I always do not attend Church's service on Sunday

LayHong_Loves_Christ · Jun 21, 2024

I always do not attend Church's service on Sunday, I feel boring, not interested, have no friends in Church,
my wife and I go to different churches,
I feel that the preaching is boring, very dull.
Wasting my time to go to church.

What is your advice to me?

Reluctant Theologian · Jun 21, 2024

Do you have no friends in general or just none in your church?

Try to find a fellowship of believers where you feel fed and uplifted spiritually, even when that includes reminding, admonishment or correction. If you feel going to church is like a passive experience that doesn't build you up .. find something else or maybe start your own fellowship or house church?

Don't waste your time indeed.

May I ask what kind of church at attend currently in (West/East) Malaysia? I've visited several churches in your country in the past.

Ivan Hlavanda · Jun 21, 2024

We go to the church because we want to be with God, and be because we want to hear His word. Don't you thirst and hunger after God's word? And as long as the preaching is correct, does it matter whether it's boring? Do you go to church to be entertained?

How can meetings with the glorious God be boring?

Sunday worship is about the Lord, not us, as is everything in life.

I pray for you, you can have a fellowship with your brothers and sisters in Christ. And I am sorrt you feel lile that in the church. God bless you.

LayHong_Loves_Christ · Jun 21, 2024

I went to Protestant and also Catholic churches.
Usually, I sat at the back on the last row and corner.
I do not know people and people also do not know me.
The preaching is so boring to me.
I am not good in singing, therefore singing hymns also sound boring to me.
I do give offering when the offering bag came to me.
this is why I feel boring and meaningless to go to Church,

Reluctant Theologian · Jun 21, 2024

LayHong_Loves_Christ said:
I went to Protestant and also Catholic churches.
Usually, I sat at the back on the last row and corner.
I do not know people and people also do not know me.
The preaching is so boring to me.
I am not good in singing, therefore singing hymns also sound boring to me.
I do give offering when the offering bag came to me.
this is why I feel boring and meaningless to go to Church,

What would your ideal church look like?

Feeling meaningless is not unexpected when indeed there is little you personally can contribute or having no interaction at all with other believers. At minimum you would contribute with your prayers and financial gift even when all else feels like void.

How could you encourage others before, during or after the service? Could you ask for prayer for yourself when feeling low? Is there any kind of musical worship you like? What is your personal favourite style of worship in your life?

seeking.IAM · Jun 21, 2024

When I found myself feeling similarly, I looked for a different church. I do not know your situation or how many choices you have, but you might consider if it is time to look around for a different church. It worked for me.

chevyontheriver · Jun 21, 2024

LayHong_Loves_Christ said:
I went to Protestant and also Catholic churches.
Usually, I sat at the back on the last row and corner.
I do not know people and people also do not know me.
The preaching is so boring to me.
I am not good in singing, therefore singing hymns also sound boring to me.
I do give offering when the offering bag came to me.
this is why I feel boring and meaningless to go to Church,

The purpose of a liturgy should not be to entertain you, to keep you from feeling bored. You should be there to praise and worship God Almighty. So you are there (or not there) under false pretenses. Until you can be there to praise and worship God it's not going to work for you. Do you have any reason to praise and worship God? Anything?

seeking.IAM · Jun 21, 2024

chevyontheriver said:
The purpose of a liturgy should not be to entertain you, to keep you from feeling bored

I agree with your premise, yet I think there are churches that have abandoned any semblance of liturgy so "worship" seems questionable. I think this is particularly true among some Protestant churches that seem to think they have to do something different and more exciting this week than they did last to keep folks in the pew. The church I left, a case in point, seemed to have completely abandoned any order of worship and became a stage show, a theatrical presentation of one special musical number after another without audience participation. All that was missing was an applause meter to rate the performances. The day I decided I was leaving had about 6 musical performances, an offering, and a vapid, anemic sermon. My active participation was limited to dropping my offering envelope in the plate. I realized my emptiness was because I felt like I was not worshipping and had become a mere observer. I left (toward participatory liturgical worship, by the way).

chevyontheriver · Jun 21, 2024

seeking.IAM said:
I agree with your premise, yet I think there are churches that have abandoned any semblance of liturgy so "worship" seems questionable. I think this is particularly true among some Protestant churches that seem to think they have to do something different and more exciting this week than they did last to keep folks in the pew. The church I left, a case in point, seemed to have completely abandoned any order of worship and became a stage show, a theatrical presentation of one special musical number after another without audience participation. All that was missing was an applause meter to rate the performances. The day I decided I was leaving had about 6 musical performances, an offering, and a vapid, anemic sermon. My active participation was limited to dropping my offering envelope in the plate. I realized my emptiness was because I felt like I was not worshipping and had become a mere observer. I left (toward participatory liturgical worship, by the way).

That's why I said the purpose 'should not be' to entertain you. Full well knowing that a lot of people get their popcorn or their lattes expecting to be entertained. And it never seems to be that much of an entertainment the second or third time around. We are easily sated. It gets boring. Which is why if it's not about actual praising of God and actual worship of God any supposed 'praise and worship' is empty and ultimately boring. It's a show. It's a waste of time.

Liturgy is a work. We put effort into it. We do something beautiful for God. It's not entertainment.

Unqualified · Jun 21, 2024

Do you read the Bible ? Is it exciting and does it help you? All churches are not the same. I would go to my wife’s church and have a friend there. Where do you get your answers for CF. State churches might be boring intentionally.

So many people don’t want to go to church for one reason or another. It’s part of the great apostasy and an attack of the evil one. He wants to knock off many, get them alone and work on their determination and faith. He is always working against everything good, He uses our flesh to make us lazy and contrary.

