Those who sincerely focus on Mary ARE led to her Son. That is her witness to us. And it is the reason for the reverence for her in Catholic Church, (Orthodox Churches, as well, by the way). 'Anti-Catholics', as a general rule, don't subscribe to the communion of the Saints to begin with. Without an understanding of the communion of saints, then you don't envision Mary (or any other saint), as being alive in Heaven, and you don't believe that saints, (who Catholics believe to be very much alive), can carry our prayers to her son. They don't tend to believe the Marian apparitions. They don't understand her to be the new Ark of the Covenant, (The original ark carried the Word of God as scripture - The New Ark of the covenant carried the Word of God made Flesh). They would have her living a standard married life with her husband in spite of blessed nature of her womb, and her marriage to the Holy Spirit, having consummated, and so don't get the idea of the purity of the ark of the covenant, and therefore perpetual virginity. Nor do they understand or grasp the immaculate conception, and Mary being set apart by God to be the bearer of His Son. Himself. The Mother of God. They simply don't understand who Mary IS, and why she's of such great import to the Christian. There are whole large books on this subject. I don't let these views upset me personally. I know the difference between reverence and idolatry. Many of the Catholic Views on Mary come straight from scripture itself. A few others from the Fathers. The first couple chapters of the Gospel of St. Luke contain enough of a seminar on Mary to at least make her non-offensive to Christians of all types, and to wonder and ponder a little bit. Here are a few of them, which bear some meditation and prayer if nothing else:
Mary is the mother of Jesus. Jesus is God. Mary is the Mother of God. The Mother of our Lord.
Isaiah 7:[13] And he said: Hear ye therefore, O house of David: Is it a small thing for you to be grievous to men, that you are grievous to my God also? [14] Therefore the Lord himself shall give you a sign. Behold a virgin shall conceive, and bear a son, and his name shall be called Emmanuel.
Matthew 1:18 And this was the manner of Christs birth. His mother Mary was espoused to Joseph, but they had not yet come together, when she was found to be with child, by the power of the Holy Ghost. 19 Whereupon her husband Joseph (for he was a right-minded man, and would not have her put to open shame) was for sending her away in secret. 20 But hardly had this thought come to his mind, when an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream, and said, Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to take thy wife Mary to thyself, for it is by the power of the Holy Ghost that she has conceived this child; 21 and she will bear a son, whom thou shalt call Jesus, for he is to save his people from their sins. 22 All this was so ordained to fulfil the word which the Lord spoke by his prophet: 23 Behold, the virgin shall be with child, and shall bear a son, and they shall call him Emmanuel (which means, God with us)
Matt 2:10 They, when they saw the star, were glad beyond measure; 11 and so, going into the dwelling, they found the child there, with his mother Mary, and fell down to worship him; and, opening their store of treasures, they offered him gifts, of gold and frankincense and myrrh.
Luke 1:41 No sooner had Elizabeth heard Marys greeting, than the child leaped in her womb; and Elizabeth herself was filled with the Holy Ghost; 42 so that she cried out with a loud voice, Blessed art thou among women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb. 43 How have I deserved to be thus visited by the mother of my Lord?
Luke 1:26 When the sixth month came, God sent the angel Gabriel to a city of Galilee called Nazareth, 27 where a virgin dwelt, betrothed to a man of Davids lineage; his name was Joseph, and the virgins name was Mary. 28 Into her presence the angel came, and said, Hail, thou who art full of grace; the Lord is with thee; blessed art thou among women.[4] 29 She was much perplexed at hearing him speak so, and cast about in her mind, what she was to make of such a greeting. 30 Then the angel said to her, Mary, do not be afraid; thou hast found favour in the sight of God. 31 And behold, thou shalt conceive in thy womb, and shalt bear a son, and shalt call him Jesus. 32 He shall be great, and men will know him for the Son of the most High; the Lord God will give him the throne of his father David, and he shall reign over the house of Jacob eternally; 33 his kingdom shall never have an end. 34 But Mary said to the angel, How can that be, since I have no knowledge of man? 35 And the angel answered her, The Holy Spirit will come upon thee, and the power of the most High will overshadow thee. Thus this holy offspring of thine shall be known for the Son of God.
Mary points us to Jesus at every turn. It is Jesus she brings us, and shows to us. She models her life after Him. Though she is sinless as the ark, she is still in need of a savior. She is blessed and full of grace because of Jesus. We are told that Mary's soul even magnifies the Lord for us.-
Luke 1:46 And Mary said, My soul magnifies the Lord; 47 my spirit has found joy in God, who is my Saviour, 48 because he has looked graciously upon the lowliness of his handmaid. Behold, from this day forward all generations will count me blessed; 49 because he who is mighty, he whose name is holy, has wrought for me his wonders. 50 He has mercy upon those who fear him, from generation to generation; 51 he has done valiantly with the strength of his arm, driving the proud astray in the conceit of their hearts; 52 he has put down the mighty from their seat, and exalted the lowly; 53 he has filled the hungry with good things, and sent the rich away empty-handed. 54 He has protected his servant Israel, keeping his merciful design in remembrance, 55 according to the promise which he made to our forefathers, Abraham and his posterity for evermore.
As the mother of God she continues to play a key role in the salvation of God's people -
1 And now, in heaven, a great portent appeared; a woman that wore the sun for her mantle, with the moon under her feet, and a crown of twelve stars about her head. 2 She had a child in her womb, and was crying out as she travailed, in great pain of her delivery. 3 Then a second portent appeared in heaven; a great dragon was there, fiery-red, with seven heads and ten horns, and on each of the seven heads a royal diadem; 4 his tail dragged down a third part of the stars in heaven, and flung them to earth. And he stood fronting the woman who was in childbirth, ready to swallow up the child as soon as she bore it. 5 She bore a son, the son who is to herd the nations like sheep with a crook of iron; and this child of hers was caught up to God, right up to his throne, 6 while the mother fled into the wilderness, where God had prepared a place of refuge for her, and there, for twelve hundred and sixty days, she is to be kept safe.
The Father has Mary prompt her Son's ministry, and tells us to "do as He says" -
1 Two days afterwards, there was a wedding-feast at Cana, in Galilee; and Jesus mother was there. 2 Jesus himself, and his disciples, had also been invited to the wedding. 3 Here the supply of wine failed; whereupon Jesus mother said to him, They have no wine left. 4 Jesus answered her, Nay, woman, why dost thou trouble me with that? My time has not come yet.[1] 5 And his mother said to the servants, Do whatever he tells you.
All importance ascribed to Mary is pointing to her Son. She is who she is, because He is who He is.
Jesus gave her to us.
John 19:26 And Jesus, seeing his mother there, and the disciple, too, whom he loved, standing by, said to his mother, Woman, this is thy son. 27 Then he said to the disciple, This is thy mother. And from that hour the disciple took her into his own keeping.
She shared in His life on earth at every turn, and she continues to share in His life in Heaven. Mary being a human, has great empathy and love for our struggles. She has appeared to the humble on earth many times with advice for us. None of which, (in the verified apparitions), has ever contradicted God, but only enhanced and "magnified" our understanding of God's love.
There is no scandal or idolatry in her being our spiritual mother, and asking for her intercession with her Son in prayer.
On the other hand, it is not required that we have Marian devotion to be saved. So if one is uncomfortable in Marian devotion then they need not be scandalized by those who are comfortable in Marian devotion. And likewise, neither should one who has a personal devotion to Mary be scandalized by those who don't, or have as yet, not been able to understand.