Argh!

captiveheart · Nov 11, 2008

Sometimes I get weary from the struggle. My wife had a cybersex thing going with some guy on the other side of the continent and then a few days after finding out about that, and trying to process all of that stuff, I felt a lump in her breast. It turns out to be cancer. She had a lumpectomy on Oct 13th and then on Nov 4th she had another surgery to take a greater margin from the tumor area. Turns out that the cancer was caught so early she won't even have to have chemotherapy.

I have worked so hard for her, to take care of her when she is sick. I've worked so hard to dismiss my broken heart and understand the deceit and the betrayal. I just get weary. Sometimes I feel like just giving up. I know that it is just the exhaustion talking but right now, I'm just emotionally and physically spent. I pray that God gives me the strength and the courage to carry on.

This probably shouldn't be in this thread as my wife and I are still together.

ido · Dec 16, 2008

I'm frustrated right now b/c I got a letter from the IRS in the mail today which basically confirms that my ex is trying to claim our oldest son on his 2007 tax return EVEN THOUGH the divorce order specifically states that he is not allowed to claim him if he is in arrears on his support as of 12/31 of each year. (Which, btw, he won't be claiming him again for 2008, either). I have been feeling very spread thin lately and I really didn't need one more action item on my already full plate - especially one that doesn't belong there to begin with. grrrrrrr

FaithfulWife · Dec 16, 2008

LOL Oh flnativegrl I have to empathize with you. One of our ex's tries it EVERY YEAR too. Also constantly late or not paying CS but then acting indignant and saying we embarrassed them at work to apply a CS garnishment. "No we weren't the ones to embarrass you. You're behavior did that. "

ido · Dec 16, 2008

FaithfulWife said:
LOL Oh flnativegrl I have to empathize with you. One of our ex's tries it EVERY YEAR too. Also constantly late or not paying CS but then acting indignant and saying we embarrassed them at work to apply a CS garnishment. "No we weren't the ones to embarrass you. You're behavior did that. "

Exactly!! Thanks for feeling my pain.

MyKidsDaddy · Dec 23, 2008

Just want to vent. It is Christmas...and I find out that my wife has a separate cell phone from her boyfriend. I called the number and got her voice on the voice mail recording. I thought she still had this other phone but wasn't quite sure. I knew she had it in the past. She is still using it. We will end 2009 in a very different state of being for sure. I am refusing to continue the allusion (to myself) that anything will get better. She re-newed her lease on her apartment and makes very little effort to have the kids at her place, especially if it is anyway inconvenient to her. I will do everything possible to enjoy the holidays with our kids. I will not bring up the subject with her at all. Our 5 kids are the best in the world and they keep me going. They are worth ..... who am I kidding....they are priceless.

May all who read this enjoy the Christmas holidays in all the warmest and loving ways.

MKD

ido · Dec 23, 2008

MyKidsDaddy said:
Just want to vent. It is Christmas...and I find out that my wife has a separate cell phone from her boyfriend. I called the number and got her voice on the voice mail recording. I thought she still had this other phone but wasn't quite sure. I knew she had it in the past. She is still using it. We will end 2009 in a very different state of being for sure. I am refusing to continue the allusion (to myself) that anything will get better. She re-newed her lease on her apartment and makes very little effort to have the kids at her place, especially if it is anyway inconvenient to her. I will do everything possible to enjoy the holidays with our kids. I will not bring up the subject with her at all. Our 5 kids are the best in the world and they keep me going. They are worth ..... who am I kidding....they are priceless.

May all who read this enjoy the Christmas holidays in all the warmest and loving ways.

MKD

It is my prayer that you and your children have a blessed Christmas together.

ido · Dec 30, 2008

What kind of parent buys their kids a Wii for Christmas, then tells them they're being bad and doesn't let them play it for the week that they're at that parents house...but lets their older brother play it?

