no intimacy, young married couple...

[Poppyseed78]

Ok.

 

[Dave-W]

While the physical part is not the most important element,

I totally agree on this part. If it were, we never would have made it thru the first year together. It was a lot of fun to hear stuff like "I love you but wish sex would just go away," and "I went 10 years without anything before we got married, and can go another 10 starting right now," just a few weeks after the honeymoon. And of course the ever-popular: "If you wanted sex more than just to have kids you married the wrong girl."

We recently celebrated out 39th anniv. Yes things got better, some; mostly in past few years. But there was at least a decade that we had where we could count the number of intimate encounters in a year on one hand. (5 or less)


To be fair, between all the Gothardite negativity from church and 4 years of ongoing sexual abuse as a grade schooler, she hated sex in general and male sexuality specifically. I am sure she had no idea that when we got married all that stuff would come bubbling back up to the surface. It was seriously hard work to get past all that stuff to try to be intimate.

 

[Purpurin]

Just a thought. Is your husband healthy? Is he working too hard and always tired?
Could it be that he's hiding some sort of medical condition? Maybe it's not that he doesn't want to have sex? Maybe he just could not get it to work?

Could it be that he's using the weight as a reasoning to hide the real reason why he doesn't want to be intimate?