It's official.

I just got this email from my attorney.

I telephoned to let you know that the divorce was granted and we were mailing the final Judgment of divorce to you.

In case you're wondering how I feel at the moment: mostly drowsy. I got up to go the bathroom and get a bowl of oat meal then return for more sleep for my overnight work shift tonight. While eating I went online. I also sense a bit of relief. I am going to recliner for more . Lastly, I feel a little sad.

God, my dear Lord, I did not want this.

Annessa3,

Thank you for sharing!! I am saddened you are in a similar boat as me. It really sucks having a divorce forced on you . It is a week since I got the divorce judgment and I still say "God, I did not want this." And yes, it is what it is.

Please, please keep me/us posted. You're in my prayers.

Hugs and prayers to you!

Annessa3,

Thank you.

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momeezy,

My heart breaks for you, as well. You are also at the 11 year point. I was two months shy of 11 years when my ex said she wanted a divorce. We did not have a children. I do, though, know your hurt. The last year of my marriage and everything surrounding the divorce--I too can say I no longer know my wife.

I just emailed a reply to my cousin. I shared with her my prayer offering to Silent Unity for my wife. (I had the original thought of doing it a few days ago, didn't get around to doing it, then got that nagging feeling to do it; I semi-jokingly say it was God nagging me to write it.) My cousin said she sensed a hurt in the prayer. I said of course there is still a hurt. It's only fifteen months since my wife dropped the "D" bomb on me. My marriage break up involves her, her brother and his wife, mysterious betrayal--it's not your usual adultery or--God forbid--domestic violence. I had lots of questions. Since I decided to forgive her and her relatives I lost the need for the answers. Perhaps God will give me--and you--the answers. I am submitting to His plans.

Don't loose faith. Don't stop praying. People will run either to or away from God during bad times. Run to Him.

Psalm 147:3: He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.

I am not sure if it's right or wrong but I try to look at others who have it worse off, meaning who have been married longer than you and I. There was a recent shooting attempt in Georgia and a woman who worked at the school--so ironically cool: her last name was Tuff --talked the guy into surrendering. It was later learned that she had just broken up with her husband of 33 years. That is exactly three times longer than me. I wonder how she is doing.

As I have been wisely told, "take it one day at a time."

Annessa3,

Wow, you are still in the same house?!

Prayers are definitely covered.

If I do not get back to you--or any one else--right away, please do not take offense. It is my work schedule. It does not offer much of a personal life or time. Even if my marriage was in tact, I wouldn't see my wife much. I am believing God has a better, more 9-5ish job for me in the new year.

dayhiker said:

I didn't want my divorce either when it happened 7 yrs ago. Tho I was most of the case for it.

Once it was obvious that it wasn't going to turn around, I set my heart to learn what God wanted to teach me and that I was on a new adventure. I've learned a lot, much about communication that I needed desperately to learn. This past year I've felt more love from my friends than I every have in my life. So there is good things on the other side of divorce. God is so good, so I say go for your next life, build what God wants for you.

That's not to say this will take away the pain immediately. It still takes time.

Click to expand...

Great pearls of wisdom, dayhiker.
It helps me.

savedbygracebre,

I am sorry you have to go through this.

Peace, and healing, will come on their own based, I believe, on our individuality. We are all individuals with different personalities. We are affected by trauma, negativity, etc. in different ways. Thus we recover in different ways and at different paces. I used to work on Wall Street and on 9/11 I saw the second tower get hit and experienced that horrific day. I never got PTSD. Others did. The same thing with divorce.

I offer you, saved, and everyone else the following Psalms which helped/continue to help me.

147:3

62:5

130:5