Do I tell or not?????

cookie010456 · Sep 16, 2006

Hi everyone. I'm new to this stuff so I hope I'm doing it right. I need some sound advice. My husband is a cocaine addict and has been for many years, on and off. He has his own business framing houses for a development company. However, every guy on his crew is an addict!!! they smoke crack on the jobsite! I want to tell the job superintendent what they are doing b/c I realize the danger. However, the last developer my husband worked for, I told him about my husband's addiction and a christian friend of mine, who is also a counselor told me that I shouldn't have done that. That I was trying to get revenge and control my husband's addiction. That I had to allow God to control. I know that my husband may lose all of his work, but to be honest, I feel that maybe that would encourage him to get some help. What do you all think? I really need some advice!!! And would you all remember my husband, John, in your prayers? Thanks.

AngelDove1 · Sep 18, 2006

prayin for you....
cookie,have to discussed this with yur husbend?

I agree with your friend.

Try talking to your pastor,and make some Al-anon meetings.
You'll find the answers there.You'd be surprized
how many christians you'll incounter at those meetings,
Also mighty I suggest...going to AA open meetings too.
You'll learn from either meetings.

Look for the help in these places,your not alone,and you
don't need to be. Look for the serinity you will need from Gods people.
And the understanding from the meetings.
the help is there.Do the foot work.

God bless you

Heiroglyph · Sep 18, 2006

It seems like a private matter to me, I dont think you should involve his job in it. Hes going to need a job if he is going to recover. Instead maybe if you told him you'll leave him if he doesn't stop it. You don't want to be tied down to a crack addict. If he wont stop you would then leave and leave him the option to quit and recover to get you back.
If thats not motivation enough then Id ont know what will be. Losing his job would just be stressful on him and cause him to seek solace in his drug even more probably. Plus they may not give him the option or encouragement to quit. Either way if he quits its important to have a job to go do to keep him busy.

gmadison · Sep 18, 2006

Forgive me for not offering my advise. I just wanted you to know that you and your husband are in my prayers. I have been off and on with crack for 16 years. I have been to many rehab's both Christian and secular. I have now been clean for 6 months. The light of the gospel shines brighter than ever for me now. I don't believe that I will ever go back to using and God has really blessed me lately with the type of material that I have longed for. I have been taking an online course at www.settingcaptivefree.com and reding "Addictions: A Banquet in the Grave". Combined with some of the material which the Lord allow me to write a number of years ago I am finding a lot of strength. God bless you.
Let me know if I can help in anyway.

SOTK · Sep 18, 2006

cookie010456 said:
Hi everyone. I'm new to this stuff so I hope I'm doing it right. I need some sound advice. My husband is a cocaine addict and has been for many years, on and off. He has his own business framing houses for a development company. However, every guy on his crew is an addict!!! they smoke crack on the jobsite! I want to tell the job superintendent what they are doing b/c I realize the danger. However, the last developer my husband worked for, I told him about my husband's addiction and a christian friend of mine, who is also a counselor told me that I shouldn't have done that. That I was trying to get revenge and control my husband's addiction. That I had to allow God to control. I know that my husband may lose all of his work, but to be honest, I feel that maybe that would encourage him to get some help. What do you all think? I really need some advice!!! And would you all remember my husband, John, in your prayers? Thanks.

I'm sorry that you are going through this. Are you and your husband involved with a church? If so, are you or your husband seeking counsel from a Pastor or leader from the church? If not, I would suggest you both do this and do it soon. If your husband won't go, you should go. You must take care of yourself first. It's easy to get caught up in a loved one's sinful choices or behavior. Having a mentor or seeking counsel can help you in seeing what God's will is for you as well as His will in this situation. It also goes without saying that you must be seeking counsel directly from God in this. We all should do the above before rushing to a decision in anything in life.

As far as my opinion goes regarding what you have written, I am reluctant to give you too much counsel. Counsel should really come from somebody else who knows you and your situation a little more intimately. I will say that I wouldn't do what you are considering. If it is God's will for your husband to lose his job or to come to a place where he is willing to seek God's help and forgiveness, it will happen when it is supposed to. It's not your place to make it happen. This is all I will say. Again, I strongly urge you to seek counsel from God, take care of yourself, and seek counsel from your church.

Hang in there! I'll be praying!

Blessings,

SOTK

mebby02 · Sep 23, 2006

if l were you l would have a nice honest talk with your husband about this. Take him to addiction services he shouldn't have to something like this. and same with you Its not right for you to put up with something like this. I wouldn't go through that l would talk to your husband to get some counselling about this. And go to pastor and take your husband to some support groups. Try that and see if that works God bless you hun I hope everything work out for the better

Do I tell or not?????

cookie010456

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Heiroglyph

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Do I tell or not?????

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