I feel like I'm going to hell

I read in 1Peter1:6-7 and again in chapter 4:12 that there is a testing time which seems like a "fiery ordeal" to test or prove your faith.

I'm either going through that or I am already being judged for my sins. My prayer won't get through, I feel like I'm going to hell. In fact I feel like I'm already in it. My mind is OCD on religion and spiritual issues. It's focused on the Law instead of Christ, as much as I want it to be all about Christ (since He fulfilled the Law). I feel condemned so strongly my faith is so small and my nerves are ready to snap.

I also have a mental disorder (schizoaffective bipolar type) which could be playing a part in all this.

And my sins are over my head, as David writes in Psalm 38:4. Wow I'm reading the whole chapter of Psalm 38, and it applies to me. Maybe this is where I need to read from. It's just that I've felt this way for too long. Not a few weeks, or a few years, but for 22 years I've felt similar to this. My nerves are on edge.

Your in an spiritual battle with your emotions, the war is tiresome but everyday is a new day for victory. We are all guilty so do not shame from past sins bring you down. We are not to rejoice in our own goodness but in the goodness of Jesus. Its because we believe he is the perfect Son of God that we are all saved. Keep seeking him and trusting in his power not your own and he forgives you. I will be praying for you, God bless!

I know this will probably be little help, but do not go by what you feel. Feelings come and go, and with a mental disorder they do that easily and strongly. But your faith should not stand in what you feel, only what He has said.

So what has He said?

"Though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be white as snow."
"Repent and be baptized every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the remission of sins."
"My child, these things I write unto you," This is written in 1 John and it is written to Christians. The things written that it speaks of is sin and our need to avoid sin. So He says I tell you about your sin for the following purpose: "that you sin not. BUT IF YOU DO SIN, you have an advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ."

Then you may ask, how many times will He forgive?

He says this in Luke 17 (my paraphrase):
If you sin against me I will rebuke you, but if you turn to me and repent when I do so I will forgive you. And if you sin 7 times and turn back 7 times I will forgive you. As long as you turn to me I will forgive you always.

I would like to point out some things that I observed from reading your post:

1. Your name: Christownsme. If this is a true statement then you must understand that hell is an impossible place for you to go.

2. Your small faith: Matthew 7:20 said that if you have faith—even as small as a mustard seed—“nothing will be impossible for you.” Our justification isn’t based upon how much faith we have, but rather in the person of our faith: Jesus Christ. Do you have (small) faith in the work of Christ for salvation? Great, you’re Heaven bound!

3. Your mental condition: I can’t even pretend to know what you are going through, but from what I have read you are struggling with a major disorder. Since it is a mental condition, I thought about a verse that might be worth meditating on: “And take the helmet of salvation…” (Ephesians 6:10-20; see verse 17). This passage is where Paul is talking about putting on the full armor of God, and trust me, we all need the whole set! But for your situation, consider the helmet that is worn to protect your head (mind). When the voices of the evil one come your way, keep in mind that salvation is complete in the work Christ has done for you. Make yourself some kind of a helmet picture to remind you of this when you are under attack.

4. Your fiery trial: All I can say to this is perhaps that the hotter the fire the more proven and pure the gold. Brother, keep in mind “the outcome of your faith, the salvation of your soul” (1 Peter 1:9).

5. Psalm 38: Keep in mind that while his wounds “stink and fester,” David continued to wait for the Lord and trusted him to answer (17). It sure does seem like it takes forever for answers to come when we are desperate for them! But remember, God loves you and his time is always perfect.

I will be praying for you. May God make his presence known to you and always keep your faith strong.

Yours in Christ,
John

Faith is also trust. You must trust God and Jesus, before they're ready to trust you.

I have a mental problem too. However mine started with using ouija boards. I started hearing voices, and was diagnosed with schizophrenia. I know what it's like to suffer mentally...I have not yet been able to have my symptoms controlled with medication, however I do spend time with God and a lot of times while i'm in his presence, My symptoms completely disappear.

