Considering Visiting a LCMS

SyntheticPaper · Apr 1, 2011

KatAutumn said:
I've heard that Lutheran churches tend to feel a bit "cold" if you're a visitor. I'm used to the whole, "heyyyyyy darlin'! C'mer 'n gimme a huggggg!" welcome in churches, so my hope would be I wouldn't mistake reverence for a stuck-up congregation.

Oh goodness, if anyone had tried to hug me the first time I went there that would have been quite horrid. But it wasn't stuck up either, everyone was really nice, just not all emotional and physical and all that stuff which I never liked anyway. It's all just your regular old stand around talkin' about this an' that while drinking coffee and eating a cookie.

MarkRohfrietsch · Apr 1, 2011

KatAutumn said:
Everyone has been so helpful in this thread! I haven't had the chance to visit the LCMS church yet, as we're a one-vehicle family and my husband has had to work mandatory over-time every weekend lately. I did think of one more question, though, before I visit. I feel lead to cover my hair in worship. Will I be looked at super funny if I wear a discreet kerchief on my head during the service? Are hats/veils/scarves worn by some Lutheran women during service, or is that frowned upon/considered ridiculous?

When I was a child, all the women wore hats or a kerchief. As styles changed, only the older Polish women continued to wear them. Back then, all the men and boys wore suits and ties, now there are just a few of us.

If you feel compelled to cover your head, then do so. In my current Congregation, there is a Mennonite man and his mother who have been attending every Sunday. She dresses in a traditional Mennonite Surplus dress, and wears the simple mesh bonnet that is commonly refered to as a "soup strainer". No one cares about how she, or the rest of us dress; we are all just so happy that all that come are there!

BTW, neither her, nor her son have joined the congregation, but they love our formal service, our music, and really appreciate the Bible based preaching.

Luther073082 · Apr 1, 2011

KatAutumn said:
Everyone has been so helpful in this thread! I haven't had the chance to visit the LCMS church yet, as we're a one-vehicle family and my husband has had to work mandatory over-time every weekend lately. I did think of one more question, though, before I visit. I feel lead to cover my hair in worship. Will I be looked at super funny if I wear a discreet kerchief on my head during the service? Are hats/veils/scarves worn by some Lutheran women during service, or is that frowned upon/considered ridiculous?

I don't know that its necessarily frowned upon but I've never seen Lutheran women wearing it because no major Lutheran churchs that I'm aware of belive that women should be made to wear a head covering during worship.

Also I've found out that Lutherans in general tend to be pretty careful about physical affection like hugging.

PreachersWife2004 · Apr 1, 2011

KatAutumn said:
Everyone has been so helpful in this thread! I haven't had the chance to visit the LCMS church yet, as we're a one-vehicle family and my husband has had to work mandatory over-time every weekend lately. I did think of one more question, though, before I visit. I feel lead to cover my hair in worship. Will I be looked at super funny if I wear a discreet kerchief on my head during the service? Are hats/veils/scarves worn by some Lutheran women during service, or is that frowned upon/considered ridiculous?

I've seen hats and scarves but no veils. If you feel lead to do so, no one in the church should have a problem with it. Some of our older ladies do so, although I think that's more of a trait of them being older and not necessarily because they felt led to, but no one blinks either way.

And if someone takes umbrage at it, simply educate them on why you feel led to do so. Many of our members kneel in the pews after they've taken communion and I had never seen that until we got here to MN so I asked someone (at least I wasn't rude about it, though) and once they explained, it made perfect sense why they choose to do it.

Tangible · Apr 1, 2011

Yes, it's interesting that though women seldom cover their heads, it is still expected that men should not cover their heads.

If you wish to cover your head during the divine service, there should be no objection. There is even a biblical basis for doing so - in your Christian freedom of course, and not out of compulsion.

Aibrean · Apr 1, 2011

Paul said:
but if a woman has long hair, it is her glory? For her hair is given to her for a covering.

That's my reason for not.

PreachersWife2004 · Apr 1, 2011

Aibrean said:
That's my reason for not.

I have short hair. I guess I'm exempt.

I think it's one of those things that if you want to do, great, but it's not a rule that we have to anymore.

MaryEmily · Apr 16, 2011

I started attending a Lutheran church last fall and am in the middle of our "Good News" class. It's been a wonderful experience for me. I came out of a Reformed Baptist church, raised Catholic etc... No hugging in my church and we do have a lady that wears beautiful hats btw.

