Is It OK to Go on≥..
My life is changing. Im working on healing, actually digging in, opening, or looking to open trap doors. Thus the doors are unlocking, or Im looking to try a new tool or find new tools, be committed to finding new tools. Being aware that I don't want new tools, I want the past, I don't want to dig in the present for an unbalanced future. Part of me wants to stay in the past. Stay in denial. A lot of what I work on is exercise work for Preliminary bending. Im trying to turn stone into clay then water. Im stone, I need to be clay before I can be workable. Its humiliating. I wont tell anyone about this. What about my image of greatness and the fact that I know all things. What will I do if my subjects find out.. What!, they already know!. I will have to wear a grocery bag over my face for the rest of my life.
Im hurting. I have to go into myself , or do things with out triggering the pain.
God is with me and running this deal.
Im on the defensive, the world doesn't like me because I don't worship it or like it. Those fakes and liars that talk but don't back anything up get exposed when Im around. Its just my presence. I think they are getting tired of me and want to Shish Kebab ...me.
I have to be willing to let go and let God. I have to be willing for change, for new people places and things.
My life is changing. Im working on healing, actually digging in, opening, or looking to open trap doors. Thus the doors are unlocking, or Im looking to try a new tool or find new tools, be committed to finding new tools. Being aware that I don't want new tools, I want the past, I don't want to dig in the present for an unbalanced future. Part of me wants to stay in the past. Stay in denial. A lot of what I work on is exercise work for Preliminary bending. Im trying to turn stone into clay then water. Im stone, I need to be clay before I can be workable. Its humiliating. I wont tell anyone about this. What about my image of greatness and the fact that I know all things. What will I do if my subjects find out.. What!, they already know!. I will have to wear a grocery bag over my face for the rest of my life.
Im hurting. I have to go into myself , or do things with out triggering the pain.
God is with me and running this deal.
Im on the defensive, the world doesn't like me because I don't worship it or like it. Those fakes and liars that talk but don't back anything up get exposed when Im around. Its just my presence. I think they are getting tired of me and want to Shish Kebab ...me.
I have to be willing to let go and let God. I have to be willing for change, for new people places and things.