libertybelle · Dec 30, 2008

dayknee said:
<groans>

So apparently estranged husband told our son that he was coming up yesterday. I did not know this. Then he calls our son and tells him he cant. This is not the first time. I wish he would make more time for his children. He only comes up once a week and my son misses him. So of course my son is upset and unhappy. Then my estranged husband wants to talk to me. I get on the phone and he starts yellng how no one understands him and how all I can do when I talk to him is say "ah ah..uh huh..yeah.."..right there..I hung up..I am SICK of being yelled at and berated for things that I cannot control. He calls back an hour later and wants to know why I hung up. I told him I am not going to be yelled at anymore and that I am NOT going ot be put inthe middle of his and his sons situation. I cannot do anything about the fact that you are once again, not coming. I cannot make the hurt better for my son either. I am just tired of him yelling at me when the kids get upset becasue he isnt coming up to see them. jflsdjfsdajf;j;sdafj;lsdajf;lsdja;lfjesa

Hi day it's been a while, that's if you even remember me. Anywho... I went through this with my children's dad. That's when the man was around. But here's some good news. The children are grown, 20 & 21. The girl is the 21 year old and even though good ole' dad visits he's learned not to bring up certain stuff like what a !*%@& I was. She reminds him he failed in his responsibilities. The boy however, he just sais it straight up. "You were not my dad. You weren't there, you left me sitting and waiting, and when you did come around you complained about how much money mom got! Now old man you can wait on me."

I don't always support my son's "freedom of expression", yet I know the man has it coming. Be patient my friend they grow up and figure things out.

Autumnleaf said:
Sometimes I wish my wife would cheat so I could go and not look back. They key is to quit on them or not. If you give up you move on. If you don't you don't.

For what its worth.

I thought this about my husband for a couple years now. However my committment to God always outweighed my committment to him. It's come down to accepting we have nothing in common anymore and only by letting the Lord take care of us individually will the Lord be able to help us.

The secular told us we wouldn't make it together and believe it or not a church we were attending told us the same thing.

FaithfulWife said:
Million Pieces- PM'ing ya I'm so sorry.

Here's my AARRGGHH for the day: my dear hubby's ex drives me INSANE--I'm BALD from how entitled this woman is!! She told our son she would get him tickets to a concert, so he saved and saved and saved so he'd have some money to spend. It was going to be the ex, dear hubby and her son, and our son. He was going to be at the concert so we made plans to go see dear hubby's mom for her birthday for dinner. NOW she hasn't bought the tickets and doesn't want to go and she's whining, "Why don't you give up the stupid dinner to take your son to this concert? I'll pay for your tickets".

THAT WOULD BE BECAUSE IT'S YOUR RESPONSIBILITY. You promised it--either follow through on your promise or YOU deal with the disappointment and anger! NOT me! Oh no! It is not my fault, I did not put you in this spot, and I am not covering for your complete failure as a parent and decent human being!

/argh

Thank you!

I understand this to read the exwife is involved in your marriage. I am understanding this to say that your husband still is involved with the exwife...so is the child yours and his? Or does the child belong to him and the ex?

My ex played this silly exwife game. And to me it is a silly game. They'd spend time "together" and all that happy hogwosh.... I couldn't even set boundaries for the woman. It was like I was married to him and her!

I'll never forget the first time I had enough and told her no... then told him to get over himself. Wow what a fight that was.

5kidsdad · Feb 17, 2009

OK, new ARRRGH...why do lawyers, that you pay good money for, have to be such a pain in the keester? I know I'm just a number, but come on, it is a very big deal to me and my kids. Maybe I'n just over reacting to it all, and just nervous about all the stuff going down, I don't know.

5kd

5kidsdad · Feb 28, 2009

This is a consistent ARRGH! with me, but how is it that I can't get shared custody of my kids, and she can pawn them off to her family an average of 15 to 22 nights per month? I don't understand howsomeone can take for granted having their children around them, when I just want them around as often as I can.

Autumnleaf · Mar 5, 2009

5kidsdad said:
This is a consistent ARRGH! with me, but how is it that I can't get shared custody of my kids, and she can pawn them off to her family an average of 15 to 22 nights per month? I don't understand howsomeone can take for granted having their children around them, when I just want them around as often as I can.

Welcome to the law. All lawyers are not the same. I learned that after my mother's 3rd divorce, the guy actually came out okay for a change.

cesty · Mar 23, 2009

Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthymeditate on these things. The things which you learned and received and heard and saw in me, these do, and the God of peace will be with you. (Philippians 4:8-9 NKJV)

Argh!

captiveheart

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ido

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FaithfulWife

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MyKidsDaddy

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5kidsdad

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Autumnleaf

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cesty

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