Would you remarry after divorce?

Will Joseph · Nov 3, 2021

I've been spending more time with family, including my half-brother. I feel a bit grateful to have a half-brother, but a bit ashamed because my dad was divorced many times. It's great to have a bigger family, but not at the cost of divorce. What is your experience with half-family?

Derf · Nov 3, 2021

My wife has a dozen siblings, most of whom are from another father. She loves them and they love her, and we all need to live our lives from this point on, not from 10 or 30 years ago. The one thing we shouldn't do is repeat the mistakes of our parents, since we have some insight into how hurtful they can be. But we still honor them as God told us to, knowing that we have plenty of mistakes we've made.

“Paisios” · Nov 3, 2021

Would I remarry after divorce? No. But I would not judge anyone who does. I value my half-brother and my stepsisters (though my father remarried after my mother’s death, not after divorce) and treasure all of my family whether through blood, marriage or adoption (and some I consider family through close bonds of friendship).

splish- splash · Nov 3, 2021

I do not have any half siblings but do know, such situations can cause, a lot of unwanted tension, especially if the parents involved, don't exactly encourage their kids, to embrace one another..

No remarrying for me, for as surely as the Lord liveth. I'd want my baby to be raised, in an intact home.

SkyWriting · Nov 3, 2021

Will Joseph said:
I've been spending more time with family, including my half-brother. I feel a bit grateful to have a half-brother, but a bit ashamed because my dad was divorced many times. It's great to have a bigger family, but not at the cost of divorce. What is your experience with half-family?

My half-sister was a very welcome addition to our family when she has visited.

PloverWing · Nov 3, 2021

Personally, no, I don't think so, as I'm uneasy about the whole business of breaking a solemn, sacramental vow.

But, like Paisios, I'm not going to condemn other people's choices. Marriage is a complicated thing, and I've seen a number of second marriages which were loving and wonderful.

com7fy8 · Nov 3, 2021

If I got into a divorce, I think it would be wise to evaluate how I got there, and not just hurry to get with someone else.

Because my own character and ways possibly helped to get me together with the wrong person, if this was the case. Plus, my own character and ways could have somehow helped to bring us to the divorce.

So, it would be possible that my own character and ways could just get me with someone wrong, again, and then another divorce.

I think I have seen how certain people are serial divorcers. They do not make sure with God about who they marry, their own character attracts them to a wrong person, then they blame the other person, act like a victim, then do the same thing again with someone else whose character attracts to the serial divorcer's character.

Sketcher · Nov 6, 2021

It would be pretty dumb for me to do it.

I would have demonstrated either an inability to keep a marriage together, or an inability to pick a woman who was interested in doing so.
"And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery." - Matthew 19:9
"Everyone then who hears these words of mine and does them will be like a wise man who built his house on the rock. And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house, but it did not fall, because it had been founded on the rock. And everyone who hears these words of mine and does not do them will be like a foolish man who built his house on the sand.
And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell, and great was the fall of it." - Matthew 7:24-27
"Unless the LORD builds the house, those who build it labor in vain. Unless the LORD watches over the city, the watchman stays awake in vain." - Psalm 127:1

So, my own abilities would have proven to be insufficient, and I wouldn't have God's backing if she still lived. If I were to marry again, I would want it to succeed, not fail - so I would need to build my house on the rock. But there's no rock here, only sand.

JimR-OCDS · Nov 7, 2021

We like to think we'd do the right thing if it happened.

However, when a person suddenly finds themselves in a situation which they had
no control over, their thinking changes.

If you were abandoned by your spouse and you were only 30 years old with two kids to
raise on your own, it would be improbable that you'd remain single after divorce.

I've been married for 48 years and it's been a blessing from God, I have no doubt.

However, I know other's who fit the explanation above and I can't blame them
for moving on with their lives after being abandoned by their spouse.

Ted Kaz · Nov 7, 2021

We all sin one way or an other. Feeling shame about your sin or someone else's does not help nor is it necessary. Repent, learn and do your best not to sin. That's the way forward imo.

My experience with my half siblings is great though my parents met and married after widowing rather then divorcing.

Would you remarry after divorce?