So let's talk about it.

JulySheMustFly · Mar 13, 2008

Boy toys and girl toys

Are there such things?

Why? Why not?

Christdefinesme · Mar 13, 2008

Most of the time.

CelticRose · Mar 13, 2008

Care to clarify? I mean my boys might have played with Barbie but they would be most likely to decapitate her under enemy fire. Is it not more likely boys & girls play with the same toys differently?

Christdefinesme · Mar 13, 2008

CelticRose said:
Care to clarify? I mean my boys might have played with Barbie but they would be most likely to decapitate her under enemy fire. Is it not more likely boys & girls play with the same toys differently?

Ooooooh, good answer! I wish I came up with that one!

sparassidae · Mar 13, 2008

I agree with CelticRose- they do play with toys differently.

In relation to the original question: We have never restricted children to toys specific to their gender. So DS got a baby doll (when I was pg with #2) and loved it for a couple of years. He occasionally plays with tea sets (usually in the dirt ) and uses various dolls (from Action man to White witch) in his stories.

And for the flipside, our daughters have been bought tools, trainsets and cars. And they play with them sometimes, probably as much as the tea sets and dolls.

Obviously things like make up are pretty much restricted to girls (but we don't allow it anyway). Toy jewellery etc is not restricted, but is really only used by one of our children (DD #2). The others just aren't interested.

Obviously craft stuff, gardening things and lego aren't gender specific anyway, and they all love them.

Leanna · Mar 13, 2008

My opinion is some of the difference is inborn and if you act "natural" about it the boys act like boys and the girls act like girls...

By 1 year David was loving all things with wheels and driving them around and making car noises.... but Maya at the same age has absolutely no interest in cars at all, she seems to like a lot of what is considered "gender neutral" toys and also her baby doll, which she has tried to feed a bottle already....

At 3 David is in more of the pretend stage, he likes to pretend cook and set up all the Little People, and since he has a baby sister it seems natural to me that he should sometimes pretend with a baby doll that he's taking care of her. His daddy takes care of babies too.

So while there do seem to be some gender differences, they are not so wide as we are lead to believe through toy marketing and stuff...

I don't think its anything to worry about...

edit-- so basically I agree with everyone who posted before me, in case that wasn't clear

Linnis · Mar 13, 2008

I agree with Janet.

Although my son was 'driving' around things and making car sounds before his first toy car.

Neenie1 · Mar 13, 2008

Leanna said:
My opinion is some of the difference is inborn and if you act "natural" about it the boys act like boys and the girls act like girls...

By 1 year David was loving all things with wheels and driving them around and making car noises.... but Maya at the same age has absolutely no interest in cars at all, she seems to like a lot of what is considered "gender neutral" toys and also her baby doll, which she has tried to feed a bottle already....

At 3 David is in more of the pretend stage, he likes to pretend cook and set up all the Little People, and since he has a baby sister it seems natural to me that he should sometimes pretend with a baby doll that he's taking care of her. His daddy takes care of babies too.

So while there do seem to be some gender differences, they are not so wide as we are lead to believe through toy marketing and stuff...

I don't think its anything to worry about...

edit-- so basically I agree with everyone who posted before me, in case that wasn't clear

That sounds a little like my kids.

Ds loved cars, wheels anything to do with cars before 1 year old. He would even get boxes and things and "broom" them on the floor like a car before we got him his first toy car. Dd will play with cars, but it's not her preferred toy. At 1 year she mostly played with the neutral toddler toys, shape sorters, etc. She particularly loves soft toys and has always loved soft toys.

Ds will play with dd's dolls too, (probably at times more than dd does) he uses them in his cars/trucks etc. dd will play with the dolls in her doll house, and also will push her dolls around in the shopping trolley (toy one) that she has. Ds does play with dd's tea set and other toys like that. I don't know why it is they always seem to come in "pink" tones. Don't men eventually have to learn to cook too.

Admittedly in our home it is what some would call a "traditional" set up. Dad works full time, I do a little work here and there that I can take dd with me when I do it (it's babysitting work) so I do earn small amounts that certainly do help with day to day expenses but dh definitely is the main earner. But he does cook sometimes. (I just do it most of the time)

Birbitt · Mar 13, 2008

While I only have boys I have to say that I don't really restrict my boys to what one would call "boy" toys....if my boys go to someones house and are playing with a baby doll I'm not going to take it away and tell them boys don't play with dolls....however one night my son came out to me and proudly announced he was a princess...because he had on a sleeping shirt that was very long..he was only 2 and a half...so we explained that boys can be princes and girls can be princesses...now they both understand the difference.

Neenie1 · Mar 13, 2008

Birbitt said:
While I only have boys I have to say that I don't really restrict my boys to what one would call "boy" toys....if my boys go to someones house and are playing with a baby doll I'm not going to take it away and tell them boys don't play with dolls....however one night my son came out to me and proudly announced he was a princess...because he had on a sleeping shirt that was very long..he was only 2 and a half...so we explained that boys can be princes and girls can be princesses...now they both understand the difference.

