Why are you still single?

KarateJack · Feb 12, 2004

Honestly, I think Im not ready to date by my choice and God's.

First, Im still trying to heal some wounds from the past. I need to take care and repair myself before I can even worry about another.

Second, in my area, if you want to get a date, your best bet is the local club. I just don't think that I have to go to a "meat market" type place to meet a woman. Especially one with good standards.

Another is at the same time, I just think God wants me to stay put and be single for a while and get my life on good sailing altatude. Im graduating college soon and I gotta get my life on track and set. After thats taken care of, I should be ready.

KeilCoppes · Feb 12, 2004

KarateJack said:
I just think God wants me to stay put and be single for a while and get my life on good sailing altatude. Im graduating college soon and I gotta get my life on track and set. After thats taken care of, I should be ready.

Be wise, but keep your eyes open. I suddenly woke up one day at 27 and found out most folks were married. The next time I woke up I was 32 and it was just about everybody.

(ps - congrats on the Mountain Dew, but I'll stick with my Dr. Pepper, even if it doesn't have as much of a kick!)

marduke · Feb 12, 2004

i am single because i know that God will introduce me to "the one" when it is the right time. so i dont need to worry about it.
but i used to feel so lonely when i was single before i got saved.

ftw1029 · Feb 12, 2004

Wow. In my opinion, a lot of the people who have posted to this thread aren't even old enough to worry about being single yet. If you're 20 and you feel down about being single, let me tell you--wait until you're 29 or 30! That was when I really started to feel self-conscious about it.

Seriously, lots of good points have been made. When I get down about it, I try to remember that not all married people are happier than me. I think of my friend who is only 33 and already divorced. And he's not even one of the young ones!

I am still single for many reasons; the main one is that God didn't introduce me to anyone I could marry yet, which is inscrutable.

But does anyone ever feel like this?: Sometimes I lie in bed at night and feel so lonely, like I wish I had someone to hold me. But some (more) nights, I crawl under the covers and I get all comfy and I think, "I'm so glad I don't have to share my bed with anyone."

xtxArchxAngelxtx · Feb 12, 2004

Havn't yet found a girl worth getting into a relationship with.

HoosierCanuck · Feb 12, 2004

Another reason I'm single.....I don't trust my judgement. I married when I was 22...was divorced by the time I was 24 (no kids!). I thought I was marrying a 'decent, Christian' man. Turns out I was marrying a complete loser with decent Christian parents that he was looking for an opportunity to get out from underneath of. I did a lot of praying beforehand and it seemed that God was leading me to marry him....He didn't stop it anyway. I guess it was really Satan doing the leading all along. Knowing that I am easily fooled and taken advantage of because I am too nice....I avoid the whole relationship thing like the plague. My dad thinks I am 'secretly miserably single' and my mom thinks I'm lesbian because she only sees me hanging around my also-terminally-single female friend. (mom isn't a Christian and therefore doesn't understand that not all people who spend a lot of time together are 'involved')...I am strictly straight! I've been single so long now that the thought of coming home from work after a stressful day and having to cater to someone else's needs frightens me. Is that selfish?

KeilCoppes · Feb 12, 2004

HoosierCanuck said:
I've been single so long now that the thought of coming home from work after a stressful day and having to cater to someone else's needs frightens me. Is that selfish?

Not selfish, but it sounds like you've been badly cheated. A man who needs to be 'catered' to isn't much of a man in the way he treats his wife. A good man should be someone who is like a hug just to be around after a stressful day. Even if he had his own stressful day, after you've both had the time that you need, it should be a comfort rather than a drain to be together. Most home needs will take care of themselves fairly well undone if there are more important things like just being there and caring.

xtxArchxAngelxtx · Feb 12, 2004

She was still married... If you two were married then God would have found a way to keep you together.... but thats just my opinion.

HoosierCanuck · Feb 12, 2004

crydun · Mar 27, 2004

I took a quiz on Emode with this very title. They said that it was because I was "afraid of getting hurt." Probably some truth to that.

seangoh · Mar 28, 2004

wow it's been indeed exciting to read ALL these posts and of which some of them i could relate to especially KC's and Living4Him. oh before i forget, i should declare that i'm INTJ.hehee...i don't think it's suprising that there are so many IN*Js here. Because these are the people who bothers to find out reasons to life's questions. And they think and think and think and think. So we're all here in this cauldron trying to figure out a theory on our singleness...ok enough blabbering.

Why am i still single? Firstly, i've never had a gf before. Although i had a couple of bites last time but none officially pulled out into the boat. And just yesterday a girl who was 1 year older told me that i was handsome, kind, tall, specs and whatever and that girls will run after me. Yeah right, if that were true, why not she be my girlfriend. It can be quite sickening sometimes as some of you have mentioned when girls say that. oh well, i've just written something about my situation in the journal section and i'll just cut and paste it.

I do want a partner in my life. Perhaps i'm not ready yet that's why God has introduced me many women in my life to find out what i would really want in a girl. Through this i get to know more of myself and i'm thankful for that. But the question still remains, will God have a girl for me in the future? I know God wants me to be fully happy. People say that having God is enough to make one happy. If that's the case then it's possible that God wants me to be happy in Him and i won't need a partner. And if this is so, how sad i'll be...it's ironic i know, but to think that i'll have to live my whole life without a partner is unthinkable. Or is this feeling just temporary and that God is fixing and preparing me to live a life that has only Him inside and to be satisfied with Him alone? Still, the thought disturbs me. Human touch and compassion is still what i would desire now;someone whom i can love and be loved is what i want. I think about the few eligible singles out there who're into their 30s already. Makes me wonder why they are still single and who's "fault" is it anyway. Is it God's plan?or is it their own hidden character flaw that i still cannot see? I draw a parallel to myself..would i be like them?eligible yet single?

