Today is the first day where i started to feel genuine happiness. i suffer from anxiety and depression. the majority of my days are happy, but its the wanting to feel the happy emotion, instead of the usual tense and uneasiness. its very hard for me to make friendships and develop them. im a very social person in an anti social way. and what i mean like that is i make dumb conversations with people, usually i make them laugh then thats it. i dont like going further. but i cannot be alone. God wants me to share my light and become a better christian. Recently He has given me a new life through Jesus. Its so hard understanding christianity, but its starting to really click now. i have goals i want to work on. my first and main goal in life is to Seek God, live by Christs example, know my bible and realize I am a child of God and His spirit dwells within me.
so other than that these are my goals
1. put myself first
2. develop new coping skills with my anxiety and depression
3. connect the dots and try to understand why i think the way i do
4. become a better verison of myself by being happy, supportive, caring like i know i can be
5. be the friend to other people like i know i can be.
my prayer for the day:
God, my whole life this has been a struggle, but i believe with the help of your grace you are going to send the right people in to help me so i can help others. you have given me a strong, caring heart and i thank you so much. my name means worthy of love. i want to love you then myself. God i believe you are going to transform me into something i cant even imagine. you have given me my life the way it was for a reason, and i may not understand it now, but i have faith in you heavely father. Be with me, help me with my cross, carry my burdens since your yoke is light. God i need you now more than ever. I come to you with the most broken my heart has ever been. Fix me God with your love and grace. Help me to appreciate you, my life, the gifts you have given me. Help me to focus on the positive. You have given us a perfect example through Jesus Christ who is my personal hero and savior. I believe through your will I am going to get better. I will be this person I see in my head. Im sorry for all the times Ive hurt you, ive hurt myself and i hurt others. God grant me peace, strengh, wisdom, and to let me just love. I believe this is the time where you are going to totally change my life. In Jesus I pray, believe and love
-amen-
so other than that these are my goals
1. put myself first
2. develop new coping skills with my anxiety and depression
3. connect the dots and try to understand why i think the way i do
4. become a better verison of myself by being happy, supportive, caring like i know i can be
5. be the friend to other people like i know i can be.
my prayer for the day:
God, my whole life this has been a struggle, but i believe with the help of your grace you are going to send the right people in to help me so i can help others. you have given me a strong, caring heart and i thank you so much. my name means worthy of love. i want to love you then myself. God i believe you are going to transform me into something i cant even imagine. you have given me my life the way it was for a reason, and i may not understand it now, but i have faith in you heavely father. Be with me, help me with my cross, carry my burdens since your yoke is light. God i need you now more than ever. I come to you with the most broken my heart has ever been. Fix me God with your love and grace. Help me to appreciate you, my life, the gifts you have given me. Help me to focus on the positive. You have given us a perfect example through Jesus Christ who is my personal hero and savior. I believe through your will I am going to get better. I will be this person I see in my head. Im sorry for all the times Ive hurt you, ive hurt myself and i hurt others. God grant me peace, strengh, wisdom, and to let me just love. I believe this is the time where you are going to totally change my life. In Jesus I pray, believe and love
-amen-