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Is it appropriate to pray for this?

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Mainliner

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I am 34 and single and never married. In fact, I have never so much as had a girlfriend. I am shy, I am timid around women and perhaps just a little socially awkward. I can't seem to muster the strength or the confidence (or the luck) to find a romantic partner. I have a good job and career, but this is just something that I am not very good at.

I would like to get married someday, but as I see more and more people my age and even younger getting married and having children, I feel like that opportunity is slipping away from me.

My question is if it is acceptable to pray that I might find a female companion sometime soon. I believe it is wrong to pray for selfish and materialistic things, but I wonder if praying for a romantic life with a woman would be acceptable.

If it's God's will that I be single all my life, so be it, but that's still a rather disturbing thought to me.
 
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tturt

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Yes it's fine to pray for a wife and I would describe the desired characteristics - (though you know the old saying be careful what you pray for).

Scriptural basis - There were women who prayed for children and sometimes they stated specifics such as male children. Plus in Hannah's case she promised back him back to Yahweh for his entire life so certain characteristics would be necessary. Also, she vowed that he wouldn't cut his hair. I know this is a component of the Nazarite vow but it isn't stated like was in Samson's case. (Females could take the Nazarite vow too).
 
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LWB

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Hi Mainliner, and welcome to the forum.

If a person has the means to obtain food, either by growing it or getting a job to buy it, would it be wrong for them to simply pray for food and expect manna from heaven?

I suggest it depends upon your own effort and determination whether you find a wife or not. If you are willing to put the work in to overcome your shyness and social awkwardness, of putting yourself out there to meet people, then I think God will give you the grace to achieve what you want. Instead of praying for a wife, pray for the overcoming of the obstacles in your way of finding a wife.

If you really want a wife, you will stop at nothing to find her. There are plenty of women out there. If it all seems like too much work, then maybe a more simple life is what you really desire. In that case you need to forget what society values and accept who you are.

I'm single and laugh at the idea of being incomplete. Some people are simply born without the need for marriage and family.
 
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St_Worm2

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Hey Mainliner, I think it's more than acceptable for you to pray to God to help you find a wife, I think He expects you to ..

One catch though, you truly need to surrender to His will concerning this, fully trusting that His will for you is perfect, whether it's to get married or remain single for a time (or a lifetime). You know, the funny thing is, I was right where you are now, and it wasn't until I finally and truly trusted God with my future, that my future wife finally came into my life. I was 30 then and we were married about a year and a half later when I was 32.

BTW, surrendering your will to Him does not mean that you're supposed to stop asking Him for what you feel you need or desire, you just need to trust that in the end, He does know what's best for you .. Make your life God-centered and the rest will all fall in place!

Yours and His,
David

"Delight yourself in the Lord;
And He will give you the desires of your heart"
Psalm 37:4​
 
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chilehed

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Hello, Mainliner, welcome to the forums.

There are some who are called to a celibate life, and many who are not. I'm sure that God would be pleased if you poured out your heart to him about this and told him what you want. I'm sure that he would be even more pleased if you asked him at the same time for the grace to wish for His will rather than your own, and to grow into the kind of man who would be worthy of (and desired by) the kind of woman he might want for you.

Do this every day, and leave the results up to him.
 
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singpeace

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Mainliner,

It is absolutely God's will that you find a wonderful wife. He said in Genesis "It is not good for man to be alone." God created marriage. It is a good thing to pray for. Here is a prayer that I found regarding finding a mate.

Heavenly Father I come before you far from perfect, and I believe you in your word where it says that you will be faithful and just to cleanse me from all unrighteousness if I confess my sins to you. God even as I pray this, I stand in faith where you say that you will answer our prayers, that we can ask anything in your will and you will supply it. God I know that if I seek your righteousness and kingdom you will add all other things unto me.

So God I ask as I seek you may you add unto me my mate, today, I pray for a help meet, a wife that will be my partner not only in love and life, but also in you. Father I pray we will always keep you first so that we will be pleasing to you on our wedding. Father I pray that you hear me and know me, that you know my needs and weaknesses and strengths, Father in my heart I pray that the one you have for me will complete my needs, and I will complete the needs of my future wife.

There are many scriptures referring to your ideas and plan for marriage and I have faith in you and your word, that a man shall be joined to his wife and we shall be one flesh. That I will honor and love my wife. That a man must love his wife and a woman respect her husband.God it says that a wife does not belong to herself nor does a husband belong to himself but that they belong to one another, and I say amen, Let your will be done Father, your word says that the wife must submit to the husband and the husband give up his life for his wife, so I will.

Father may your word be the foundation upon which this marriage is built, God hates divorce, and that will never be a option, God I understand the sanctity of the marriage bed, because it is there that the marriage, the joining of flesh actually occurs, not the ceremony and paperwork done before man, we shall be one flesh under you.

God I thank you now, knowing you hear me and will honor my prayer, for you said it is not good to be alone. God I bow my head to worship you and lift your name to praise you, and I pray this all in Jesus Name, Amen Amen Amen.
 
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Sketcher

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"He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the LORD." - Proverbs 18:22

Proverbs is full of advice on what makes a good wife and what makes a bad wife - there is no reason to believe that praying for a good wife and not a bad one would be sinful in the least.
 
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heymikey80

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Yes, plus a little advice.

Lots of people would appreciate your views and opinions. Share.

And look around. Once you start running after Christ, look to the left or the right. Someone might be close by you for a reason. It could even be someone you never thought about before. Well. Think.
 
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insurchoftruth

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Brother;

All our needs, financial, material, spiritual, needs for love, food, clothes and sex, are first of all God's idea and God's design and desire! He even thought that it is NOT good for Adam to be alone and provided him with Eve.
Because God created us to be with needs, therefore, he also cares to provide for our needs.

It is absolutely NOT wrong to pray for your material needs! Look at the Lord's prayer given in Matthew 6:11, that Jesus showed to the disciples how to pray. He mentioned a material need - bread.

God loves you so much, and therefore because of his love and care for you, he as a heavenly Father, wants to provide for ALL your material needs, including a marriage partner. Look at Matthew 7:9,10,11

Also, look in Proverbs 18:22 which says that who finds a wife finds a good thing.


1 John 3:1, 4:10,16,19, John 3:16, 14:21,23, 16:27, 17:23,26, Psalm 103:8,11,13,17,18, Psalm 108:4, Psalm 63:3, Psalm 145:7,8,9,17,20, Psalm 147:11, Psalm 52:8, Titus 3:4,5, Lamentations 3:22,23,25,31,32,33, Psalm 31:16,19,21, Psalm 33:5,18,22

Genesis 1:29, Psalm 103:5, Matthew 6:3,4,11, 25-34, Ephessians 4:28, Psalm 25:13, Acts 20:34, 1 Peter 5:7, Psalm 34:9,10, Psalm 33:19, Psalm 37:19, 25, Psalm 84:11
 
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Mainliner

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OP here. I said a prayer this morning asking that I find a great wife someday. I also promised God that I would pledge myself to being the best possible husband, and father if I should have kids.

 
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