My depression is eating me up ***WARNING TRIGGER***

[aflower4God]

I don't know what to say,
I have been planing on my escape to God for sometime now. This crush has taken a toll on me.
I didn't go to work today and I am planning on quitting, no this has nothing to do with that crush but this new girl who hates me cause I am sweet looking, same old same old.
I am super lonely, I am sure that you all can tell the way I am online so much.
I have been denied puplic transportation cause of the distance that I live at.
I don't feel safe in the neighborhood and even if I did where would I go, to 7/11 no that is not place to socialize. I agree when people say that I def. need to make more friends, THAT IS A MUST!!!!!
I have said said this before all the churches near me have ignored my email's and phone calls, so that is a no go.
My only offline friend and I are fighting constently cause she does not want to leave this home cause of her crush on that Russian guy and the refusese to deal with change.
I have been in this situation long enough.
I would have downloaded skype long ago but my little computer only has 1g of ram in it and it alreay uses 70% of memory as it is.
I will NOT go to a mental home cause in this state they treat you like crap.
<staff edit> I have been thinking about this, it just seems that God will not help anymore.
Thank you for videos and prayers and advice but for some reason it never helped, it will never take over the pain of loneliness that I am feeling and the huge rejection of that stupid crush of mine.
YES Loved33 is very right that dumb crush is a simple reminder of my parents, chasing after someone who just does not want me!
THE PAIN is too much to bare, I am going to contact the Pope or his assistant via email to see if I can get the green light (as in def. assurance) for me to be with God as in my way to be with God.
LONELINESS IS THE WORST!
Many prayers to you all
PLEASE DON"T HATE ME!!! PLEASE I had to get this out, this is eating me up so badly. I HURT SO BADLY
MODS PLEASE know that I am sorry if I posted anything that may have been too much as in a trigger, PLEASE FORGIVE ME.

 

[SplendidTree]

Sister, we love you so very much! You are so precious to us and to Jesus as well. I am sorry you are suffering and in a bad area, but don't forget you are thinking of moving up and out. If we keep praying, the Lord may open doors and if He does, you may be back here posting on how great you are doing!

No matter what God's plan is, it is a good one because He has our best interests in mind. I will continue to pray for you.

Maybe your crush doesn't work out now because God has better in store for you! This year has amazing potential, sister.

Praying as I post. I love you!

 

[HopingForJesus]

Flower...please do not do anything rash. God loves you and does not want you to end your life. Please hang in there and get the extra help you need.

 

[aflower4God]

(((((((Big hugs)))))))))))) Thank you both, my only offline friend has written her father about this issue and other issue's. So maybe this time God will work through her father to help us move out of this home to a location wehre I can walk to a church!!!!! I really don't want to take my life, I would MUST RATHER have a better guy instore for me and to find a job where I know I can feel pretty much at peace. Taking my life scares me to death cause I know it is forever, I want so badly, for God to do something maraculous I have been, that is why I posted this thread maybe God will preform a maricle, somehow, I just don't know.
((((((((HUGS))))))))

 

[Revived]

Heavenly Father,

I ask You in the name and through the Blood of Your Divine Son to rebuke the enemy for taking captive that which belongs to You. Lord, please help this dear sister to discern the lies of the enemy so that she doesn't give any credence to thoughts that are not in alignment with Your truth. Help her to examine her thoughts in light of Your Word at all times. In Philippians 4:7, we are told "The peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus." Father, thank You that Your peace can and will guard her heart from unproductive emotions and feelings that only serve to shatter her life. Thank You that the depths of Your peace are greater than we can imagine and that through this peace, she will be made whole. Giver of strength, courage and peace, pour Your Spirit upon her to become all You've created her to be. Overflow her mind and heart Father with Your love, peace, joy, gentleness, kindness, and mercy. In Jesus' precious and saving name, Amen.

 

[Revived]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DO_Phl9XCHg

 

[SplendidTree]

Praying that her father can help you out and for God to open those doors!

 

[Dianna_Child of God]

Oh hun please do not do anything that will harm yourself. Please do not give up. Please. We love you. God loves you even when times are so hard we feel like we can not handle them.

 

[Criada]

Praying that the situation will be sorted out soon.
In the meantime, sweetie, please look after yourself, because you are very precious to us all.
I know God's timing seems very hard to understand, but He really does know best, Flower, and one day you will look back on this and see what He was preparing for you.
Love you, sis

 

[Miss Elly]

Praying for you Flower!!!! I'm sorry you're so emotionally distressed and depressed. The devil likes to take full advantage of folks in a weakened condition. You know, all the folks and friends who care about you in these forums, are not going to take no for an answer...God will help you and He will not allow satan to destroy you. Take care!!!

 

[GryffinSong]

This has the ring of truth. Please focus on this statement, right here. Focus on that, and work toward finding a better environment for you. As long as you focus on wanting to live, all else can be worked out. Hugs to you, and best of luck. I know you can improve your life!!!

 

[aflower4God]

((((((((hugs thank you all))))))))))))

 

[Christine Hughes]

I've been feeling low lately i have been praying a lot, what has helped me most is praying Gods armour on myself morning and night Ephesians 6: 10 to 18 pray it over yourself in Jesus's name, maybe also pray and tell God how you feel and ask him to take these unwanted thoughts from you, God bless you and i will pray for you

 

[miss-a]

Flower, you know I dearly love you. Please hang on. We are praying and God will move in His time. He causes all things to work together for good for you, because you love Him and are called according to His purposes. Please don't agree with the enemy when he vomits his lies your way. Grab your battlefield of the Mind book to help you remember the truth.

And also, don't let that co-worker have power over you.You are a daughter of God.You do not have to quit your job. See it through for as long as you can. It is good for you. Remember, when you walk in there you have Jesus on your arm. You are safe, much safer than you feel. Don't let your fears get the best of you. Stand up to them in Jesus name. You have a right to your job. Walk in there, have some scriptures in your pocket, smile at the people whether they like you or not, and do the best job you know how. Don't let that be taken from you, okay?

Praying hard,
a

 

[aflower4God]

Thank you all,
dear sweet sister Miss-a I wish I had better news but my friend's dad (who is a doctor) said that right now in the state that I am in that it would be best if I left the job, I only had 5 weeks left. I did send an email to my job coach and social worker letting them know, I told them the truth.
Thank you for your prayers. ((((BIG HUGS))))))

 

[SplendidTree]

I hope it goes well, sister. Much love and prayers for you!

 

[aflower4God]

Thank you Cally I hope that you all don't think different of me you know what I mean, I have been so worried about that. 's

 

[SplendidTree]

Oh goodness no. Don't even worry about it sister. You have seen me at my low times as well. The thing is, when you may be down, we can help give you a boost! I certainly notice the boosts you have given me when I am down. We just take turns so to speak.

I don't think anything less of you at all.

 

[knw1991]

praying for you

 

[aflower4God]

((((((((KNW1991)))))))))) Thank you so much my dear sweet loving sister. GOD BLESS YOU.