[FONT=arial black, avant garde]“But now put away and rid yourselves [completely] of all these things: anger, rage, bad feeling toward others, curses and slander, and foulmouthed abuse and shameful utterances from your lips!”[/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]Colossians 3:8[/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]“Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.”[/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]Mark Twain[/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]We have all dealt with anger, but many of us don’t understand the consequences of anger. We do more damage to ourselves with anger than the person that receives our anger. It is important for us to face our anger and start discovering exactly why we are so anger. [/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]The first step to healing is discovering we have an anger problem. During this time of discovery, we must admit that the anger is real and that we need healing. It is vital that we know the healing process will take time and energy. Each time we deal with our anger, we will feel drained. We may actually feel like giving up, but it is necessary to feel these emotions and press through.[/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]As we discover our anger problem, we may feel ashamed and hurt by our own imperfections. This is where we need to forgive ourselves and understand that we are human. Everybody has an imperfection that they must work on. At least, we are doing something about this problem and not leaving it to fester. The longer it takes us to face the problem, the more time and energy it will take for healing. [/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]Now, after we have admitted the problem and are ready to work on it, it is time for the second step. The second step is to figure out why we are so angry. This is not a time for just dwelling on old memories, but a time to explore and get healing from our past and present. Surprisingly, some of us may be angry because we feel our future is grim. The past, present, and future should have no hold over us, but we allow them to rule over us. [/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]Our memories are like a photo album, so we can flip through our mental photo album and see each memory. As we look at each memory, we need to focus on our feeling when we look at the memory. Does anger or hurt feelings arise when you remember the event, or is there peace and joy? If there is anger or hurt feelings, this is one of the spots that could be causing the anger. Don’t stop at one memory. Go through and look at them all, because most of us are angry over multiple things. We need to make a list of the hot spots as we go through our memories.[/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]“Understand [this], my beloved brethren. Let every man be quick to hear [a ready listener], slow to speak, slow to take offense and to get angry.”[/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]James 1:19[/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]Next, we need look at our list of anger and hurts. As we examine the hot spots, we need to ask ourselves who or what hurt us or made us angry. This is very tough, because we are still holding on to the feelings. If we feel angry during this time, we need to breathe and ask God to take the anger and hurt away. It is important to verbally say, “I forgive whatever or whoever hurt me and made me angry.”[/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]As we allow God into the pain and give Him the freedom to heal us, we will slowly feel the anger drain from our bodies. The one thing to remember is that the feeling of anger likes to creep back into our lives, so we need to immediately forgive the person or situation as feeling arises. [/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]This is a process that takes time. When we deal with memories, we need to deal with them one at a time, so, once we are healed from one memory, we must turn to the other memories that are keeping us in bondage. Many times, this is a cycle and can take a few months to several years, because we all feel pain and need to learn to forgive. [/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]Forgiveness does not come naturally, so it is a learning process. Of course, there are some people who are more fluent in forgiveness, so it is less of a challenge when hurtful situations occur. For the rest of us, we have to learn forgiveness, and we need to constantly remind ourselves to forgive. After awhile, forgiveness does become easier if we are constant. We need to constantly be aware of our feelings toward people and situations, so we can make the necessary changes and forgive quickly.[/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]“Let all bitterness and indignation and wrath (passion, rage, bad temper) and resentment (anger, animosity) and quarreling (brawling, clamor, contention) and slander (evil-speaking, abusive or blasphemous language) be banished from you, with all malice (spite, ill will, or baseness of any kind).”[/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]Ephesians 4:31[/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]“For every minute you remain angry, you give up sixty seconds of peace of mind.”[/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]Ralph Waldo Emerson[/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]Of course, we need to go back and forgive past hurts and ask God to take away our anger, but we also need to work on the daily anger that arises. When things make us angry, we need to learn techniques such as prayer, counting, and considering the consequences. These are ways we can immediately deal with anger. Anger will arise from time to time, so it is important to know how to let it go immediately or, at least, as quick as possible.[/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]Prayer changes everything. We need to learn how to stay in contact with God continuously. As we pray, it can become a habit. Unfortunately, we usually do the opposite of prayer. We take the matter into our own hands and give into our anger. This explosion can hurt everyone around us, but it especially hurts us. [/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]Here is a scenario that demonstrates how to pray when we are faced with a situation that leaves us angry:[/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]A parent of a student at our child’s school walks in and starts attacking our child. They begin to berate our child and call her all sorts of names. This parent may even start cussing at our child. As this happens, first we are shocked, but then anger sets in and we are ready to attack this parent. When we feel the anger start to come over us, we need to immediately say, “God, help me act appropriate and forgive this parent. Give me the words to resolve this situation.”