I have been married for about a year and a half now, I am 20 and my husband is 21. We have a daughter together and she is 1. I love my husband of course, and I think of him as a good person but lately he has been being very lazy. He lost his Job in October and it's almost April and he still doesnt have another one. He went out looking for another job maybe 4 days in the past 5 months. He is also addicted to Video Games, plays them all the time cant get him off. He doesnt help me around the house and I have to always ask him to help with the Baby, he never get's up and does hardly anything on his own because he is so stuck on his video games all the time.
He was good in the beginning, He had a job and worked 12 hour shifts. I always knew video games where his hobby (although I didnt know how much he was addicted.) We bought a house together once he started making decent money. We live in a nice town and our house is small but very cute. So at the start of everything it all looked so good. He seemed like a hard worker and I loved the town we moved to and we had a daughter all in the same year.
Then he started in on his video games after work and would be on them all night, even if he had to work the next day. It got crazy. I couldnt believe one person could spend so many hours on a game. He ended up falling asleep at work and got fired. And Like I said since then he is planted in the chair in front of the games. Once we almost had foreclosure on our house because we didnt have any income and a family member lent us the money for exchange of his video games until we paid them back. He still found ways to play though, borrowed from friends etc.. But we paid them back with our Tax's and the games are back full force.
It has been really dragging on my heart. He doesnt take care of things, we even got our garbage shut off and I went to buy Hefty bags because he would leave garbage everywhere. And then the Garabge piled in the Breeze-way in the Hefty bags until the Breeze-way was full and he never would bat a eye-lash at it. He didnt even notice! Of course it was noticable but he just isnt with it. When I asked him to take care of it for me he said yes but of course didnt, so when I finally got so sick of it I packed it all in the car and it filled the trunk, Back seat, front seat top to bottom and it still all didnt fit. I brought it to a dumpster and there was minimal garbage in there before but when I was done the dumpster was over-flowing. Thats just a example of how he truly doesnt take care of things. Another is I asked him to do the dish's and he would not do them. I watched them pile up for weeks and was on his back everyday and One day he got up and stacked them. Thats it. The next few days after I got after him again he did half of them and left the other half in the sink. After a few days the water still in the sink with the rest of the dish's I finally cracked and I did the rest.
I normally dont let the house get that bad, but I wanted to see how far he would let them go and he went at least a month. It took him a whole Month to stack and wash half the dish's. Now I dont let anything get to that degree because I take care of it all, Even today (we still have garbage shut off) I seen that we had 3 garabge bags piled up and I said to him "We have to go to your mom's to drop off the garbage" and he says to me "Why are you stressing over it".
I dont get it.... I know that the video games are probably the biggest factor in his problem because thats really what he does with his life. He gets up and gets on the computer or his X-Box. I cant get him off. He does take me out on the weekends I will give him that, we both enjoy Hockey together and we go see movies. And I know he loves me but I cant get over his laziness.
I know this is really long, But I really need help and I wanted someone to know the whole background. I am Christian and am married and just will not divorce, I only been married a year and a half I cant even believe seperation has even crossed my mind. Everyday though, when I have to get the baby in the morning while he sleeps in (You cant wake the guy up, he sleeps like the dead) And I have to get her fed and changed and ready and then I start my day doing Laundry and regular chores, and then I see him get up and go straight to the computer...Oh it does something to me. I complain and sometimes I yell, sometimes I beg and plead with him and he just says I'm over-reacting. I need advice on what to do. I'm lost and confused.
He was good in the beginning, He had a job and worked 12 hour shifts. I always knew video games where his hobby (although I didnt know how much he was addicted.) We bought a house together once he started making decent money. We live in a nice town and our house is small but very cute. So at the start of everything it all looked so good. He seemed like a hard worker and I loved the town we moved to and we had a daughter all in the same year.
Then he started in on his video games after work and would be on them all night, even if he had to work the next day. It got crazy. I couldnt believe one person could spend so many hours on a game. He ended up falling asleep at work and got fired. And Like I said since then he is planted in the chair in front of the games. Once we almost had foreclosure on our house because we didnt have any income and a family member lent us the money for exchange of his video games until we paid them back. He still found ways to play though, borrowed from friends etc.. But we paid them back with our Tax's and the games are back full force.
It has been really dragging on my heart. He doesnt take care of things, we even got our garbage shut off and I went to buy Hefty bags because he would leave garbage everywhere. And then the Garabge piled in the Breeze-way in the Hefty bags until the Breeze-way was full and he never would bat a eye-lash at it. He didnt even notice! Of course it was noticable but he just isnt with it. When I asked him to take care of it for me he said yes but of course didnt, so when I finally got so sick of it I packed it all in the car and it filled the trunk, Back seat, front seat top to bottom and it still all didnt fit. I brought it to a dumpster and there was minimal garbage in there before but when I was done the dumpster was over-flowing. Thats just a example of how he truly doesnt take care of things. Another is I asked him to do the dish's and he would not do them. I watched them pile up for weeks and was on his back everyday and One day he got up and stacked them. Thats it. The next few days after I got after him again he did half of them and left the other half in the sink. After a few days the water still in the sink with the rest of the dish's I finally cracked and I did the rest.
I normally dont let the house get that bad, but I wanted to see how far he would let them go and he went at least a month. It took him a whole Month to stack and wash half the dish's. Now I dont let anything get to that degree because I take care of it all, Even today (we still have garbage shut off) I seen that we had 3 garabge bags piled up and I said to him "We have to go to your mom's to drop off the garbage" and he says to me "Why are you stressing over it".
I dont get it.... I know that the video games are probably the biggest factor in his problem because thats really what he does with his life. He gets up and gets on the computer or his X-Box. I cant get him off. He does take me out on the weekends I will give him that, we both enjoy Hockey together and we go see movies. And I know he loves me but I cant get over his laziness.
I know this is really long, But I really need help and I wanted someone to know the whole background. I am Christian and am married and just will not divorce, I only been married a year and a half I cant even believe seperation has even crossed my mind. Everyday though, when I have to get the baby in the morning while he sleeps in (You cant wake the guy up, he sleeps like the dead) And I have to get her fed and changed and ready and then I start my day doing Laundry and regular chores, and then I see him get up and go straight to the computer...Oh it does something to me. I complain and sometimes I yell, sometimes I beg and plead with him and he just says I'm over-reacting. I need advice on what to do. I'm lost and confused.
