Is Masturbation a sin?

I know one couple that I'd have thought had this type of intimacy but having hung around them I see a lot of really good communication that is there because they don't have that oneness. So to my knowledge I've not seen a good example of oneness. Now I know my grandfather and father watched their wives very closely as their health failed and because they were watching almost all the time knew when they needed things quite often. So I see and understand that type of oneness. I can do that myself.
I do know something of sacred sexuality and intimacy and have had some teaching and experiences have helped me a lot. So I can related somewhat to what your saying.

I think any couple that lives together harmoniously will experience moments of this: you call each other at the exact same moment, that sort of thing. With intention, and practice, it can deepen.

KTS said:

I do not cease being an individual just because I am married. Your religion may make this claim, but it is most definitely NOT a claim I agree with.



No one rules over me except me. My husband is not the boss of me.

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The word for one is ECHAD When Yeshua said the Father and I are one (echad) which means literately 1 and it also means in complete unity.

As for ruling over you. You're right... but then, you are in open rebellion against G-d

What AlexDTX said at the top of page 19 is important.

Jesus didn't chastise the Pharisees for their hypocrisy and spiritual sadism just to come in and do likewise.

AlexDTX said:

All carnality desensitizes us to the spirit. Be careful what you allow in your life.

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This is, in my experience, not true. It can be true, and yes, you should be careful what you allow in your life.

But God made this flesh for us experience to the fullest. We can exuberantly enjoy our carnality and experience the bliss of sensuality not as a distraction from God but as a sacrifice to God. The delight of your body can give as much honor to God as any other natural wonder created on this earth.

KitKatMatt said:

The only time a masturbation-esque action was condemned in the Bible was when Onan "spilled his seed" outside the body of his dead brother's wife and was punished for it.

And it wasn't even wrong because of "spilling his seed" itself, but because it was his "duty" to impregnate his brother's wife and he refused to do it.

So I'd say no, and no.

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I love the Onan argument. If masturbation is a sin then flowers that put out pollen that never reaches another flower are also spilling their seed and perhaps maybe they weren't sinning if they weren't looking at another flower when it happened. Bees collecting pollen and distributing it are also serial prostitutes.

BukiRob said:

The word for one is ECHAD When Yeshua said the Father and I are one (echad) which means literately 1 and it also means in complete unity.

As for ruling over you. You're right... but then, you are in open rebellion against G-d

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As an atheist, I'm not going to lose much sleep over it.

AphroditeGoneAwry said:

Also, husbands rule over their wives. Yes, with love! But they have the ultimate say as to how the one flesh shall be enjoyed.

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Men - husbands - have the "ultimate say?" Nowhere does the bible even hint at that. In fact, the first century cultural understanding was that sex was a WIFE's RIGHT and a husband's responsibility. (in the Jewish culture Jesus and the apostles all grew up with)

Matthias Rose said:

I don't know if this experience is what Jesus had in mind when he made his rather cryptic remark, but I suspect that it is, or I suspect that the experience is a reflection of a deeper truth that He understood in ways that we can only approximate.

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What "cryptic remark?" He was quoting Moses and everyone understood EXACTLY what he was talking about.

DaveW-Ohev said:

Men - husbands - have the "ultimate say?" Nowhere does the bible even hint at that. In fact, the first century cultural understanding was that sex was a WIFE's RIGHT and a husband's responsibility. (in the Jewish culture Jesus and the apostles all grew up with)

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'Rule over' encompasses that.

AphroditeGoneAwry said:

'Rule over' encompasses that.

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The husband was "contractually" obligated to keep his wife's "needs" met absolutely true.

At the risk of people taking this wrong.... women in general, have a great need to feel LOVED and that they are desired by their husbands. Men have, in general, a need to be respected. That is not to say that men don't need physical intimacy but men do not derive the same thing out of it that women generally do. A man can have sex with a female and it be nothing more that a physical release... no emotional connection just purely physical. Most women need to have more than just a physical connection.

When you see Paul say Husbands LOVE your wife. He is speaking directly to her need emotionally being fulfilled. Most men have a deep emotional need for respect. Which is why Paul tells the wife to submit herself to her husband. That doesn't mean that the man "lords over" his wife. But rather that his wife verbally expresses how much she values and appreciates his leadership.

