Careful Little One What You Let in Your Heart

I never thought it mattered what i watched or listen to or read. Now I see it matters what a person watches or listen to.

I had a health issue and I went about a week where I could not eat solid foods. I only drank stuff for a week. Threw up a lot. This was like a fast. i listen to christian radio, and I studied the Bible a lot and Had school which is Bible studies. I became surprised that I started to feel better strong. I was still very sick but I felt the Lord with me. Finally yesterday i could eat. i had hummus because i heard Jews would eat that when coming back from a fast, because eating solid foods after not eating for a week can be dangerous. You need to come back slow with that. I rented two movies gravity and wolf of wall street. Gravity was not bad. Wolf of wall street is a very bad movie which glorifies sex drugs and money and cheating people. Basically glorifies lawlessness.

I did not think wolf of wall street affected me. I mean there is a lot of sexual stuff in it. i thought I was doing well i did not lust, but then i laugh at scene about drugs. i felt it in my heart I had let the movie in. It became a temptation. A temptation to live with out rules, to go after my fortune like I started to when I was younger. Thoughts came in like ministers get no thanks, they are always poor. The life of the poor is meaningless. i am poor my life always had meaning because of God. This movie i thought was innocence planted a seed. I had open the door that had been closed, a door to worldly things. I talk to my wife about it, and she could not understand what was wrong with me. So all i did was make her feel bad. i prayed and then walked in to the bathroom and my heart just broke. I began to cry. I felt bad for wanting the illusion for wanting to be rich, for thinking that was life. My heart broke because the greatest honor I received to be called to the Lord to minister, I had second thoughts about it. I wondered if I wanted it. Its not about me I have been called, and that is what its like for anyone wondering, a calling. The person just feels called by God to go into ministry.

So now i feel a bit better. I still feel like i could break down and cry again. The lesson of the story, Be Careful little one what you let into your heart.

USCGrad90 said:

I think the fact that you felt bad shows your sensitivity to sin, which is hard for some people to understand. Especially if you are coming from a time of focus on things spiritual.
In college, I went on a camping and canoeing trip with my, dad, brother, 2 friends, and their dad. After being out in the wild for a week, with freeze-dried foods and only water to drink, coming back into town and going out for a pizza was a big impact on the senses. I could not drink a soda for a while, because it was so much sweeter and thicker than the water I had in the wild.
The world is a lot like that soda - packs in all of these things we don't need and might be harmful, but then tells us that it is good or better than what we already have.
Christ is the living water and we only need Him. We sometimes miss that point with all of the distractions around us.

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That's a good story. Makes a lot of sense.