"Flaunting it"?

Steezie · Oct 13, 2009

Im confused about this.

I've seen people here say they dislike homosexuals because they "flaunt" their sexuality.

This honestly confuses me because heterosexuals do the same thing and I dont see any objections. If someone who is straight is talking about their boyfriend or girlfriend or husband or wife, nobody jumps on them saying they are flaunting their sexuality.

Why is this?

Beanieboy · Oct 13, 2009

As far as I can gather, it is simply a double standard imposed on people who somehow think that because they are heterosexual, they are entitled, while homosexuals are not, because they are the minority, or "not normal."

I had a coworker tell the whole office how she and her boyfriend had sex all the time, and she got pregnant with her daughter while they were still dating, so they decided to marry. She talked about her husband and daughter all the time, often more than I wanted to know. Half an hour later, she started talking about her old boss, who simply had a picture of his partner on his desk. She said, "He was gay, and didn't even try to hide it!" She implied that he should, while she can talk about having premarital sex, getting pregnant out of wedlock, and still be Captain Morality.

Another time, I was talking about Titanic with coworkers. I finally said, "You know, I went with my boyfriend, and all we could say after 2 hours is, "Come on! Die! I have stuff to do!" One uptight coworker said, "Hold on. What you do in your own bedroom is none of my concern, and I don't want to hear about it." I answered, "We weren't in the bedroom, we were in a movie theater, and as far as I recall, watching a movie, and not having sex in it."

Had I changed it to "girlfriend", there would have been no comment, because heterosexuals concentrate on the "hetero", but when discussing homosexuality, they concentrate on the "sexual" part.

That's why few of these discussions ever go farther than the sex act, and never discuss the love or romance aspect of it, even though the know full well that married couples are not simply sexual relationships, and nothing more. The sex is a small part of the relationship.

Zebra1552 · Oct 13, 2009

Steezie said:
Im confused about this.

I've seen people here say they dislike homosexuals because they "flaunt" their sexuality.

This honestly confuses me because heterosexuals do the same thing and I dont see any objections. If someone who is straight is talking about their boyfriend or girlfriend or husband or wife, nobody jumps on them saying they are flaunting their sexuality.

Why is this?

Because people are afraid of what they don't understand, I guess... I'd be more concerned about drunks flaunting their drunkness, personally.

keith99 · Oct 13, 2009

In my experience gays generally do not flaunt their sexuality. If a het couple are holding hands it is acceptable, a gay couple doing the same thing is "flounting it". If a couple of women are holding hands in a crowded area they must be gay and flounting it. Absolutely no chance that they are just friends who want to get somewhere and not get seperated.

That last brings up a funny (if it were not so sad and true) image. Two women hurrying to get to the place where they will be meeting their male dates getting accused of being lesbians flaunting their sexuality.

nolongerhome · Oct 13, 2009

So a parade one day a year is flaunting it and the people that have a problem with flaunting it only have a problem on that one day of the year?

Steezie · Oct 13, 2009

Chesterton said:
<staff edit>

I'd qualify that as dressing strangely, I dont see that it qualifies as flaunting one's sexuality.

Is the Naked Cowboy flaunting his sexuality?

quatona · Oct 13, 2009

Chesterton said:
<staff edit>

Is this guy flaunting his sexuality?
How do I tell?
If so, is he flaunting his homosexuality or his heterosexuality?
How do I tell?

Zebra1552 · Oct 13, 2009

quatona said:
Is this guy flaunting his sexuality?
How do I tell?
If so, is he flaunting his homosexuality or his heterosexuality?
How do I tell?

Yeah, like the rainbow isn't a dead giveaway?

quatona · Oct 13, 2009

Godschild87 said:
Yeah, like the rainbow isn't a dead giveaway?

Where I come from the rainbow is a symbol for peace.

Where´s a rainbow, anyways?

Steezie · Oct 14, 2009

Godschild87 said:
Yeah, like the rainbow isn't a dead giveaway?

It actually isnt. I know people who dress like that for fun who arent gay. They're a little nutty, but not gay.

lawtonfogle · Oct 14, 2009

Chesterton said:
<staff edit>

Those I filed under 'mentally unstable', I don't care if they are heterosexual, homosexual, pansexual, or asexual.

lawtonfogle · Oct 14, 2009

Godschild87 said:
Yeah, like the rainbow isn't a dead giveaway?

If everything that involved a rainbow was homosexual... well lets just say the creative ministries at my church is in some big trouble.

Verv · Oct 14, 2009

Steezie said:
Im confused about this.

I've seen people here say they dislike homosexuals because they "flaunt" their sexuality.

