- Mar 22, 2011
- 17
- 1
- 33
- Faith
- Non-Denom
- Marital Status
- In Relationship
I have Mid Autism (Aspergers), Bipolar etc etc and I recently discovered I have Dyspraxia which is a little like Parkinson's disease (well the symptoms of), that's why I tremor, luckily im being treated so the tremor isn't around much now but I always had really bad hand cramps from the dyspraxia so whilst writing when I was young my fingers would lock up and that's why I use computers and qwerty phones all the time!!
Aspergers Autism provides me with obsessions with technology and music and writing things, some say its actually a gift because chances are your more intelligent with Autism, and although I want to be modest, my IQ is about 20 above average so I guess
One of my main obsessions is cleanliness, I shower 4 times a day and I always have to be dressed nice and smell good, but I guess that also is a good thing
Anyway, when I was an atheist I was pretty extreme, I wouldn't talk to you if you knew me because I hated anyone who believed in "the fairy tale" called the bible, I was extremely intolerant and I totally hated the idea of God because God made me this way, i was ignorant of course
in 2008 my girlfriend of 3 years decided she was sick of me beating her, even though I never laid a finger on her and she left me, she was actually getting into alcohol and it really destroyed me because clearly the booze was ruining her mind and making her think I did that but I didn't, one thing with Aspergers is coping with loss is VERY difficult, so I found myself hospitalized for the first time, I was in for about 6 months and then another 6 months afterward
Then, I overheard some random nurse saying "God can do anything, you know-far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams! from - Ephesians 3:20 (msg)"
So if God can do anything? Can he fix my depression???
he didn't, but he helped it, depression is never permanent which is a plus
Any who, after months of seeking help and trying to follow God I decided that it was time to change and get help but last year when we became friends things got pretty rough, not with the ex gf thing but with the gambling and self harm, I needed 25 stitches and I kept harming, in December 2010 I think I became a "proper" Christ believer because I started to change my ways and only in the last few weeks have I become a "better" christian because I've cut down alot of the sinning and friends.
When I was hospitalized in 2008 I had dreams about Jesus, and although I didn't believe, it was almost as if it were very very real, there was a beautiful mysterious lady hovering over my bed telling me things about Jesus and that people from a church would help me achieve my dreams, and they did, because I have succeeded with my music and websites etc.
Anyway point is, I wasn't on medication during the dreams so I know they weren't hallucinations, I dont have schizophrenia or whatever but I never saw the woman after that, and when I met my best friend from church, he told me about this time when he was fighting and doing drugs that he had a dream about a mysterious woman...I've still yet to tell him that the story he told me was exactly what i experienced
The storms not over, but it'd be a lot worse if it wasn't with my good mate Jesus
Aspergers Autism provides me with obsessions with technology and music and writing things, some say its actually a gift because chances are your more intelligent with Autism, and although I want to be modest, my IQ is about 20 above average so I guess
One of my main obsessions is cleanliness, I shower 4 times a day and I always have to be dressed nice and smell good, but I guess that also is a good thing
Anyway, when I was an atheist I was pretty extreme, I wouldn't talk to you if you knew me because I hated anyone who believed in "the fairy tale" called the bible, I was extremely intolerant and I totally hated the idea of God because God made me this way, i was ignorant of course
in 2008 my girlfriend of 3 years decided she was sick of me beating her, even though I never laid a finger on her and she left me, she was actually getting into alcohol and it really destroyed me because clearly the booze was ruining her mind and making her think I did that but I didn't, one thing with Aspergers is coping with loss is VERY difficult, so I found myself hospitalized for the first time, I was in for about 6 months and then another 6 months afterward
Then, I overheard some random nurse saying "God can do anything, you know-far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams! from - Ephesians 3:20 (msg)"
So if God can do anything? Can he fix my depression???
he didn't, but he helped it, depression is never permanent which is a plus
Any who, after months of seeking help and trying to follow God I decided that it was time to change and get help but last year when we became friends things got pretty rough, not with the ex gf thing but with the gambling and self harm, I needed 25 stitches and I kept harming, in December 2010 I think I became a "proper" Christ believer because I started to change my ways and only in the last few weeks have I become a "better" christian because I've cut down alot of the sinning and friends.
When I was hospitalized in 2008 I had dreams about Jesus, and although I didn't believe, it was almost as if it were very very real, there was a beautiful mysterious lady hovering over my bed telling me things about Jesus and that people from a church would help me achieve my dreams, and they did, because I have succeeded with my music and websites etc.
Anyway point is, I wasn't on medication during the dreams so I know they weren't hallucinations, I dont have schizophrenia or whatever but I never saw the woman after that, and when I met my best friend from church, he told me about this time when he was fighting and doing drugs that he had a dream about a mysterious woman...I've still yet to tell him that the story he told me was exactly what i experienced
The storms not over, but it'd be a lot worse if it wasn't with my good mate Jesus