needs some help

Don't trust in your faith. Trust in Jesus.

OCDyeahyouknowme said:

Hey everyone, I just want to say that it is really cool that this site is here so people can come and talk about there ocd with other people that have. So I am gonna tell my story and hopefully there is someone out there who has had my problem and could give me some advice.

I have really been struggling with my “walk” with the Lord. I have fears of “is my faith from myself or is it from God” and “do I really want God or am I just into the religion” and stuff like that. When I try to pray I have a hard time focusing cause I have these thoughts that im not saved or if I try looking into a bible study, I have this deep feeling that instead of looking to mature in the Lord I should be looking into salvation. And that’s cool and all but there comes a time where I have to move on from elementary teaching. And it really is tough for me. I am so consumed by these thoughts that it takes up pretty much most of my time. I am currently in Iraq serving in the army and im so consumed by this that im noteven missing home cause I hav no time t think about it. I go to bed thinking about this stuff and dream about it and wake up thinking about it.
I also have this fear of “am I really looking to Christ or just a thought of something”. So confusing , hope someone can help

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welcome to the forum

let me say that i understand completelky what you are saying
i have been there .. praying for you

Dear Lord, please help OCDyeahyouknowme to find you amidst these struggles. Protect him with your mighty power and help him to be shielded by all of your armour and truth from the weapons of any enemy be it visible or not. I ask that you please shelter him beneath your wings and that he will find confidence and that his worries shall cease. Be his stronghold, his fortress. May he find your love and guide him through these obstacles to find a new breath of freedom in YOU. In Jesus name I pray. Glory be to God the father forever and ever. AMEN

Hi OCDyeah,
I'm glad you found this forum. Are you already diagnosed with OCD?
If not then I'd say that what you are describing is very typical of what many Christians with OCD go through. All the "what if's" and fear filled obsessional questions that plague you endlessly from morning till night are never satiated when they are driven by an over abundance of fight or flight emotions. Being in Iraq would certainly play a role in causing OCD to spike. It's an opportunistic disorder which usually strikes during extreme stess.
Trying to muster up or examine whether or not your feelings of faith in Christ are genuine will only lead to more anxiety. The more you try to gain that perfect feeling of reassurance the more fleeting it becomes.
The very fact that OCD has targeted your faith in Christ serves as evidence that you do have faith in Him and that your relationship with Him is deeply meaningful to you. If this were not so then OCD couldn't latch on to it in order to get you obsessing.
The compulsive side of this type of OCD are the mental activities of, checking for reassurance, debating with or trying to solve the doubts and questions and ruminating endlessly about them. The more those of us with OCD engage in these activites the more frightening and stuck the obessional themes become.
I know it's hard but the only way to fight OCD is to not fight with it.
Maybe you already know these things from dealing with it in your past but thought I'd pass them on just in case this is new to you.
Hope you'll spend some more time on the forum. They're are wonderfully encouraging people here who know and understand your mental pain. We get each other.
I'll be praying for you and I want to say a huge thankyou for your service to our country.
Keep in touch.
Mitzi



I have really been struggling with my “walk” with the Lord. I have fears of “is my faith from myself or is it from God” and “do I really want God or am I just into the religion” and stuff like that. When I try to pray I have a hard time focusing cause I have these thoughts that im not saved or if I try looking into a bible study, I have this deep feeling that instead of looking to mature in the Lord I should be looking into salvation. And that’s cool and all but there comes a time where I have to move on from elementary teaching. And it really is tough for me. I am so consumed by these thoughts that it takes up pretty much most of my time. I am currently in Iraq serving in the army and im so consumed by this that im noteven missing home cause I hav no time t think about it. I go to bed thinking about this stuff and dream about it and wake up thinking about it.
I also have this fear of “am I really looking to Christ or just a thought of something”. So confusing , hope someone can help[/quote]

i just love it when you post mitzi.... you are sooo right about everything you said!!!!!!!

pjspara said:

i just love it when you post mitzi.... you are sooo right about everything you said!!!!!!!

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Thank you so much PJ! This forum is both a God send and a blessing to me. If anything I say helps just one person with their OCD I count it as an enormous priviledge to have encouraged them.
God Bless,
Mitzi