I'm older than my parents were when they got married.

[Living4Him03]

I have a friend whose parents didn't marry til their mid 30s, had their first child at like 39 and had him, the baby, when his dad was 47! His Dad is now 71. I should hope he's not expecting to repeat what happened with his parents!

 

[jenptcfan]

Luckily, my parents aren't crazy about kids, so I don't get the "when are we going to have some grandkids" talk. Plus, my sisters are much older than I and they both have "kids" (teenagers now).

 

[gsmithcat]

Thanks for the Scripture references and the reminders of awesome examples of single lives in the Bible, KeilCoppes!

And thanks for posting Psalm 139, fishstix! It's hard to feel lonely when I read that!

And thanks for all the general cheeriness (is that a word? ) everyone!

 

[Out of the Flames]

I'm older than when my parents were married also.

I think that society has evolved a bit from our parents' generation to ours. There isn't so much emphasis on settling down to raise a family anymore. It's more about education, careers, chasing the almighty dollar, and sowing one's wild oats. Family and marriage tend to be secondary goals nowadays. And given that structure, it's probably a good thing that people are waiting longer to get married, because going into marriage with your priorities out of whack can only end very badly.

 

[KeilCoppes]

I think that society has evolved a bit from our parents' generation to ours....

.... It's more about education, careers, chasing the almighty dollar, and sowing one's wild oats. ....given that structure, it's probably a good thing that people are waiting longer to get married, because going into marriage with your priorities out of whack can only end very badly.

Flames, I'd echo except to perhaps cast it as a society that's migrating in some areas while degenerating in others. I'll agree and give many kudos to echo - indeed, getting married with whacked priorities will very likely be disastrous. This includes getting married to solve the innermost failings of your heart, including to fill self-centered dreams requiring white picket fences, little ones, and dream lives as checkboxes to self....

 

[sweetpotatoqueen50]

I would give my eyeteeth to be able to wed a college sweetheart at the age of 22 like some starry-eyed Southern belle of yesteryear. Never having to slog through the dating scene again ever. Remember that old saying: " (a daughter) has to leave home in either a white gown or a pine box"? Actually in Georgia, it's not just our parents' generation that married young. Everyone seems to get married young down here. I attended a technical college and there wasn't a "Miss" in the place over the age of 25! And virtually all of the women in Cosmetology (50 in all, only one female didn't have a S.O.) had a boyfriend/husband or child. It was not unusual to find young wives or single moms younger than me. And I was 22-24 at the time.

In my home-town of Fayetteville Georgia, the dating pool seems to be limited to teenagers and seniors. (My current S.O. is a 22 -yr-old exception.) I have a saying, "the marriage market closes in Fayetteville at 21 and doesn't re-open again until 40." I hear only of college sweethearts getting announced in the paper and the remarriages of the middle-aged. It's tough to be a single twenty-something in F'ville (there ARE church singles' groups though.) I think it behooves us to consider a marriage no matter how soon the opportunity may present itself. Please, Christian brothers and sisters, do NOT bypass a good prospect with the lame excuse, "I'm only 23, I'm not ready to settle down....I'm just beginning to enjoy the single life....i'd hate to have to give up my freedom."

Life does not offer us a lot of chances for a great partnership. Even if we deserve it. Hear me out on this one.

Anyone up for arranged marriages? I can hear you young people now, "you don't have the right to pick out a mate for ME!!" But consider this. Could marrying a stranger be any worse than the gridlock of modern dating? In India, Asia and Eastern Europe the olde village matchmaker still exists just like in days of yore. And the alliances are between families, so it's not exactly total strangers getting together. And a lot of the time, it works.

That's my two cents. Society doesn't support courtship so thats why we don't get married as young as our parents did.

Be blessed,
Edie

 

[Living4Him03]

Nearly all the women in the social work program at my school are married or engaged. They will sit around before class and talk about their husbands or fiances. I don't even have a boyfriend or really anything close lol. It's kinda awkward I guess, but God's will is His will. I have a friend who is in her early 40s...never been married (engaged once) and is happily single, although if the right man comes along she would be happy with that as well. She is an awesome role model.

 

[Tuffguy]

Sweetpotato. You need to move.

 

[hischildsindik]

Well if I were my mom, at 33, she had 3 children, 10 (me), 13 and 15, divorced twice and in a not the greatest relationship.

So on one hand I am glad I was not married young, I've gotten to do a lot of my learning now before hand on what it takes in a marriage, although when the 'rubber hits the road' so to speak, we'll see. It's effort and the grace of God that makes a good marriage.

 

[gsmithcat]

I would give my eyeteeth...

What are "eyeteeth"?

Anyone up for arranged marriages? I can hear you young people now, "you don't have the right to pick out a mate for ME!!" But consider this. Could marrying a stranger be any worse than the gridlock of modern dating? In India, Asia and Eastern Europe the olde village matchmaker still exists just like in days of yore. And the alliances are between families, so it's not exactly total strangers getting together. And a lot of the time, it works.

