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How did you meet?

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ayeess

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My question is for those that are happily married..and its how did you guys meet and what is the background of your relationship ? ,and how did you know that this person was the one, did GOD help you make that decision in any way? I'm asking because I am tres confused in that area...and I basically have this guy, I;'ve known for 9 years,adn we were best friends when we were younger, (now I am 20). And he's kind of troubled....he does not have his life together....but I still care for him and there's just a tendency for us to NOT talk for like a long whillee, but then all of a sudden he'll call me out of no where and talk to me..and he tries to pursue a relationship but were just so different and he seems very focussed on JUST partying , and im kinda past that....I'm confused so I wanted to know the stories of thsoe that are married, and anyif you had any advice AT ALL, it would be appreciated ..... thanx
 

grreeneiz

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Hello!

I like your question!

My husband and I met when we were around 18. We weren't saved. Fast-Forward 15 years, we are still together. God found us in 2005. We both firmly believe God had his plan. There was certain adjustments and we both lost people that we firmly believe God had to do in order for us to stay together. It was like a puzzle.

Believe me we have had our days. Alot of years partying. Also alot of days raising a family. We still have our days.

Maybe God keeps bringing him back to you for a reason??
 
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Antje

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My husband and I met at university. We had some friends in common, and slowly started hanging out more and more until it was plainly obvious that we were mutually interested. This was my first relationship and I was a bit of a basket case stressing out about the whole thing for about a year, wondering if we should break up and such. But I was a little crazy that way. About a year into the relationship, I realized that we had gone through a lot of stuff together and nothing had broken us up yet, and that this is the kind of relationship where we will work hard and figure things out together, and that's the kind of relationship I want to have in a marriage. So from then on it was just a matter of time until we got engaged (yet another year later) and married (7 month engagement).

I can honestly say I have had zero doubts about marrying him since before we got engaged. This is strange for me, because I like to worry about everything, but I like to see this certainty as a true blessing from God, because I don't think I could cope with my anxiety and worry if I doubted our marriage.

As for your situation: It sounds like he's really not relationship material at this point in his life. I would certainly steer clear of getting romantically involved until he pulls himself together somewhat. Evangelism dating (even if it's just a "cut back on partying" kind of evangelism ) is always a bad idea. However, it sounds like you really enjoy your friendship, so feel free to keep that up, and wait and see if he's ever in a place in his life where he's relationship material. I wouldn't wait around for him, though, because he may never be the right guy for you. Just pray and trust God that he has a plan for your life, and then use your best judgement to proceed.
 
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JohnDB

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I met mine on the internet...
I am a member of another web site and I have made a lot of friends there. I got to meet in person many from that site with nothing more than friendship as the goal. I did date a couple from that site but none were "it" for some reason or another.

I didn't date nurses and she didn't date guys like me. (I have several nurse friends but refused to date them for personal preference reasons)

I tried to run her off and get her to go away...but it only made her like me more...because my goals were her goals...my dreams are the same as her dreams.

She was known as being the queen of "no" to the guys in her life...
but for me she was the "OK Girl"...her girlfriends were truly shocked.

IN the end it came down to the fact that we made a great team in obtaining our goals and we got along great...so we got married. It isn't perfect all the time...but we both work at it and love each other. We have the common bond of the goals and dreams and push each other to attain them.

The dream?
We want to both be missionaries.
 
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ayeess

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But how do I know its not the Devil trying to put him in my life to lead me astray because I didn't really go into detail but when I say he's troubled I MEAN troubled, hes very far from God...but your story sure is encouraging...thanx.
 
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ayeess

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Yes I agree, I cannot get caught up with him and his lifestyle...even though I may have feelings for him.. I try to focus on that verse that says seek first the kingdom of GOD and everything else will be added to you, and that includes significant other ... Thanks for your story.
 
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ayeess

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Lol.. The Queen of No, that's funny...and I think its great how even tho you 2 may have tried to avoid and try to get away from each other, God made sure you guys were together!
 
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grreeneiz

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ayeess said:
But how do I know its not the Devil trying to put him in my life to lead me astray because I didn't really go into detail but when I say he's troubled I MEAN troubled, hes very far from God...but your story sure is encouraging...thanx.
Click to expand...


That's a good question.

But I think when it comes to being lead astray, it's only you to blame. Not God.

When I first met my husband, God was VERY far from him also! He almost had pentagrams tattooed to his palms. (That's how far!) We both come from very troubled backgrounds. But back then, we figured life was life. Just do the very best we can. But we completely promised not to lead lives the way our parents did. Which we didn't. But who knew life would be so awesome WITH God in it!!
 
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suzybeezy

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My hubby was best friends with my brother when we were little. I never really liked him, so I never talked to him. They ended up going their different paths when they were pre-teens. We literally lived like 2 blocks away from each other our entire lives. I ended up meeting in many many years later and in fact, at first I didn't even recognize him. I saw him going into a club and I had a few drinks and was being silly so I yelled out my car window "Hey where you been, I've been waiting for you". He was like "huh". Me and my friend drove off and then I saw him again and realized who he was so I went up to talk to him and said "I know you, but you don't know me" and that's where it began. He couldn't find my phone number, so he called me friend and said he wanted to go out with me. I knew without a shadow of a doubt that God sent this person just for me, it was undeniable. I mean, the fact that my first words to him where "where have you been, I've been waiting for you" and actually I was!!!!!

As for your situation, I'd be very careful. He doesn't sound like he's in a place to handle himself well, let alone a relationship. Be there as a support to help him get on the right path, and if its meant to be more, then God will orchestrate it.
 
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