I'm worried if I can't change my life I am going to end up killing myself or going to jail. I've attempted suicide before, I've been into a psychiatric hospital, nothing seems to take, I've managed to stop self harming and doing drugs but I still struggle with and eating disorder, smoking, lying, depression, anxiety and stealing which is a big one. I dont want to be this person anymore and I hate who I've become, I keep coming back to religion and I think it's some sort of sign, but I either cant bring myself to go to church or when I do want to I get violently ill which I believe is the devil trying to prevent me from going because I am supposed to be there. Please pray for me.