to anyone still reading,
hi today is a very bad day in my life. however i will praise God throughout this storm.
first off my Wifes second son has decided to disown her because we dared to move interstate so i could keep working in my chosen field. he has been resitant to the whole move thing from the start but now blames me and says that pretty much i have held a gun to her head and forced her to move. how can someone of 35 yrs be so naive and not understand the strength his own mother has? She is hurting but putting on a brave face about it all. not wanting her younger children to know what this one is doing. nor how badly it affects her. meantime i have to sit quiet and just let it all go. i feel that she is withdrawing from me because of the pain caused by her son. i know it is only a feeling but still.....
next my own daughter tells me today that she really does not want anything more to do with any member of my new family. so i asked her where that leaves me? no answer. should have expected that. apparently her memory of what happened when my now wife and i first met and the subsequent weeks months years is true, and my memory is null and void. cannot even be considered. ok so i guess i have also lost my only blood related child. i cannot let my wife know this at this point in time because one it will look like i am trying to get the focus off her and on to me, two it will hurt her even more to know that my only flesh child is walking away. she has three others who are not mine.
four her step daughters from a previous marriage are also rejecting her, so there is pain all around.
i am afraid that i am not handling it very well. i keep asking God for pain relief, but it not happen. pain just keep coming, rolling adding hurt upon hurt, each hour presents a new wave of disappointment distress pain hurt. it all looks so bleak. the colours of my world are dulling down. that means depression is not far away.
Help me Oh God. i cannot help her. i cannot change what has been. i cannot alter what other people feel or think about me and my wife. it hurts to be so rejected by people to whom you have loved as best as a hurting person knows how.
to my daughter i offer no excuses, i did what i did, i believed it to be for the best, if it wasnt then i apologise and ask forgiveness. but she doesnt hear that. has been blinded by academia and convinced that her experience ( all the bad ones ) are my fault.
i am dying inside. my only child is rejecting me. please help me Jesus.
hi today is a very bad day in my life. however i will praise God throughout this storm.
first off my Wifes second son has decided to disown her because we dared to move interstate so i could keep working in my chosen field. he has been resitant to the whole move thing from the start but now blames me and says that pretty much i have held a gun to her head and forced her to move. how can someone of 35 yrs be so naive and not understand the strength his own mother has? She is hurting but putting on a brave face about it all. not wanting her younger children to know what this one is doing. nor how badly it affects her. meantime i have to sit quiet and just let it all go. i feel that she is withdrawing from me because of the pain caused by her son. i know it is only a feeling but still.....
next my own daughter tells me today that she really does not want anything more to do with any member of my new family. so i asked her where that leaves me? no answer. should have expected that. apparently her memory of what happened when my now wife and i first met and the subsequent weeks months years is true, and my memory is null and void. cannot even be considered. ok so i guess i have also lost my only blood related child. i cannot let my wife know this at this point in time because one it will look like i am trying to get the focus off her and on to me, two it will hurt her even more to know that my only flesh child is walking away. she has three others who are not mine.
four her step daughters from a previous marriage are also rejecting her, so there is pain all around.
i am afraid that i am not handling it very well. i keep asking God for pain relief, but it not happen. pain just keep coming, rolling adding hurt upon hurt, each hour presents a new wave of disappointment distress pain hurt. it all looks so bleak. the colours of my world are dulling down. that means depression is not far away.
Help me Oh God. i cannot help her. i cannot change what has been. i cannot alter what other people feel or think about me and my wife. it hurts to be so rejected by people to whom you have loved as best as a hurting person knows how.
to my daughter i offer no excuses, i did what i did, i believed it to be for the best, if it wasnt then i apologise and ask forgiveness. but she doesnt hear that. has been blinded by academia and convinced that her experience ( all the bad ones ) are my fault.
i am dying inside. my only child is rejecting me. please help me Jesus.