Lexi · Mar 28, 2004

I think I need to finish my education and strengthen my walk with God before I want to be in another serious relationship. Of course, if God decided to bring someone new into my life sometime in the near future, I would not turn them down.

Jedi · Mar 29, 2004

Single, eh? Man, Im stumped. I cant quite figure out why Im single. Im a totally awesome guy, and aside from that sloppy passport photo I have scanned online, Im freaking hot. Of course, theres always a bigger fish, but Im pretty darn big. Curious as to why I havent been caught yet. Im also one of the most humble guys around, which further contributes to my awesomeness.

Joking aside, I really cant figure it out. The only thing I can think of that would possibly stand to reason is that when I was around 9 years old, I looked in the mirror one day and said Dang, Im hot. I dont think Im going to make it sexually to marriage. Right then, I prayed for God to let me make it to that point in spite of myself. Of course, a few years later, acne struck me like pepperonis on a pizza, and only now has it nearly faded away completely. Yep, those were rough times. Perhaps that was a blessing in disguise; kept safe from temptation by being handicapped with that physical disability, I mean. But now that thats over, I just cant figure out this whole Why am I still single business. Divine intervention in response to that 9-year-olds prayer? Yeah, Im stickin to that explanation. This has to be the work of God here.

Jinnapiban · Mar 29, 2004

ftw1029 said:
But does anyone ever feel like this?: Sometimes I lie in bed at night and feel so lonely, like I wish I had someone to hold me. But some (more) nights, I crawl under the covers and I get all comfy and I think, "I'm so glad I don't have to share my bed with anyone."

ftw - I was married & felt like that...... it's worse when there's someone there & you feel that way, I promise!

I have been single again now for 6 years & I have learned some important things... God loves me more than He loved my marriage and MOST important, we must be whole, complete people before we marry, no one else can make you whole except for God. 2 half people don't make a whole person, they make a broken marriage..... you'll just have to trust me on this.

The most difficult thing I find about being single now is that everyone wants to know - am I dating? do I want to remarry? our society puts alot of pressure on people first to be married, and then to have children. We have to believe that God has a plan and not allow peer pressure to influence us to make unwise decisions. I know that I have a lot to offer if God has plans for me to marry again, but I have to believe that He wants me to offer those good qualities to everyone, not just "prospective" husbands.

seangoh · Mar 30, 2004

Jinnapiban said:
I have to believe that He wants me to offer those good qualities to everyone, not just "prospective" husbands.

Hmm...another justification why i'm still single. I can imagine if i have someone, i'll probably stop treating ppl so nice knowing that my gf would get jealous and it's not appropriate.

JPPT1974 · Mar 30, 2004

Several reasons I guess:
1. Not fond of men with the exception of my brother, brother in law, and dad
2. Not meant to get married nor have a boyfriend
3. Just haven't found the right man
4. Treasure my single life
5. Love my privacy and independence
6. Finds all men inferior for strange reasons I won't give
8. Old-fashioned person who if wants to get married wants to do it the right way and only way because marriage is a one-shot deal and only your first and only do don't blow it!!
9. Must be first and foremost a Christian. No ands, ifs, and/or buts
10. Must get along with my parents and me the same with his parents, families, relatives, etc
11. Treat others the way you like to be treated

choceo · Mar 30, 2004

Crono said:
I simply haven't met anyone I was interested in who was also interested in me. Sometimes I'm not sure if I ever will. I honestly try not to think about it too much because there is little I can do to change it.

Ginsu · Mar 30, 2004

I have three reasons perhaps:

1. It's not my time, still developing spiritually, emotionally, and mentaly.
2. I scare all the women away because I just guess i'm one of those scary type of persons.
3. I'm anti-social at times.

Katty · Mar 31, 2004

Jedi said:
Single, eh? Man, Im stumped. I cant quite figure out why Im single. Im a totally awesome guy, and aside from that sloppy passport photo I have scanned online, Im freaking hot. Of course, theres always a bigger fish, but Im pretty darn big. Curious as to why I havent been caught yet. Im also one of the most humble guys around, which further contributes to my awesomeness.

Joking aside, I really cant figure it out. The only thing I can think of that would possibly stand to reason is that when I was around 9 years old, I looked in the mirror one day and said Dang, Im hot. I dont think Im going to make it sexually to marriage. Right then, I prayed for God to let me make it to that point in spite of myself. Of course, a few years later, acne struck me like pepperonis on a pizza, and only now has it nearly faded away completely. Yep, those were rough times. Perhaps that was a blessing in disguise; kept safe from temptation by being handicapped with that physical disability, I mean. But now that thats over, I just cant figure out this whole Why am I still single business. Divine intervention in response to that 9-year-olds prayer? Yeah, Im stickin to that explanation. This has to be the work of God here.

Too funny Almost too cute! Ahh God works in mysterious ways.

For me, I've met an incredible guy () beyond words, but we're both doing our own thing, which is a good thing. He's got his priorities and I've got mine. Our daily personal walks come before anything else and we both know that. We live life as we know it and if things work out, thats awesome, but it'll happen under no pressures, no rushing, and therefore no mess-ups.

~Katty~

Justin04 · Mar 31, 2004

why are you still single? that is probably the single best question I have ever seen in my life. praise the lord for the question. seriuosly it made me evening as of now.

Why are you still single?

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