I know what you mean. Hearing the term "arranged marriage" tends to make us freak out, but I've talked with some people from India who've had arranged marriages. It's a very different culture. They look at us and say, "How can you just randomly pick someone to marry on your own?". I don't know the statistics either, but they say they have a much lower divorce rate as well, and as husbands and wives they still seem just as loving and comitted as anyone.

 

[OhhJim]

I'm happier than my parents were at my age, probably because I'm single, and they were married.

 

[invisiblebabe]

I would give my eyeteeth to be able to wed a college sweetheart at the age of 22 like some starry-eyed Southern belle of yesteryear. Never having to slog through the dating scene again ever. Remember that old saying: " (a daughter) has to leave home in either a white gown or a pine box"? Actually in Georgia, it's not just our parents' generation that married young. Everyone seems to get married young down here. I attended a technical college and there wasn't a "Miss" in the place over the age of 25! And virtually all of the women in Cosmetology (50 in all, only one female didn't have a S.O.) had a boyfriend/husband or child. It was not unusual to find young wives or single moms younger than me. And I was 22-24 at the time.

I have a good friend in cosmetology I hope you're enjoying it!

I sometimes wish I lived in the South Right now I'm in northern IL, but after college is done, who knows?

I think it behooves us to consider a marriage no matter how soon the opportunity may present itself. Please, Christian brothers and sisters, do NOT bypass a good prospect with the lame excuse, "I'm only 23, I'm not ready to settle down....I'm just beginning to enjoy the single life....i'd hate to have to give up my freedom."

Totally agreed. No way am I going to miss out just because I think I'm "not old enough." If I meet a guy who's one in a million (maybe I already have ), I'm not going to decide I "need to enjoy the single life" and just let him pass me by.

Anyone up for arranged marriages? I can hear you young people now, "you don't have the right to pick out a mate for ME!!" But consider this. Could marrying a stranger be any worse than the gridlock of modern dating? In India, Asia and Eastern Europe the olde village matchmaker still exists just like in days of yore. And the alliances are between families, so it's not exactly total strangers getting together. And a lot of the time, it works.

Arranged marriages I'd have to say would be totally wrong for me, simply because my personality does not easily "click" with many others. Getting along is one thing; that's easy for me..... but really connecting on a deeper level only happens few and far between. For marriage, I want a strong connection with a man, and I definitely want us to be able to relate and understand one another. I'm such an oddball, that's hard to find, and I'd rather hold out and find that connection myself than trust someone else to arrange it for me.

 

[klewlis]

my parents were married at 18 and divorced at 22. I am now 26 and am SO glad that I did not do the same thing. In fact, ALL the women in my family (literally ALL of them) were married young and/or having babies young and they are ALL divorced now. Not a pattern that I'd like to follow!

Age doesn't matter, except that I'd love to have as many years as possible with my spouse. Aside from that, it really doesn't matter. You can still do so many cool things right now, and serve God and be the person he wants you to be.

 

[fishstix]

Anyone up for arranged marriages? I can hear you young people now, "you don't have the right to pick out a mate for ME!!" But consider this. Could marrying a stranger be any worse than the gridlock of modern dating? In India, Asia and Eastern Europe the olde village matchmaker still exists just like in days of yore. And the alliances are between families, so it's not exactly total strangers getting together. And a lot of the time, it works.

I wouldn't like arranged marriage at all. For one thing, I *like* being single right now. If my parents had arranged a marriage for me I would probably already be married and I'd rather be single. And just because I may have known someone since childhood it doesn't mean that I would want to marry that person. Also, just because two sets of parents are friends it doesn't mean that their offspring are going to grow up to actually like each other. I think marriage is about a lot more than a business transaction - which is what arranged marriages seem to be to me. And I would much rather put up with the ups and downs and uncertaintly of finding someone myself than end up locked into an unhappy marriage - especially if I wasn't even the one who made the choice to be married to that person in the first place. And like I said before, I wouldn't want to be married to anyone at all right now - even if it was someone of my own choosing. If I was forced to marry someone against my will, I'd basically see it as having my parents arrange for me to be raped by someone repeatedly for the rest of my life. The only being who I would trust to arrange a marriage for me is God.

 

[KeilCoppes]

Getting along is one thing; that's easy for me..... but really connecting on a deeper level only happens few and far between. For marriage, I want a strong connection with a man, and I definitely want us to be able to relate and understand one another. I'm such an oddball, that's hard to find, and I'd rather hold out and find that connection myself than trust someone else to arrange it for me.

My prayers that you find what you're looking for - such things are rare.

 

[invisiblebabe]

My prayers that you find what you're looking for - such things are rare.

Thank you for praying He's out there! Who knows; maybe I already know him!

 

[KeilCoppes]

Thank you for praying He's out there! Who knows; maybe I already know him!

Maybe you do! Hmmmmm. Now which one is he? eeny, meeny... Or is it one potato, two potato...? :^)

 

[hischildsindik]

it's more fun catching somone by their toe that counting potatos...

 

[sweetpotatoqueen50]

I would give my eyeteeth....

Dear Smith Cat,

Eyeteeth are incisors but in this case, it doesn't mean I'd literally have them pulled (HA!) It's just a figure of speech to say youd give your eyeteeth for something.

Just means preety much the same as "I would kill for...."