This honestly confuses me because heterosexuals do the same thing and I dont see any objections. If someone who is straight is talking about their boyfriend or girlfriend or husband or wife, nobody jumps on them saying they are flaunting their sexuality.

Why is this?

People dislike the flaunting of homosexuality for two reasons:

(1) They find it to be a lifestyle that physically makes them uncomfortable or disgusted and they dislike having that feeling.

(2) They find it to be a lifestyle which is inherently immoral or sinful and do not feel comfortable around it.

Wherever you go, there will be people who disapprove of what you do. In some places one can catch grief for being openly religious.

Is it right? Probably not.

However, I have written on this topic...

I do not flaunt my extreme looks in front of, specifically, minors.

If someone is out at night clubs and on the bar scene being openly gay or extreme in appearance it is different than doing it at Sunday brunch in front of countless church goers or on a Monday night in suburbia at a family restaurant.

Just as such...

I do not wear a suit and tie to chess club every wednesday, and I do not wear short sleeves and a shirt with a Soldier-like figure with a skull for a face with the band name 'Combat 84' on it to teach 7 year olds English.

Steezie · Oct 14, 2009

Verv said:
and I do not wear short sleeves and a shirt with a Soldier-like figure with a skull for a face with the band name 'Combat 84' on it to teach 7 year olds English.

They'd probably dig it if you did

trunks2k · Oct 14, 2009

lawtonfogle said:
Those I filed under 'mentally unstable', I don't care if they are heterosexual, homosexual, pansexual, or asexual.

Why mentally unstable? It's obviously some part of a parade and/or celebration (in this case probably a gay pride parade), and people in various cultures dress not too much different than that in various festivals and parades. Mardi Gras in New Orleans, Carnival in Rio, etc.

Rebekka · Oct 14, 2009

Beanieboy said:
As far as I can gather, it is simply a double standard imposed on people who somehow think that because they are heterosexual, they are entitled, while homosexuals are not, because they are the minority, or "not normal."

That's it. If you're "normal" you don't have to defend yourself, it is accepted without question. People don't like those who are different from the masses so they look for reasons to criticize them. So they state that they're not against homosexuality per se, only against the fact that gays "flaunt" their sexuality. But that's just an excuse, as your example illustrates.

Beanieboy said:
Another time, I was talking about Titanic with coworkers. I finally said, "You know, I went with my boyfriend, and all we could say after 2 hours is, "Come on! Die! I have stuff to do!" One uptight coworker said, "Hold on. What you do in your own bedroom is none of my concern, and I don't want to hear about it." I answered, "We weren't in the bedroom, we were in a movie theater, and as far as I recall, watching a movie, and not having sex in it."

Had I changed it to "girlfriend", there would have been no comment, because heterosexuals concentrate on the "hetero", but when discussing homosexuality, they concentrate on the "sexual" part.

Rochir · Oct 14, 2009

Chesterton said:
<staff edit>

Yeah, just like irish flaunt their stereotypes once a year:

lawtonfogle · Oct 14, 2009

trunks2k said:
Why mentally unstable? It's obviously some part of a parade and/or celebration (in this case probably a gay pride parade), and people in various cultures dress not too much different than that in various festivals and parades. Mardi Gras in New Orleans, Carnival in Rio, etc.

Assuming someone was raised in the United States, their behavior (namely how far they dress down, yet still are not going nude) deviates enough from normal to be considered abnormal. Maybe the culture they are us to is that different, but compared to the culture I live in, even at a 'liberal college', it is different enough to be called abnormal.

Blackmarch · Oct 14, 2009

Steezie said:
Im confused about this.

I've seen people here say they dislike homosexuals because they "flaunt" their sexuality.

This honestly confuses me because heterosexuals do the same thing and I dont see any objections. If someone who is straight is talking about their boyfriend or girlfriend or husband or wife, nobody jumps on them saying they are flaunting their sexuality.

Why is this?

That's not my definition of flaunt... of the few times I have used that term. I have not a problem about a Homosexual talking about their husband or wife, anymore than I do a heterosexual.

Now if either are talking about what they do in the bedroom in a place like a restaurant or are having a make out session in public then ya that's more like "flaunting".
To which when such has occurred I've never "jumped" on them, let alone even give them a talking to.

Do I wish they'd learn some etiquette? yes.

Zebra1552 · Oct 14, 2009

Steezie said:
It actually isnt. I know people who dress like that for fun who arent gay. They're a little nutty, but not gay.

The context of it is a dead giveaway. They're in a parade. We just had a bunch of gay pride marches.

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