- Feb 5, 2002
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When I became a Christian in high school I got involved with the Protestant ministry that introduced me to Christ. This led eventually to me being a “leader” in this ministry and helping to host camps for teenagers. It was wildly formative as I was able to work alongside men, young and old, and learn how they did things, handled challenges, and even loved their wives. This was all new to me, since I had not grown up in such an explicitly “God-first” ecosystem.
After becoming Catholic, my understanding of the Christian ecosystem grew, especially in the realm of sexual morality. While there are exceptions, the Protestant communities all around us have very little depth to their understanding of sexual intimacy. Often, it just gets boiled down to “sex should not be done until marriage, but after marriage, anything goes.”
At one of the camps I mentioned, I remember when all of the single guys retired to a group cabin and the married ones to family cabins. As we lay there, one of the leaders (who was older than me) said, “Just think, those married guys get to go to their cabins and just slide right into their wives.” Everyone started laughing and agreeing – “Won’t it be great to be married and have a lot of sex?” By “sliding into their wives”, in case you missed it, he meant intercourse.
In further discussions it became clear, we young men had accepted the idea that lust will be cured by marriage, when we can just satisfy that “need” using our spouse. There is a certain truth lurking somewhere here, which St. Paul notes. In the letter to the Corinthians, he praises the celibate life, but also notes that it is better to be married than to be burning with passion:
Continued below.
After becoming Catholic, my understanding of the Christian ecosystem grew, especially in the realm of sexual morality. While there are exceptions, the Protestant communities all around us have very little depth to their understanding of sexual intimacy. Often, it just gets boiled down to “sex should not be done until marriage, but after marriage, anything goes.”
At one of the camps I mentioned, I remember when all of the single guys retired to a group cabin and the married ones to family cabins. As we lay there, one of the leaders (who was older than me) said, “Just think, those married guys get to go to their cabins and just slide right into their wives.” Everyone started laughing and agreeing – “Won’t it be great to be married and have a lot of sex?” By “sliding into their wives”, in case you missed it, he meant intercourse.
In further discussions it became clear, we young men had accepted the idea that lust will be cured by marriage, when we can just satisfy that “need” using our spouse. There is a certain truth lurking somewhere here, which St. Paul notes. In the letter to the Corinthians, he praises the celibate life, but also notes that it is better to be married than to be burning with passion:
Continued below.
Marriage Will Not Cure Your Lust
The single life is the time to gain self-mastery, to learn true freedom through self-denial, and to learn to look forward to the sanctification of your future spouse. You should be praying for her now, not longing for a female body to play with. It’s time to grow up and conquer lust because...
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