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Notes on Legalism, Toxic Soteriology, Unbelief & Mind Control Programming

Just now had a sudden mental flash or "epiphany" grasping the nature of legalism and why it bes so wrong.

Concerning toxic soteriologies based in legalism, the reason for them bes that people bes trying to mind control themselves. They want to slam something once and for all into their heads so that they do not have to worry about stumbling ever again. This might sound like a good thing but it bes not. For starters, the struggles we have, the things we stumble at, bes meant to keep us in dynamic, living, breathing, continual fellowship with God and Christ through the Holy Spirit. To keep us dependent on Him and close to Him and always reaching out for Him. To want to cement oneself in self-forged righteousness constitutes an effort to make the dynamic static, and thus to avoid the messy but organic ongoing, growing relationship with God in favor of a conveniently "righteous" way to keep Him at arms' length by "pleasing and appeasing". If we could make ourselves never mess up then we'd never have to do all that icky uncomfortable stuff about examining ourselves, searching our hearts, seeing our sin, feeling the nastiness of it, seeing the ugliness of it, tasting the bitter sting of shame over it. We seek to avoid shame at all costs, it being the most heinous and abhorrent of all human emotions, so we seek to cement and nail down a program in our minds that will act as a deterrant, as an agent of aversion, as a permanent recoil from sin. But in doing so we attempt to violate our own earthly natures -- our carnal minds LOVE sin and RUN to sin -- and thus doom ourselves to failure in those efforts. We simply cannot save ourselves, no matter how hard we try. And boy, do legalistic toxic soteriologies TRY!!!

Legalism and toxic soteriology constitute an attempt at mind control, at somehow programming the brain or "cementing" into it once and for all to never again do something. The toxic soteriological dynamic exists as a formula for psycho-emotional self-flagellation, essentially. But the key here would be the meaning and purpose of punishment in this context.
Retribution:
(paying for the sin by suffering)
The effort exists not merely as one to exact retribution FROM oneself (thus cheating and counterfeiting in comparison to Christ's sacrifice on the Cross which sheds blood and exacts suffering from Him to pay those penalties -- thus revealing the retributivve aspect of self-flagellation as consisting in UNBELIEF and Cain's fruit basket) --
Transformation: (alteration of one's essential nature)
but also as one in which to cement something into the mind, in other words, to act as one's own agent of self-transformation. But since scripture states that the goodness of God leads us to repentance and that by beholding we become changed and that faith comes by hearing and hearing by the word of God, and all the promises regarding a new heart and new spirit which results in obedience come FROM God and indicate GOD HIMSELF as the active agent of transformation, then self-flagellating toxic soteriologies also constitute an attempt to effect this transformation oneself instead of trusting God in FAITH (not sight) to work it as He has promised. So this, too, partakes of UNBELIEF and Cain's fruit basket, along with the added component of putting oneself in the place of God as the agent of transformation. Come to think of it the retributive element reflects this attempt to put oneself in the place of God also, by being the one to suffer and from whom to exact a price of suffering to somehow "make up for" or "atone" for one's sins, as a means of attempting to catalyze and precipitate the transformation!!!!

Sorry about the sloppy and convoluted writing. Moriah bes "onto something BIG" here and can only at this stage hammer it out feverishly to get it down. Oh merciful holy true and living God TEACH Moriah, teach Your wretched feral creature who clings writhing to You in chains from them denizens of the Abyss. It wants You and it wants freedom; please show it the way as only You can, oh precious beautiful saviour what works this miracle and makes it desire freedom and beg You for it. Yes it begs You, it does not care how wretched and depraved it seems to them humans, it bes desperate wanting You.

Give it wisdom Lord, please give it understanding that it bes no more a fool who walks in darkness worshiping the devil and imbibing his lies. It wants OUT Lord, out for good, please.