Gentlemen and women, please let me tell you a tale of a man of excess, a pleasure-seeker who reviled the law, good sense, and God himself, and thought only of his own enjoyment first and foremost, until he was providentially acquainted with the dire consequences of his wayward thinking. This is a tale of why scripture is to be of “no private interpretation” and why instruction in scripture and proper Christian forethought is vitally important. And why addiction to drugs renders a person into a bestial state.
When this man was 23, he became obsessed with a question, subconsciously posed to him by the Lord, perhaps: “what if there is a God?” He, for some reason, perhaps his upbringing by two law-abiding parents already firmly believed that the Holy Bible is God's Word. But, he believed this in much ignorance, having never actually cracked Scripture open. When he did so, he skipped to the end, reading the Book of Revelation first, and somehow got the false and slanderous idea in his head that God would prevent the realization of sin's existence in those under his wrath, that he would not allow them to repent even if they truly wished to, so great were the weight of their fornications and drunkenness. He didn't even read the Gospels, those great messages of the possibility of repentance and restoration, nor the Lord's promises therein, until many, many years later, after the consequences of his self-destructive orgy were upon him. He nearly died, both in body and spirit, but turned from his wickedness after the Lord's retribution of long-term madness and suffering was visited upon him several times. A caution against stiffed-necked hard-headedness, the revisiting of that dog's own vomit, against relapsing into addiction! And a caution against reviling the source of all that which is good in our lives - He whom we would have nothing, and be nothing, without.
This man became despondent, thinking the Lord a monster who's wrath outweighs his love. He fell into hard drinking, sometimes consuming more than a fifth of vodka a day. For eight years his misery continued; eventually, he nearly convinced himself that there is no God, no reward or punishment except oblivion. Not properly understanding Scripture, he sought solace in form of nihilism. Eventually, he got clean of alcohol and marijuana. The Lord was helping him, even as he considered the Lord an enemy or a non-existent entity. Truly, He does love, even while the wrongheaded individual thought he was God's enemy. He had become a reviler, but in his heart, he sought not to spread his beliefs. He well knew he could be wrong, and he still possessed some love for others. He still had not cracked the Gospel and read it. But he -had- convinced himself, to the point that he could function without liquor, that at least there was no chance of going to hell. He was wrong. The Lord had plans for him – in his drunkenness, he had repeatedly begged the Lord to speak to him, to give him a sign, for understanding; he effectively demanded the Lord justify himself, which was not a wise thing to do. The Lord is sovereign over all and does not need to justify Himself, especially to an arrogant, mouthy jackanapes who didn't have the good common sense not to revile the All-Powerful Creator. This sign actually came in a daily nagging feeling that the Holy Bible might be true, something he now praises and thanks God for giving him, even though he did not recognize it as the Lord's call of him out of his sins to study and worship and obedience. But he had responded with anger and wrath and curses and reviling of the Lord without even having truly seen the Lord's message. He cursed that which he claimed did not exist, yet his actions proved that in his heart he knew there was a God, but his ignorance and prejudice prevented him from truly giving the Lord a fair hearing or reading of Scripture. He had seen what he thought were monstrous atrocities done by the Lord, not knowing or ignoring the proper Scriptural and moral context nor knowing the wrongness of his thinking. He'd even studied at skeptical, anti-Christian websites, trying to fortify his unbelief and apostasy. But, he had barely even talked to any church-going Christians or ministers. There was only one at a college he had attended, and then but a bare single time.
Later on in life, after eight years as an unemployed alcoholic, he finally started to get his life back together, or so it seemed. He got off the drink and went back to school. He got a degree and a job, and things seemed to be looking up, even if he had convinced himself that there likely was no God and that oblivion was the likely fate of all, good or evil, faithful or not, Christian, or Jew, or unbeliever, or pagan. A blotting out of the conscious mind at death is what he thought all will face, regardless of their faith or works. He was, again, very wrong. Heaven and Hell are very real. Sinful ways lead to a foretaste of the latter as this tale attests. There is an inevitable, unavoidable future state of reward or punishment. Eventually, he got what he thought was his dream job – something he truly enjoyed and could sink his teeth into. He was being helped and rewarded by the Lord for his sobriety without his even realizing it. Or giving thanks – It took him a long time to add the paradigm of faith to his way of thinking. But then he encountered other drugs, harder drugs, and his lust and curiosity got piqued. So he tried one: methamphetamine.
What followed was the loss of his career, the loss of his happiness, his sanity, nearly the love of his family, two collapsed lungs, and a short stint in jail. Others have faced far worse – years in jail, turning into hardened criminals unable to be employed, nearly, even maybe the total loss of their sanity. Perhaps only the Lord's help and grace kept him from similar circumstances. He'd begun to hear voices – terrorizing, deceiving, devilish-seeming voices, that ate at his mind every time he got intoxicated, and for days or weeks thereafter. This lasted for over five years, day in and day out. For a long period, he had used methamphetamine daily. If you are unfamiliar with the long-term effects of hard drugs and alcohol upon the mind, I implore you to acquaint yourself with them, and to remember. The horrors as described in a medical journal or a D.A.R.E. class are a pale thing compared to the fear and terror of experiencing them first-hand. Not to mention the constant distraction while at work that can occur, possibly rendering the victim unable to work and forcing them into penury or onto public assistance and welfare. All of this came from reading Scripture improperly and reviling the God who only wishes for us to love him and to love each other with a proper respect for how we are to use our minds and bodies as intended by our creator. Hating God leads to self-hatred and self-destruction. For anyone who is reading this and seeks help in getting clean, look to Alcoholics Anonymous and Narcotics Anonymous. Both are good places to start – their philosophies rooted in repentance and helping others get clean. They helped the man of excess become a man of sobriety and forethought. And a man who helps others get clean as well. I pray that God helps you as He helped him.