Cruddy
Discontent
Unhappy
miserable
Angry
upset
not happy at ALL
restless
All of these things and more... I am not sure what I am supposed to be doing, where I am heading...God seems so very very distant from me right now. It feels like He is mad at me. I am not happy being a homemaker, in times past this has been a source of great joy to me. I can't stand my family. My kids are on my nerves, they are fighting with each other... my husband... oh...my husband is liying to me again...and i caught him at it...and he kept on lying about the situation trying to cover his behind...and he used ME as his EXCUSE for doing the bad things he did!!!!
He keeps misspending his money I gvie him for gas...then has no money to get to work on... I caught him in a lie, then another then YET ANOTHER LIE and he still persisted in LYING TO ME about where the money went. When he couldn't lie anymore to cover his behind, then he came clean. He fiddle farted it away on things that were not important. $200 of gas money for TWO WEEKS...
I can't live with a liar...he has a HISTORY of lying to me...
he has some very admireable traits, he is a super father, a hard worker... but he lies... and his lying/bad decision making has lead to legal problems in the past.
when do you cut the stings and say enough is enough???? make him move out. I can not support four kids on my own. i know that is not an excuse for allowing his behavior to continue on...how am i supposed to ever trust him again? how do you work through trust issues with the one and only person who is supposed to love, accept you and TELL you everything?
i think i am going to move out. i need to pray on this, over this...through this...
please pray with me.
Aaron has multiple doc appointments 1 hours drive away... a neruo musclar doc, a neurologist, an immuninologist, PT and OT... its overwhelming... then trying to do all those things on my own...financally...*groan* I can do it... but I am not sure my body can hold up to the stress.... again.... i already have heart and kidney and liver problems...
*sigh*
i feel like i am being a whinner. i have alwys been a person in the past that has "pulled herself up by the bootstraps" no matter how dark the situation...and i've been in some seriously BAD situations.
this time it is differnt.
i am older. i have more kids. kids with physical diabilities. kids with mental disabilites...just alot more KIDS. more responsiblities.
I AM JUST WORE OUT
I keep recting over and over agian that the Lord is my strength... but He feels so vvery very far away. I want to be CLOSE to Him. How have I gotten so far away from Him? How do I get BACK to Him?
please pray for us.
Discontent
Unhappy
miserable
Angry
upset
not happy at ALL
restless
All of these things and more... I am not sure what I am supposed to be doing, where I am heading...God seems so very very distant from me right now. It feels like He is mad at me. I am not happy being a homemaker, in times past this has been a source of great joy to me. I can't stand my family. My kids are on my nerves, they are fighting with each other... my husband... oh...my husband is liying to me again...and i caught him at it...and he kept on lying about the situation trying to cover his behind...and he used ME as his EXCUSE for doing the bad things he did!!!!
He keeps misspending his money I gvie him for gas...then has no money to get to work on... I caught him in a lie, then another then YET ANOTHER LIE and he still persisted in LYING TO ME about where the money went. When he couldn't lie anymore to cover his behind, then he came clean. He fiddle farted it away on things that were not important. $200 of gas money for TWO WEEKS...
I can't live with a liar...he has a HISTORY of lying to me...
he has some very admireable traits, he is a super father, a hard worker... but he lies... and his lying/bad decision making has lead to legal problems in the past.
when do you cut the stings and say enough is enough???? make him move out. I can not support four kids on my own. i know that is not an excuse for allowing his behavior to continue on...how am i supposed to ever trust him again? how do you work through trust issues with the one and only person who is supposed to love, accept you and TELL you everything?
i think i am going to move out. i need to pray on this, over this...through this...
please pray with me.
Aaron has multiple doc appointments 1 hours drive away... a neruo musclar doc, a neurologist, an immuninologist, PT and OT... its overwhelming... then trying to do all those things on my own...financally...*groan* I can do it... but I am not sure my body can hold up to the stress.... again.... i already have heart and kidney and liver problems...
*sigh*
i feel like i am being a whinner. i have alwys been a person in the past that has "pulled herself up by the bootstraps" no matter how dark the situation...and i've been in some seriously BAD situations.
this time it is differnt.
i am older. i have more kids. kids with physical diabilities. kids with mental disabilites...just alot more KIDS. more responsiblities.
I AM JUST WORE OUT
I keep recting over and over agian that the Lord is my strength... but He feels so vvery very far away. I want to be CLOSE to Him. How have I gotten so far away from Him? How do I get BACK to Him?
please pray for us.