It took some getting used to the reserved nature of folks, but they are as friendly as can be. I hope you get a chance to attend. There are also weekday bible studies you might consider attending (if they offer them) or a newcomers class. That way, you can get your feet wet even if you are not able to attend on Sunday. My husband has been working 7 days a week now and I squeeze in the Sunday early service. I"m waiting for him to get home any minute now. I stayed up to fix his dinner and get a chance to actually SEE him once this week.

There are also excellent podcasts as well - Holy Trinity Lutheran Church with Bill Cwirla (I think that's the name) as well as Issues Etc. (*very good doctrinal information). Both have websites as well as podcasts from Itunes. I Download every week and listen during my commute to work and at lunches. It helps. I got the large and small catechisms and read those and have branched out a bit more in the books I've been reading. My pastor recommended quite a few good books to read to help me understand the theology a bit better. (I'm one of those bookworm types).

Let us know how it goes.

MarkRohfrietsch · Apr 16, 2011

PreachersWife2004 said:
I've seen hats and scarves but no veils. If you feel lead to do so, no one in the church should have a problem with it. Some of our older ladies do so, although I think that's more of a trait of them being older and not necessarily because they felt led to, but no one blinks either way.

And if someone takes umbrage at it, simply educate them on why you feel led to do so. Many of our members kneel in the pews after they've taken communion and I had never seen that until we got here to MN so I asked someone (at least I wasn't rude about it, though) and once they explained, it made perfect sense why they choose to do it.

My mom and her sisters always took great pains to make sure their hair was perfect, when I was a child they all wore kerchiefs in Church. Later, when this custom changed, they continued to wear them to, but not in Church, so the wind would not mess their hair up.

Aibrean · Apr 16, 2011

PreachersWife2004 said:
I have short hair. I guess I'm exempt.

I think it's one of those things that if you want to do, great, but it's not a rule that we have to anymore.

Mine isn't super long either. I just don't think buzz cuts or pixies are very feminine. More androgynous. I like to look female.

Case in point...Emma Watson

goldbeach · Apr 16, 2011

My wife wears a head covering every service. I guess she just believes what Paul says as it not being an option. She doesn't consider it legalistic either.

DaRev · Apr 16, 2011

Aibrean said:
Case in point...Emma Watson

You sure that isn't Justin Beiber?

alexnbethmom · Apr 16, 2011

i have an A-line bob, it is VERY short, especially in the back, and i can assure you, i look VERY feminine....

i should amend this by saying, that i used to be told, when i would cut my hair short (without "permission") that i looked like a.....well, an unflattering, derogatory word......so this makes me a little "on edge".

DaRev · Apr 16, 2011

alexnbethmom said:
i have an A-line bob, it is VERY short, especially in the back, and i can assure you, i look VERY feminine....

Aibrean · Apr 16, 2011

I like bobs...my mom has one - it's the only way that her hair has volume. When I mean short I mean overall.

MarkRohfrietsch · Apr 16, 2011

DaRev said:
You sure that isn't Justin Beiber?

Beiber is from my city. All the school boys (that aren't into punk and hip-hop) either have, or want Beiber hair. It's a standing joke around town among those of my generation (most of us are bald)... but all of the little girls just love him.

Tangible · Apr 16, 2011

Aibrean said:
I like bobs...my mom has one - it's the only way that her hair has volume. When I mean short I mean overall.

I started to read this wrong and was very confused for a second. :o

DaRev · Apr 16, 2011

Tangible said:
I started to read this wrong and was very confused for a second. :o

PreachersWife2004 · Apr 16, 2011

Aibrean said:
Mine isn't super long either. I just don't think buzz cuts or pixies are very feminine. More androgynous. I like to look female.

Case in point...Emma Watson

I think she looks gorgeous. I think short cuts can look very feminine. I've had short hair pretty much my entire life and I've always managed to look like a girl. Except when I'm playing softball - then I will admit I look kinda like a guy.

Aibrean said:
I like bobs...my mom has one - it's the only way that her hair has volume. When I mean short I mean overall.

Currently I have an reverse bob cut, it's very short in the back but angled in the front. It's quite an edgy cut for a 37 year old mother of 4, but it's easy to manage. I'll never be able to have long hair, it just grows weird and looks yucky.

I guess what I'm trying to say here is that it's fine if you don't like short hair, overall or whatever, but I'd be careful about how you categorize it. You also never know the circumstances behind a woman having very short hair.

Just so y'all have a point of reference, this is a pic I took a few days ago:

alexnbethmom · Apr 16, 2011

PW - your cut actually kinda looks like mine - i was told that was an A-line bob, but yours is a little shorter than mine (not by much, though....) i think your hair looks super cute!! and very feminine!!!

(and i got a little confused too, about the "i like bobs" comment, - i was in a major hurry when i read that!!)

Considering Visiting a LCMS

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