ROFL. I had similar things to discuss with my son when he was 3 and I was pregnant with dd. He kept telling me after my baby came out of my tummy he was going to have one growning in his tummy ROFL. So we had to say only girls can be mummies and grow babies.

JustBoo · Mar 14, 2008

Short answer:

No.

Long Answer:

If my boy takes to toys that are typically 'boy toys' on his own that's fine , if my boy takes to typical ' girl toys' on his own , that's fine. If my daughter takes to typical 'girl toys' on her own that's fine , if my girl takes to typical 'boy toys' on her own that's fine.

I think it's silly that there is any divide and I don't -personally- beleive there should be. However , toys are definitely marketed towards boys and girls specifically and I find it annoying. I try to go for gender neutral everything. I don't buy Princess lego or Racing car dishes but just lego . . and . .dishes.

I think the obvious divide and the way the divide goes really shows how sexist and specifically misogynist our society still is.

Meshavrischika · Mar 14, 2008

JulySheMustFly said:
Boy toys and girl toys

Are there such things?

Why? Why not?

nope.

each child is different with different needs and interests.

labeling "girls toys" and "boys toys" is just a way to assign gender roles.

gengwall · Mar 14, 2008

CelticRose said:
Care to clarify? I mean my boys might have played with Barbie but they would be most likely to decapitate her under enemy fire. Is it not more likely boys & girls play with the same toys differently?

Yup!

Surrender2Win · Mar 14, 2008

JulySheMustFly said:
Boy toys and girl toys

Are there such things?

Why? Why not?

I guess I'll go against the PC answer and say, I think there are such things as boy toys and girl toys.

If I were to walk into a room that mostly consisted toys such as baby dolls and My Little Pony, I would assume it was a girls room because those are girlish kind of toys. If I were to walk into a room that mostly consisted toys such as cars, little army dudes and action figures, I would assume it was a boys room because those toys seem boyish.

In saying that...It doesn't bother me at all when my boys play with "girlish" toys...."girl or boy" toys doesn't mean they have to be limited to only playing with something pink or something blue.

jgonz · Mar 14, 2008

We have a variety of toys in the house and the boys and girls play with the same stuff Very differently.

jessesgirl · Mar 14, 2008

Leanna said:
My opinion is some of the difference is inborn and if you act "natural" about it the boys act like boys and the girls act like girls...

By 1 year David was loving all things with wheels and driving them around and making car noises.... but Maya at the same age has absolutely no interest in cars at all, she seems to like a lot of what is considered "gender neutral" toys and also her baby doll, which she has tried to feed a bottle already....

At 3 David is in more of the pretend stage, he likes to pretend cook and set up all the Little People, and since he has a baby sister it seems natural to me that he should sometimes pretend with a baby doll that he's taking care of her. His daddy takes care of babies too.

So while there do seem to be some gender differences, they are not so wide as we are lead to believe through toy marketing and stuff...

I don't think its anything to worry about...

edit-- so basically I agree with everyone who posted before me, in case that wasn't clear

Justin loves his cars and dinosaurs...but he loves to cuddle baby dolls too.

heart of peace · Mar 14, 2008

CelticRose said:
Care to clarify? I mean my boys might have played with Barbie but they would be most likely to decapitate her under enemy fire. Is it not more likely boys & girls play with the same toys differently?

This is something that would bother me and something I would redirect. Personally, I am perfectly ok with my son playing with toys that may seem controversial (i.e. toy guns) but I would teach him responsiblity for life (all life for that matter). I don't think it is ok to allow boys to treat life or things that represent life (i.e. dolls) so casually and somewhat coldly.

I also realize that at times, children use play time to work out aggressive energy and during those times, I believe my interaction is that much more necessary. I would allow him the space to be aggressive with the toy but I would also play with him and the toy I was playing with would "ask questions" and then I could come to understand what it is he is feeling.

Surrender2Win said:
I guess I'll go against the PC answer and say, I think there are such things as boy toys and girl toys.

If I were to walk into a room that mostly consisted toys such as baby dolls and My Little Pony, I would assume it was a girls room because those are girlish kind of toys. If I were to walk into a room that mostly consisted toys such as cars, little army dudes and action figures, I would assume it was a boys room because those toys seem boyish.

In saying that...It doesn't bother me at all when my boys play with "girlish" toys...."girl or boy" toys doesn't mean they have to be limited to only playing with something pink or something blue.

I agree. I was thinking that it certainly seems like there are girl toys and boy toys. One walk into Toys R Us proves this as the store has the "Girls" section set apart from the "Boys" section.

As for my opinion, as I said in the other thread, I am very flexible with what is and isn't ok for play things for my child. However, I encourage my son to play with boy toys and if I had a girl, I would steer her in the girl toys direction as well. Gender roles are something I am ok with.

So let's talk about it.

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