Irishman, Mexican and a Redneck

An Australian, an Irishman and an Englishman were sitting in a bar. There was only one other person in the bar. The three men kept looking at this other man, for he seemed terribly familiar. They stared and stared, wondering where they had seen him before, when suddenly the Irishman cried out, "My God, I know who that man is. It's Jesus!"
The others looked again and, sure enough, it was Jesus himself, sitting alone at a table. The Irishman calls out, "Hey! Hey, you! Are you Jesus?"
The man looks over at him, smiles a small smile and nods his head.” Yes, I am Jesus" he says.
The Irishman calls the bartender over and says to him "I'd like you to give Jesus over there a pint of Guinness from me." So the bartender pours Jesus a Guinness and takes it over to his table. Jesus looks over, raises his glass, smiles thank you and drinks.

The Englishman then calls out, "Er, excuse me Sir, but are you Jesus?"
Jesus smiles and says, "Yes, I am Jesus." The Englishman beckons the bartender and tells him to send over a pint of Newcastle Brown Ale for Jesus, which the bartender duly does. As before, Jesus accepts the drink and smiles over at the men.

Then the Australian calls out, "Hey! Are you Jesus?" Jesus nods and says, "Yes, I am Jesus." The Australian is mighty impressed and has the bartender send over a pot of VB for Jesus, which he accepts with pleasure.

Some time later, after finishing the drinks, Jesus leaves his seat and approaches the three men. He reaches for the hand of the Irishman and shakes it, thanking him for the Guinness. When he lets go, the Irishman gives a cry of amazement. "Oh God, the arthritis is gone," he says. The arthritis I've had for years is gone. It's a miracle!"

Jesus then shakes the hand of the Englishman, thanking him for the Newcastle Brown Ale. Upon letting go, the Englishman's eyes widen in shock.” By Jove," he exclaims, "The migraine I've had for over 40 years is completely gone. It's a Miracle!"

Jesus then approaches the Australian, who has a terrified look on his face.

"Back off, mate. I'm on compo".

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oncelost said:

An Irishman with a cane limps into a bar and says to the bartender, "Is that Jesus, my Lord and Savior, at the end of the bar?"

The bartender replies, "Yes, I think it is."

The Irishman says, "Well send him a shot your best Irish whiskey, and put it on my tab."

Moments later, a Mexican walks in on crutches, and says, "Is that Jesus, the Holy son of Mary?," to which the bartender nodded. "Well, give him a shot of your best Tequilla on me," he said.

Later, a redneck walks in, holding his lower back, and says, "Is that that the Son of God?" . . . "Well, send him a Pabst Blue Ribbon, on me."

Later, the man at the end of the bar gets up, walks over to the Irishman, touches him on the forehead and says, "Thank you for your kind deed. For that, you are healed." The Irishman threw down his cane, jumped up and said, "Thank you, Lord!"

Jesus, walked over to the Mexican, and likewise touched his forehead and said, "For your generous heart, you are healed." The Mexican threw down his crutches, danced, and said, "Thank you, Jesus! Thank you, Jesus!"

Then, Jesus walked over to the redneck, who suddenly said, "Not so fast Jesus. I just got my disability approved!"

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