Marriage under God and not by Law/State, possible or impossible?

AgileFeet said:

It's not me that's stopping me from getting a license, it's the fiance who doesn't want to get the license right now but in the future, and Wedding doesn't = Marriage. I assume you already know this.
God Bless

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Yes, but you get get a license, go to the court house, then save up your pennies for the big wedding/reception...or somethin'.

Though speaking as an old married lady, watch out for those chicks that just want a wedding. They think they want to be married, but really they just need you to stand there in a tux for a couple of hours and help pay for the honeymoon to someplace fabulous. Be aware!

AgileFeet said:

It's not me that's stopping me from getting a license, it's the fiance who doesn't want to get the license right now but in the future

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Level with us. Who's the one (you or the fiancee) that's convinced the other that living together can be passed off as a de facto marriage?

thats right,,,,in fact NO-ONE is prevented to get married in Gods Eyes ( even tho some may say otherwise )...its between two loving hearts ..GOD BLESS <3 <3 <3 <3

SuziTiri said:

thats right,,,,in fact NO-ONE is prevented to get married in Gods Eyes ( even tho some may say otherwise )...

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...unless, of course, you follow scripture...

Needless to say, if you don't follow scripture, then do whatever you like.

Hospes said:

...unless, of course, you follow scripture...

Needless to say, if you don't follow scripture, then do whatever you like.

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Yes, the scripture does put limitations on who you should marry. If you are an Israelite, you should not marry a foreigner.

Avniel said:

I don't think there are two marriages but I think there should be. The bible tells us to obey the laws of the land, but it doesn't tell us not to fight for what we believe is right.

This reminds me of slaves, that would jump over a broom to state that they were married. I do not think that these slaves were shacking up even though it was illegal for slaves to marry.

I don't even know where my marriage certifacte is but I do have the broom we jumped hanging up in my living room. If we didn't jump the broom I don't think I would feel like I was married. The bible says what so ever a man thinkth so is he. The jumping the broom was my marriage certicate and it had nothing to do with the government.

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This is EXACTLY what I thought about when I saw OP's questions - the Slaves. They were forbidden by white man's law to marry but they believed God honored their love and they married anyways. I believe God honored every single one of those marriages.

I also thought about the movie "Braveheart"...I know...I know but it also makes the point that God supercedes the law when the law is evil.

Also don't quote me on this but I remember hearing something a while back about the largest number of people living together were Senior Citizens. It was something about losing benefits if they married...I think. So yeah I could see them getting "married under God". Okay whose gonna beat up the Seniors? LOL I'm just saying....

quietpraiyze said:

This is EXACTLY what I thought about when I saw OP's questions - the Slaves. They were forbidden by white man's law to marry but they believed God honored their love and they married anyways. I believe God honored every single one of those marriages.

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If there were an equivalent of the slave situation in our society today, you might have a point. There isn't, however.

That point was addressed earlier.

I remember hearing something a while back about the largest number of people living together were Senior Citizens. It was something about losing benefits if they married...I think.

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So yeah I could see them getting "married under God". Okay whose gonna beat up the Seniors? LOL I'm just saying....

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They're pretending NOT to be married so that they can defraud the government. Would you like to use a better example?

Albion said:

If there were an equivalent of the slave situation in our society today, you might have a point. There isn't, however.

That point was addressed earlier.



They're pretending NOT to be married so that they can defraud the government. Would you like to use a better example?

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Many cannot defraud the government if they try to they cannot even pretend to be married legally...

SuziTiri said:

Many cannot defraud the government if they try to they cannot even pretend to be married legally...

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Of course we were both talking only about those who do, not those who do not.

Defrauding the government doesn't make a marriage null and void, though.

If I marry a guy that I met yesterday who is here on a visa solely to keep him in the country, then yes, we have both defrauded the government, but we have not defrauded God. My foreign hubby might get himself deported, but that doesn't cancel our marriage vows. God's gonna hold us to them.

Likewise, if a couple of old folks decide to get every cent they can from social security and commit to each other in front of God and man, but don't trouble with the paperwork, then they have defrauded the government. But God still holds them to their vows.

They may be sheisters, but they are married sheisters.

seeingeyes said:

Defrauding the government doesn't make a marriage null and void, though.

If I marry a guy that I met yesterday who is here on a visa solely to keep him in the country, then yes, we have both defrauded the government, but we have not defrauded God. My foreign hubby might get himself deported, but that doesn't cancel our marriage vows. God's gonna hold us to them.

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You don't think getting married for nefarious purposes would not negate your supposedly "holy" vows? How are the "holy" if you had the ulterior motive of keeping him "legal" (which, but the way, ICE would consider fraud and therefore illegal)?

