Guilt

[Apollo Celestio]

Exhorters and evangelicalism.. man. They do not have a monopoly on worship..

 

[NoodlesNoodlesNoodles]

So privately I've been told by a few of my therapists that a major reason I am at times problematic is the accumulation of guilt. Guilty lives are very anxious, this I know. However, their solution is to become not religious anymore, and I feel like that's throwing the baby out with the bathwater.

Is there any way to get rid of the guilt and keep the faith (puns!)?? Because I continually am feeling guilty about certain things I do, and though it makes sense to just ditch religion and live like however I want to, I also think that just bidding adieu to the dude who runs everything doesn't sound like a good idea either.

Realistic (i.e., rational) answers, please.

My own guilt anxiety was partly do to some OCD problems that I was not aware was OCD. My "coping mechanism" was always learning and work. When the anxiety about being unforgivable or in some way terribly displeasing to God stepped in, many folks might have said that I needed to memorize verses or study the Bible more. That was part of the OCD monster though. In reality, I knew the verses, I just had to stop overthinking and take a breather from the very topic that was making me lose my mind.

sometimes I would have to have a honest conversation with God and say "Hey, you know better than I do that I've got some issues right now, and I need a break from the compulsions, so I'll talk to you in a few weeks or a month or whatever..." and just bury myself in study and work. It got better once I took a breather. Took several years of that kind of thing. Got my head together. The Lord saw me through. I'm better than ever, I think. I can pray daily, read the Bible, study doctrine and generally know God better each day. That first hump was hard though.

Break life down into its simplest forms. Are you guilty? You've been forgiven if you believe on Christ. Still sinning? Confess. Move on. Get a hobby. Chill out.



All non-clinical advice, BTW.

 

[K9_Trainer]

You do have to remember that Christianity pushes for unrealistic standards of perfection. If you are constantly striving to achieve the impossible, then you are constantly failing, and that leads to constant guilt and feeling like crap about yourself.

You need to redirect your focus if you wish to maintain faith. Put your energy towards another aspect of Christianity and keep it away from your sin and how often you fall short of perfection. Loving others would be a good one. If more of the billions of Christians on earth loved like Jesus did instead of picking on one another, being anal about who's doctrine/teaching is wrong and fighting with atheists, the world might actually be a better place.

 

[He.Loves.You]

All of us Christians are (supposed to be) aimed toward a goal that is impossible in this life - to be like Christ. There are two extremes: the first is to say His grace and forgiveness covers everything I do, so I'm going to do whatever I want and get away with it.

The second is to set myself up as a more strict judge than God. If God says, "You are forgiven", and I say, "No wait, I need punishment", then I set myself as the golden standard for judgment and am basically calling God a liar. It is profound distrust in the most trustworthy being in existence.

Every one of us is, in fact, guilty, so it is ok to feel guilt - sometimes. Repentance is a heart condition, not a legal contract. Because you respect and love God you desire to give up sin X, and when you are tempted to do sin X you find yourself fighting that desire. You don't fight it to gain favor with God - you fight it because you love God.
The unrepentant heart doesn't fight the urge to sin - it just does what comes naturally. Or the unrepentant heart fights the urge for a different reason than loving God and wanting to obey Him.

A transformed heart strives to please God even though it often falls and fails. For this transformed heart there is mercy and forgiveness from God. A huge key is child-like trust in God. I don't trust God much of the time, but I take baby steps. And He is patient, not wanting any to perish, but all to come to repentance and a knowledge of Him.

God meets you where you are. God is perfectly comfortable with the full range of human emotion, including the dark stuff. You don't have to be joyous, happy, and bubbly to approach Him.

There is no quick fix to the Christian life. Trust. Repentance. Slowly being conformed to Christ. If the whole thing seems too impossible and big, that's because it is and it's meant to seem that way. Dependence on God to accomplish what He says He will accomplish.