[/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]Colossians 3:8[/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]“Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.”[/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]Mark Twain[/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]We have all dealt with anger, but many of us don’t understand the consequences of anger. We do more damage to ourselves with anger than the person that receives our anger. It is important for us to face our anger and start discovering exactly why we are so anger. [/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]The first step to healing is discovering we have an anger problem. During this time of discovery, we must admit that the anger is real and that we need healing. It is vital that we know the healing process will take time and energy. Each time we deal with our anger, we will feel drained. We may actually feel like giving up, but it is necessary to feel these emotions and press through.[/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]As we discover our anger problem, we may feel ashamed and hurt by our own imperfections. This is where we need to forgive ourselves and understand that we are human. Everybody has an imperfection that they must work on. At least, we are doing something about this problem and not leaving it to fester. The longer it takes us to face the problem, the more time and energy it will take for healing. [/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]Now, after we have admitted the problem and are ready to work on it, it is time for the second step. The second step is to figure out why we are so angry. This is not a time for just dwelling on old memories, but a time to explore and get healing from our past and present. Surprisingly, some of us may be angry because we feel our future is grim. The past, present, and future should have no hold over us, but we allow them to rule over us. [/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]Our memories are like a photo album, so we can flip through our mental photo album and see each memory. As we look at each memory, we need to focus on our feeling when we look at the memory. Does anger or hurt feelings arise when you remember the event, or is there peace and joy? If there is anger or hurt feelings, this is one of the spots that could be causing the anger. Don’t stop at one memory. Go through and look at them all, because most of us are angry over multiple things. We need to make a list of the hot spots as we go through our memories.[/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]“Understand [this], my beloved brethren. Let every man be quick to hear [a ready listener], slow to speak, slow to take offense and to get angry.”[/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]James 1:19[/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]Next, we need look at our list of anger and hurts. As we examine the hot spots, we need to ask ourselves who or what hurt us or made us angry. This is very tough, because we are still holding on to the feelings. If we feel angry during this time, we need to breathe and ask God to take the anger and hurt away. It is important to verbally say, “I forgive whatever or whoever hurt me and made me angry.”[/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]As we allow God into the pain and give Him the freedom to heal us, we will slowly feel the anger drain from our bodies. The one thing to remember is that the feeling of anger likes to creep back into our lives, so we need to immediately forgive the person or situation as feeling arises. [/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]This is a process that takes time. When we deal with memories, we need to deal with them one at a time, so, once we are healed from one memory, we must turn to the other memories that are keeping us in bondage. Many times, this is a cycle and can take a few months to several years, because we all feel pain and need to learn to forgive. [/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]Forgiveness does not come naturally, so it is a learning process. Of course, there are some people who are more fluent in forgiveness, so it is less of a challenge when hurtful situations occur. For the rest of us, we have to learn forgiveness, and we need to constantly remind ourselves to forgive. After awhile, forgiveness does become easier if we are constant. We need to constantly be aware of our feelings toward people and situations, so we can make the necessary changes and forgive quickly.[/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]“Let all bitterness and indignation and wrath (passion, rage, bad temper) and resentment (anger, animosity) and quarreling (brawling, clamor, contention) and slander (evil-speaking, abusive or blasphemous language) be banished from you, with all malice (spite, ill will, or baseness of any kind).”[/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]Ephesians 4:31[/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]“For every minute you remain angry, you give up sixty seconds of peace of mind.”[/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]Ralph Waldo Emerson[/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]Of course, we need to go back and forgive past hurts and ask God to take away our anger, but we also need to work on the daily anger that arises. When things make us angry, we need to learn techniques such as prayer, counting, and considering the consequences. These are ways we can immediately deal with anger. Anger will arise from time to time, so it is important to know how to let it go immediately or, at least, as quick as possible.[/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]Prayer changes everything. We need to learn how to stay in contact with God continuously. As we pray, it can become a habit. Unfortunately, we usually do the opposite of prayer. We take the matter into our own hands and give into our anger. This explosion can hurt everyone around us, but it especially hurts us. [/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]Here is a scenario that demonstrates how to pray when we are faced with a situation that leaves us angry:[/FONT]
[FONT=arial black, avant garde]A parent of a student at our child’s school walks in and starts attacking our child. They begin to berate our child and call her all sorts of names. This parent may even start cussing at our child. As this happens, first we are shocked, but then anger sets in and we are ready to attack this parent. When we feel the anger start to come over us, we need to immediately say, “God, help me act appropriate and forgive this parent. Give me the words to resolve this situation.”[/FONT]
