I have experienced sexual violation that went on over a period of years when I was growing up. I have been in therapy in one form or another for it since I was 21 years old. I've been medicated, journaled, written, participated in support groups, and continued to seek out counselors and ministers about it because I have never felt that I was completely OK, even though I did get a lot better. I'm generally not afraid of men now. I am able to work with men and have friendships with men. So, I thought that the stronger emotions and uncontrollable reactions were a thing of the past.
Today a mentally disabled person my organization works with got carried away. He was just going to give me a hug like he always does, but he wouldn't let go and he started kissing me. I struggled to get him to let me go. I ended up getting away from him without much damage done, and got help from co-workers.
I was shaking and couldn't breath at first, but all things considered, it didn't take too long for me to pull myself together. Then later, the very next moment that I was alone, I broke down and cried really hard. All the emotions and reactions to men that I had been dealing with and thought were behind me came rushing back.
I'm still not OK from being traumatized when I was a youth.
Today a mentally disabled person my organization works with got carried away. He was just going to give me a hug like he always does, but he wouldn't let go and he started kissing me. I struggled to get him to let me go. I ended up getting away from him without much damage done, and got help from co-workers.
I was shaking and couldn't breath at first, but all things considered, it didn't take too long for me to pull myself together. Then later, the very next moment that I was alone, I broke down and cried really hard. All the emotions and reactions to men that I had been dealing with and thought were behind me came rushing back.
I'm still not OK from being traumatized when I was a youth.