Im having a problem too, to get to church twice a week. I keep in prayer about it and try to stay positive. But I miss lately. Church can get boring. We must fight the flesh and stay interested in life. Fight depression and make ourselves go. Prepare for the study and read ahead. But a state church will not satisfy you.

Reasonably Sane · Jun 21, 2024

LayHong_Loves_Christ said:
I always do not attend Church's service on Sunday, I feel boring, not interested, have no friends in Church,
my wife and I go to different churches,
I feel that the preaching is boring, very dull.
Wasting my time to go to church.

What is your advice to me?

The preaching is probably my least favorite part of Church. I can get LOTS better preaching on Youtube or podcasts. But I don't go there for the preaching.

I go there to help others and be helped by others - i.e. to bless and be blessed. I go there to fellowship with other people within the umbrella of our common purpose - learning and applying Jesus' commandments to our daily lives. And attending the church service is part of that "christian bonding" experience. And to be blunt, you and your wife should be going to the same church. Period. Otherwise, what I just said does not apply to your experience.

Godcrazy · Jun 21, 2024

LayHong_Loves_Christ said:
I always do not attend Church's service on Sunday, I feel boring, not interested, have no friends in Church,
my wife and I go to different churches,
I feel that the preaching is boring, very dull.
Wasting my time to go to church.

What is your advice to me?

Get closer to God, your relationship with him. As well as pray regularly for more than 10 minutes, fast. When you feel like this, pray

Godcrazy · Jun 21, 2024

What people fail to understand its about having a relationship with God, and most of all, actually do what he say. Because he warns people if you don't do what he said you don't love him remember he says if you love me.. And the warnings

LayHong_Loves_Christ · Jun 23, 2024

I can have good relationship with God alone at home, why must I go to Church? Just to give offerings?

chevyontheriver · Jun 23, 2024

LayHong_Loves_Christ said:
I can have good relationship with God alone at home, why must I go to Church? Just to give offerings?

IF God was in that church building would you want to be there with Him? Or would you still be bored?

SabbathBlessings · Jun 23, 2024

I go to church on Sabbath (Saturday) and when I moved it took me a while to find the right church. I prefer a more theological based sermon, but I know the majority prefer more mainstream. I would try a few different churches until you find the right one for you. God wants us to be in fellowship with each other. Also ask God's help to find the right church. God bless.

LayHong_Loves_Christ · Jun 26, 2024

John 4:
21 “Woman,” Jesus replied, “believe me, a time is coming when you will worship the Father neither on this mountain nor in Jerusalem. 22 You Samaritans worship what you do not know; we worship what we do know, for salvation is from the Jews. 23 Yet a time is coming and has now come when the true worshipers will worship the Father in the Spirit and in truth, for they are the kind of worshipers the Father seeks. 24 God is spirit, and his worshipers must worship in the Spirit and in truth.”

Based on these verses, Lord Jesus did not request me to go to a specific place to worship God, did He?
What is important is that we must worship God from our hearts honestly.

com7fy8 · Jun 26, 2024

LayHong_Loves_Christ said:
What is important is that we must worship God from our hearts honestly.

Yes. And Jesus went to church, didn't He?

There are good things which Jesus did while He was in church.

He was honoring our Heavenly Father. And He was ministering the word of God to people in church. He was exposing any hypocrisy that was in church. And He was loving and sharing with people He could meet while in church.

You can love God all the time, and God is not boring.

But God is quiet, and we can let ourselves be violated by noisy stuff like anger and unforgiveness and complaining . . . and boredom.

Boredom is not how God communicates, I would say. So, I would advise that you do not trust what boredom and loneliness tell you, but trust God to guide you. And possibly this will include sharing with your wife about her church experience and what she gets out of it. And love her and her church's people by praying for them and possibly by visiting there.

But do evaluate what she and her church are doing >

"Test all things; hold fast what is good." (1 Thessalonians 5:21)

Loving is not boring.

Reluctant Theologian · Jun 26, 2024

LayHong_Loves_Christ said:
John 4:
21 “Woman,” Jesus replied, “believe me, a time is coming when you will worship the Father neither on this mountain nor in Jerusalem. 22 You Samaritans worship what you do not know; we worship what we do know, for salvation is from the Jews. 23 Yet a time is coming and has now come when the true worshipers will worship the Father in the Spirit and in truth, for they are the kind of worshipers the Father seeks. 24 God is spirit, and his worshipers must worship in the Spirit and in truth.”

Based on these verses, Lord Jesus did not request me to go to a specific place to worship God, did He?
What is important is that we must worship God from our hearts honestly.

As far as I know there is not a single verse in the New Covenant/NT books that connects the concept of 'worship' (Greek 'proskuneo') with the local church (= gathering/fellowship/assembly). At a local fellowship one can praise/sing/encourage/listen/prophecy/teach etc. but the word 'worship' does not really appear in connection with that.

Yeshua tells us to go to our inner room and pray there ... Our whole life is worship .. a physical position is worship (going prostrate on the floor) - but worship is not supposed to be done exclusively at a local church.

Your local church is not the house of God - it's not some kind of NT equivalent of the Temple. People worshipped at the Temple indeed, because the Temple literally was the house of God.

dzheremi · Jun 26, 2024

LayHong_Loves_Christ said:
I can have good relationship with God alone at home, why must I go to Church? Just to give offerings?

When St. Paul experienced meeting Christ on the road to Damascus, he was told to go into the city and meet the preexisting worshippers there. God knows that it is not good for us to be alone, and this is not just an observation meant for Adam or about Adam's being alone in the Garden, so He has created us to gather together in worship. That's why we must go.

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