IisJustMe said:

You don't think getting married for nefarious purposes would not negate your supposedly "holy" vows? How are the "holy" if you had the ulterior motive of keeping him "legal" (which, but the way, ICE would consider fraud and therefore illegal)?

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Nefarious people have been getting married since the beginning of creation. If nefariousness voided out our vows, then who would be married? If there is any 'holiness' to our vows at all, it comes from the God who we are accountable to in our marriage, not from our own good (or bad) intentions.

seeingeyes said:

Nefarious people have been getting married since the beginning of creation. If nefariousness voided out our vows, then who would be married?

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About 97% of the people who took wedding vows. Or do you think every marriage ceremony is based on lies and falsehoods?

seeingeyes said:

If there is any 'holiness' to our vows at all, it comes from the God who we are accountable to in our marriage, not from our own good (or bad) intentions.

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God will not honor a "marriage" based on a lie, or subterfuge.

IisJustMe said:

About 97% of the people who took wedding vows. Or do you think every marriage ceremony is based on lies and falsehoods?God will not honor a "marriage" based on a lie, or subterfuge.

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He might not 'honor' it, but he sure will uphold it. Or can we just say our vows with our fingers crossed so that we won't be guilty of adultery later?

it saddens me that some people cannot get married at all yet some people get married to defraud or some get married and divorced ten times.....some just want to have the chance to get married for love and can't even do that while others lie and can get legally get married MAKES ME SO SAD

seeingeyes said:

He might not 'honor' it, but he sure will uphold it. Or can we just say our vows with our fingers crossed so that we won't be guilty of adultery later?

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Don't worry about adultery later. Worry about lies, subterfuge, fraud and misrepresentation now.

seeingeyes said:

Defrauding the government doesn't make a marriage null and void, though.

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That is correct, but the elderly who were mentioned are those who are defrauding the government by not marrying although they live together and consider themselves married, so it's not much of an example to use in this discussion.

If I marry a guy that I met yesterday who is here on a visa solely to keep him in the country, then yes, we have both defrauded the government, but we have not defrauded God. My foreign hubby might get himself deported, but that doesn't cancel our marriage vows.

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That is correct.

Likewise, if a couple of old folks decide to get every cent they can from social security and commit to each other in front of God and man, but don't trouble with the paperwork, then they have defrauded the government. But God still holds them to their vows.

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They haven't taken vows.

In religion, to take a vow is to solemnize a promise. If it's done in secret it's not solemnized. For instance, if a religious order of sisters or brothers, has "simple vows," so called, they can be dispensed with later if the party changes his mind. But if they are "solemn" vows, they are considerd binding, very much like matrimonial vows.

AgileFeet said:

It's not me that's stopping me from getting a license, it's the fiance who doesn't want to get the license right now but in the future, and Wedding doesn't = Marriage. I assume you already know this.
God Bless

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You have asked a theoretical question and you have gotten theoretical answers, some say 'yes' and back it up with scripture, some say 'no' and back it up with scripture, and we are all brothers and sisters in Christ. Maybe I'm wrong (and a far-out hippy!), and I'll have to learn better. But my hope is in Christ, not in my own rightness.

But here's the problem: You are not in a theoretical situation, you are in a real life situation. And real life situations have real life people who react in real life ways.

You say that your fiance doesn't think that the two of you should get married until you have 'enough' (whatever that means to her). Well guess what, until the two of you have 'enough' she is not going to consider herself married to you.

She might, with enough coercion, decide to go ahead and get married 'in God's eyes' before getting married 'for real', but that won't change the fact that until that wedding happens, she won't feel married 'for real'.

Right now, your love for her is all sunshine and bunnies, and she, no doubt, thinks that you are the bee's knees. You guys are invincible, absolutely immune to whatever it is that causes all these other poor souls to split up. It's a wonderful feeling and you should savor your crazy love for each other.

But it gets crazier. At some point, the real world starts moving in on you, and you are gonna have to start truly sacrificing one for another. It's hard. This is when the sunshine and bunnies hit the fan. And it ain't pretty.

This is why half of the people you know decide to 'shack up' instead of getting married, and this is why some of your peers are already divorced. Do you think they didn't really mean that thing about 'till death do us part'? They did mean it. They just couldn't back it up with the soul-stretching work that love requires.

So what happens when the bee's knees start getting creaky, and your fiance tells you, "this was a mistake, we shouldn't have done this", and she packs her bags and she leaves? You will have suddenly gone from a 'husband' to an 'ex-boyfriend' in the course of one conversation.

You may know that God takes your vows seriously even without the white dress and the paperwork, but she does not, no matter how cute she thinks you are right now.

Be careful that you don't find yourself in a marriage of one.