All these years of blaming and hating have come full circle. I thought that because of how others had treated me that I deserved to have some respect given to me. I never thought that my words could have caused so much hate from others. I have a tendency to want to feel liked now because I was hated early on in grade school.
So yeah, I realized that one thing I did that made others hate me was the fact that I had called people's names and others didn't like it. Even though they were sensitive, I didn't care. I felt great and I didn't think that I was being mean. I felt justified. I was in the second grade. I'm finally coming clean about everything.
Most of the time people couldn't stand me because I was quite loud in class. I had a loud laugh and others were telling me to keep it down. I didn't accept constructive criticism, so I lashed out at others and said,"Well, since others laughed, how come I couldn't?" It turns out that the intensity and volume of that laugh may have made a difference, setting others off. I felt like I was being blamed for things I didn't do, which I did do. the problem was that whenever I got hurt or when someone tried to hurt me, my teachers would never listen to me and that frustrated me and made me felt like I was not important or worth anything. That they are more precious than I was. I felt like I could have said something more. but the courage to talk back had escaped me that moment.
So yeah, I realized that one thing I did that made others hate me was the fact that I had called people's names and others didn't like it. Even though they were sensitive, I didn't care. I felt great and I didn't think that I was being mean. I felt justified. I was in the second grade. I'm finally coming clean about everything.
Most of the time people couldn't stand me because I was quite loud in class. I had a loud laugh and others were telling me to keep it down. I didn't accept constructive criticism, so I lashed out at others and said,"Well, since others laughed, how come I couldn't?" It turns out that the intensity and volume of that laugh may have made a difference, setting others off. I felt like I was being blamed for things I didn't do, which I did do. the problem was that whenever I got hurt or when someone tried to hurt me, my teachers would never listen to me and that frustrated me and made me felt like I was not important or worth anything. That they are more precious than I was. I felt like I could have said something more. but the courage to talk back had escaped me that moment.