My bf and I just got into a heated argument. My bf is the son of a southern baptist preacher and he feels the calling to the ministry also, possibly as the youth director, but he currently serves as the college and career minister.
Tonight we had dinner with his brother and 2 other couples in our ministry. One of the couples is a possiblity for church membership, the other he is trying to win. The latter couple have not been the easiest to get along with. The guy has stabbed my bf in the back many times and is rude a lot, but my bf is still trying to reach him. Dinner seemed to go well, but on the way home he made some "light-hearted" jokes about the other couples. Now I'll readily admit that this couple is a bit on the weird side, but I still got upset that my bf made a "jokingly" negative comment about them.
I told him that it made him seem like a hypocrite because here he is saying that he cares about these people, but then he makes sarcastic comments about them. Am I over-reacting?? I mean, I'll readily admit that this isn't the first couple on my list for get-togethers, but I just don't think it's right to say you really care about people and then make fun of them later. I told him that it bothers me because it weakens his testimony towards me and worst of all makes me feel different towards those people (ie: now whenever I see them I'll think about whatever was said about them).
Then my bf went into this whole thing about the ministry...how we're all just human...and that he was completely joking and that I just don't get his sense of humor. And then he threw in this whole thing about how I don't understand what it's like because all I'm doing is sitting in the sidelines and pointing out mistakes instead of helping.
Maybe I don't understand. It's like I've always looked from the outside-in, but now all of a sudden I'm looking from the inside-out and it's not all roses on this side. I mean, this whole pastor's family thing is very new to me and I'm all of a sudden being exposed to the deceitful and unchristian acts of other church members.
Please help me to understand. I'm especially interested to hear points of view from those of you who were pastors, pk's, deacons, etc. because I want understand my bf's side.
Tonight we had dinner with his brother and 2 other couples in our ministry. One of the couples is a possiblity for church membership, the other he is trying to win. The latter couple have not been the easiest to get along with. The guy has stabbed my bf in the back many times and is rude a lot, but my bf is still trying to reach him. Dinner seemed to go well, but on the way home he made some "light-hearted" jokes about the other couples. Now I'll readily admit that this couple is a bit on the weird side, but I still got upset that my bf made a "jokingly" negative comment about them.
I told him that it made him seem like a hypocrite because here he is saying that he cares about these people, but then he makes sarcastic comments about them. Am I over-reacting?? I mean, I'll readily admit that this isn't the first couple on my list for get-togethers, but I just don't think it's right to say you really care about people and then make fun of them later. I told him that it bothers me because it weakens his testimony towards me and worst of all makes me feel different towards those people (ie: now whenever I see them I'll think about whatever was said about them).
Then my bf went into this whole thing about the ministry...how we're all just human...and that he was completely joking and that I just don't get his sense of humor. And then he threw in this whole thing about how I don't understand what it's like because all I'm doing is sitting in the sidelines and pointing out mistakes instead of helping.
Maybe I don't understand. It's like I've always looked from the outside-in, but now all of a sudden I'm looking from the inside-out and it's not all roses on this side. I mean, this whole pastor's family thing is very new to me and I'm all of a sudden being exposed to the deceitful and unchristian acts of other church members.
Please help me to understand. I'm especially interested to hear points of view from those of you who were pastors, pk's, deacons, etc. because I want understand my bf's side.