I still don’t know why angry thoughts still come into my mind. My psychiatrist said that usually when there are angry thoughts, that indicates that there is still some kind of hurt beneath there. I guess that would make sense. After all, anger is the natural response to a perceived wrong. People do things that we see as painful to us, and we become wounded, and in order to cover the wound, we produce anger. Anger is indicative of a need for healing, a need for love, a need to see the truth and to grow.
Much of my anger over the past years has had to do with women. I’m thankful to Divinity and its High Providence that I’ve been able to transcend those issues to a large part. I can’t really find the words to describe the conflicts I had. My question was and still is, “What is my place as a man?” I guess you could say that was one of the central themes in my life following my first relationship. Another question was, “What is love?” And another thing I wanted… power.
Yeah… As regards to women, some things I still just don’t know. I can tell there’s a difference between men and women… or is there really, aside from biology? Well, as it appears to me, there is. They seem, as a rule, emotional. I think the thing that makes me angry at times is more of an issue of trust. I don’t know. I guess it’s past experience. But I don’t like excessive emotionalism, especially when it’s directed at me. I’’ve learned I’mm vulnerable to it, in a way. And I don’t like flaky behavior.
Oh, well… these are old issues, and I have yet to find the right perspective on them. I’ve answered the main question anyway, not ultimately but for this stage. My place as a man is to be me, only me, uncompromisingly and with no regrets.
Much of my anger over the past years has had to do with women. I’m thankful to Divinity and its High Providence that I’ve been able to transcend those issues to a large part. I can’t really find the words to describe the conflicts I had. My question was and still is, “What is my place as a man?” I guess you could say that was one of the central themes in my life following my first relationship. Another question was, “What is love?” And another thing I wanted… power.
Yeah… As regards to women, some things I still just don’t know. I can tell there’s a difference between men and women… or is there really, aside from biology? Well, as it appears to me, there is. They seem, as a rule, emotional. I think the thing that makes me angry at times is more of an issue of trust. I don’t know. I guess it’s past experience. But I don’t like excessive emotionalism, especially when it’s directed at me. I’’ve learned I’mm vulnerable to it, in a way. And I don’t like flaky behavior.
Oh, well… these are old issues, and I have yet to find the right perspective on them. I’ve answered the main question anyway, not ultimately but for this stage. My place as a man is to be me, only me, uncompromisingly and with no regrets.