What I recommend is that before you praise God, or pray, simply say..."Lord I come into your presence" Then you are in his presence. Tell him you are suffering and need help...and continue to praise him because I've found praising him can work wonders.

There are very few things you can do to wreck your relationship with the Lord, I once thought i blasphemed the holy spirit, but come to find out...i did not...I learned that it has to be in your heart to walk away from him.

So just spend more time in his presence...and praise him and pray. I suggest also if you don't have the baptism of the holy spirit you get that too..and pray in the spirit.
-Katy

If you have any questions, or i can help you out in any other way, pm me.

I particularly agree with the advice about not trusting solely on your feelings to determine your spiritual fate. The Bible tells us not to lean upon our own understanding (but to trust in God instead). In other words, even when we feel we are being rational and logical, we still can't rely on that - how much more so when we are trusting in our feelings and emotions! (It's like playing chess vs the computer; no matter how well thought out your tactics and strategy may be, you soon find out there was still a better move out there somewhere!)

There is no condemnation for those of us in Christ Jesus. (Romans 8:1) God convicts us, by speaking to our conscience to show what we have done wrong; but also offering a solution for us to make things right. Condemnation without a solution is of the devil, and we must reject it. Don't let Satan tell you you're going to Hell, when, through Christ, it doesn't need to be that way!

We all battle with condemnation and feelings of doubt at times. It can impact on our lives quite deeply in fact. But Jesus didn't come to condemn us, but to save us. That's what it says in the Bible. (John 3:17)

Rather than believing the devil's lies about you going to hell, why not spend more time in God's Word instead, building yourself up in your faith. Try to "take every thought captive", and rebuke the devil whenever thoughts of condemnation come up.

Finally, remember that Jesus really is the solution to our every problem, the solution to our deepest needs. His teachings are truly good news for us - they are life! We need to spend time meditating and practicing His teachings, which will help us move away from the chains of condemnation, and unto the glorious and abundant life which God would truly have for us.

Best of luck!

Doubt regarding salvation is something that almost every true believer has to struggle with from time to time. Part of the problem is that the Devil lies to us constantly. Part of the problem is that we still have a sinful nature and sometimes we sin and that causes us to question whether we really have a new nature. Sometimes we think that faith is a feeling instead of a belief and a trust in Christ. The answer to these doubts is to look to the promises of God. My favorite one is Revelation 22:17 "whoever desires let him take of the water of life freely". Notice that the verse says whoever. Whoever covers a lot of people does it not? Next the one qualifier. Whoever desires. Whoever desires the water of life may have it. What is the water of life? It is eternal life or salvation by Jesus Christ. So whoever desires salvation by Christ is invited to take it. All you have to have is a desire. Do you desire it? Then take it. But what is the cost? Answer: It is free. Is that price okay with you? Whoever desires salvation by Christ alone may take it freely by simple faith. In other words, even though you are a sinner who can do nothing to save yourself, if you desire to, you may simply believe that you now have salvation and mercy from Jesus because the blood of Jesus saves you from the wrath of God. It is not complicated. Just claim salvation by faith and tell the devil to go to hell where he belongs and then quit listening to him. Then whenever you are tempted to doubt once again, just remember God's promise and renew your confidence.

I have OCD Pure-o where I fear i'm already dead or died from a drug overdose back in 05....I also have PTSD and a psychotic disorder but it's up in the air which one. I say out of them all the PTSD is the worst, the nightmares of the end times that go on and on are just beyond me.....Trust me I know your pain and I also know what it feels like to think you have to live by the Law......I have just been delivered from such torment......I mess up hey everybody does but, I learn at a much slower pace believing God loves me regardless of how bad I mess up. That I'm already His and He knew beforehand how bad little ole me was going to trip up. If you can't gain a second by worrying why worry? this is what I have learned.....To trust that everything was finished on the cross but I have a Master and that is Christ.

What you wrote is helping me too.

If what I say can help just one person it's worth sharing.....I desire a closet in heaven.....A little cottoge because I know I don't go above and beyond what I know I am capable of......God please just let me be a door man....