents, or if we should try again. We both want this baby, we know that but it seems a little odd to try for a baby at this age.
I feel Empty without her with me, and i know Sam feels the same way. but its getting harder to take this one day at a time when we can't decide where to go from here.
