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What does it mean to forgive?

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winterbluebells

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I have a girl who's supposedly my friend, but she talks about me behind my back, lies to me, takes advantage of me, and has upset me in lots of ways.
I do want to forgive her. But the thing is, if I imagine her as if she never hurt me, it would mean I wouldn't be wary. And because of what she's done so many times, and because she hasn't changed, I wouldn't trust her with my secrets.
Do I have to trust her with everything, to forgive her? Is forgiving imagining she never hurt me? Because I think if I trust her, she will hurt me again.
 

Criada

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Forgiving doesn't mean forgetting sweetie.
If you forgive someone, it means that you don't hold what they did against them, or want to 'get even' or punish them. It doesn't mean that you give them the opportunity to do the same again.
Keep yourself safe... and that also helps her not to do something wrong as well. You need to be aware that people can hurt you... being a Christian doesn't mean being a doormat
 
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spazlegs

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In addition to no longer carrying a grudge by not holding them to account, you also turn it over to God to deal with when you forgive.

Forgiveness does not mean that you should make yourself vulnerable to that person again. She has to earn your trust. If she doesn't and she still acts the same and hurts you deliberately, you have to re-evaluate whether she is your friend. You may just be able to be friendly to her, but not be able to be friends with her.
 
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