What is virginity?

memoriesbymichelle said:

It's not in the Bible. Here's a link about that very statement.

http://www.probe.org/content/view/555/47/

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Thanks for researching that Michelle. I knew where it wasn't, and the sin of Onan has been misinterpreted for years, probably always will be.

soccerdad66 said:

I understand what your trying to say, it's just not easy to state in a paragraph.

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Thanks and no it isn't easy to state in a paragraph.

memoriesbymichelle said:

It's not in the Bible. Here's a link about that very statement.

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well I have been corrected. and I apolagize and thank you very much for that. I learned something new today and a little embarassed but I still don't see that as changing my view on it. during touching yourself you will usually be lusting so it still falls under the sexual sin in my opinion but again it's an opinion take it for what it is.

Supplanter said:

You can take it in that context, but actually what I mean is this. If you sin against some one are you showing them love, no. Maybe most would no take it to the extrmeme of hating them, but if you do something wrogn to them then you cannot love them at the same time you are doing that. If you sin against yourself, are you showing yourself love? No, not at that moment you are not. The problem with sexual immorality is that is often an ongoing sin with major consequences. So, you ahve a constant sin in your life, so you are being constantly unloving toward yourself which pretty much leads to loathing. Most people who have been deeply involved with sexual immorality whether they are virgins or not, including myself, will tell you that continued failure in this area leads to serious problems with your own self-worth and self-love. You truly do begin to hate yourself the more you give in. It is hard to explain, but I am sure there are others here who have felt this self-loathing that takes hold of people involved in sexual immorality.

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I can attest to that. Good post, Supplanter!

die2live said:

I can attest to that. Good post, Supplanter!

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Thank you d2L!

Those who hold stigma's against non-virgins may want to think a little more.
An over emphasis on virginity in Afganistan has led to women prostitutes choose sodomy over more natural intercourse. That she is not valuable as a person without her virginity. It leads to a sad state of affairs. Particularly on issues of health where "the back passage" is more prone to tear (lack of natural lubrication) and to catch venereal disease. I won't go into graphic detail but I think the point has gotten through.

deliciousBass said:

I recently read an article about prostitution in Afghanistan. Apparently, many Afghani prostitutes only have anal sex in order to save their virginity for marriage. I don't get it.

What do you consider to be virginity? Are these Afghani "women of the night" virgins in your eyes? For those of you who only plan on marrying a virgin, does virginity only mean traditional intercourse?

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What is virginity is personally defined, in my opinion. That means there's no gold standard, no absolute answer, no right or wrong definition of it, and that it's going to differ depending on who you ask. My definition of virginity is that of someone who has had no sexual contact (penetration/insertion) with someone other than themselves (aka masturbation).

In my opinion, I wouldn't consider these Afghani women virgins. They've had sexual contact with another person. For me, if I were to marry (I don't plan on it due to the fact what I'm looking for is very rare), virginity means just like I said before: no sexual contact with another person other than themselves. I'm a virgin, by this definition, and since people marry those similar to themselves, it would make sense that I marry someone who shares this same view as I do. However, I'm aware of two things:

1) What I'm looking for (other than this) is rare and it really shrinks the dating pool for me.

2) I refuse to lower my standards (this definition) to raise someone else's. I strongly believe in this conviction of mine and that it is a Godly, Biblical standard.

That pretty much means my chances of marrying are slim and nil. Of course, this doesn't bother me anymore. I know how to be happy either way, be it single or in a relationship.

This is just my $0.02 on the matter, though. This is just what I decided on for my life. Take it or leave it.