A good analogy would be a CEO and a CFO. The CEO runs the company. He is the "buck stops here" guy or gal. Now, does the CEO micro mange the CFO? No, not if he or she is any good and expects to stay as the CEO for very long. In fact, once the major operational decisions have been made ( in a joint meeting with the entire management team) the CFO operates in near autonomy.

G-d holds the HUSBAND responsible for the spiritual life of the family. HELP MEET is what the wife is supposed to be. A man is a FOOL if he does not take council from his wife. They (ideally ) make decisions jointly.

The key to this starts when people recognize and accept that men and women are RADICALLY different but complementary.

AphroditeGoneAwry said:

'Rule over' encompasses that.

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And that, I fear, has been the justification of spousal rape. Just because I married a man, doesn't mean I am required to drop what I'm doing and jump into bed with him whenever he wants, no questions asked, without regard as to whether I am in the mood or not.

KTS said:

And that, I fear, has been the justification of spousal rape. Just because I married a man, doesn't mean I am required to drop what I'm doing and jump into bed with him whenever he wants, no questions asked, without regard as to whether I am in the mood or not.

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Why are you commenting? You are not a believer none of this even pertains to you. You are living your life and see things through a carnal mind. No believer would for a moment expect you to see let alone understand what scripture is saying because you cant.

1 Cor 2:14 But a natural man does not accept the things of the Spirit of God, for they are foolishness to him; and he cannot understand them, because they are spiritually appraised. Romans 8:7 "The sinful mind is hostile to God. It does not submit to God's law, nor can it do so."

AphroditeGoneAwry said:

Also, husbands rule over their wives. Yes, with love! But they have the ultimate say as to how the one flesh shall be enjoyed.

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Sure, as long as he respects the safewords, knock yourselves out...

KTS said:

And that, I fear, has been the justification of spousal rape. Just because I married a man, doesn't mean I am required to drop what I'm doing and jump into bed with him whenever he wants, no questions asked, without regard as to whether I am in the mood or not.

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Funny, because women seem to expect this from men. Expect them to have sex with them when ever the woman so desires it.

Of course, women don't physically force men to have sex with them either. Well... whatever tiny percent has it's not comparable to the rate of men physically forcing women into having sex with them.

FanofGod1992 said:

But my real question is, is it a sin if you do it and not look at inappropriate content. Because I do touch but I don't don't look at other women.

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Ask yourself this. Is masturbating to the thought of prepubescent children--not adult women--a sin?

dayhiker said:

Dave ... that shows to me more maturity in that church than I've seen in most churches. Thanks for sharing as I've heard so few who will speak that publicly to correct a past teaching.

I did a lot of thinking in my 20's after reading a church book for a boys youth program, forget the name now, that encouraged us not to touch. I can to the conclusion that it wasn't a sin when I was told wet dreams was the bodies natural way of release. The wet dreams I had were much more disturbing than any fantasy I ever had personally. So it was obvious to me that if God had created wet dreams as a means of last resort than masturbation wasn't wrong either.

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What about those adults that touch to erotic thoughts of prepubescent children?

What about those young adults that have wet dreams about prepubescent children?

What about masturbation or wet dreams involving rape?

Then we can draw a parallel to Mt.5:28. It is wrong to look and think about committing adultery as Jesus said. So it would be wrong to use our imagination
to think about anything that would hurt another whether sex is involved or not.

BukiRob said:

Why are you commenting? You are not a believer none of this even pertains to you. You are living your life and see things through a carnal mind. No believer would for a moment expect you to see let alone understand what scripture is saying because you cant.

1 Cor 2:14 But a natural man does not accept the things of the Spirit of God, for they are foolishness to him; and he cannot understand them, because they are spiritually appraised. Romans 8:7 "The sinful mind is hostile to God. It does not submit to God's law, nor can it do so."

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I didn't see anything here that says "Believers only."

KTS said:

I didn't see anything here that says "Believers only."

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A little late to make that call when you are replying to believers... but hey feel free to stand on that double standard