Well no way are they NPD ...those with full blooded NPD don't talk like that ( Maybe BPD might, because I think thats part\half NPD).
Those w NPD aren't good at noticing good things about other people unless the other is in a high position and or has a title. Aaand for sure they aren't even half way good at aplogizing or feeling guilty about possibly hurting someones feelings. I have not known them to aplogize because they cannot even entertain the thought in their mind that they may have done anything wrong (on a rare occasion "someone" can- but I should hope so if they're supposed to be Christian as well..even then it's the rare occasion).
On the other hand... was that also before I got something to them? hmm yea, they were as apologetic, just not as. So is this now because I've proved myself for real and not just talk? yea but in anycase they aren't "pure" ASPD either.
I think if someone who has ASPD thinks there's a good chance of getting something of value- they will make an effort to recieve it... some going more out of their way than others. Some are more active & agressive some more lazy, or maybe the same person up & down depending. In any case, I think if one was like that they would have no problem (since they didn't have someone to watch the little kids) having somone come and drop off something for them, even if their place wasn't perfect, or they would have no problem just standing out in the front take it and go in lol.
Like in the case before, for
And usually they aren't gracious about recieving stuff either ( I suppose unless they had some NPD tendencies in them & were very conning). Once they think they have you pegged as a "source" or possible source you will hear more from them more often.
ROFL yes it's true I too jumped when this stranger made an offer to me. But it wasn't becuase of the practical aspect of it. In fact I wasn't even sure if I'd take them up on the offer because of practical techincal reasons. But, it to me was a sign or kindness, openess, and interest in others...
Now as I've seen I think other signs back that up.
Yes I would think I still have the good original remnants that God created in me- to be used for good. So yes I still consider myself an opportunist- but not covetous, or materialistic.
So after our talk yesterday. It came into my head the whole subject and the question if I ever try to "buy people off". If one might think I try to "buy" friends or relatioinships.
Obviously I had friends for which that wasn't the case. OK then there are others for which one might wonder, friends\ministry.
Well... one I did put a lot into it that way (for us) ah but this person has on their side they are a "fair & just" kind of person. Over the years they got me\ us gifts back, had us over for stuff. So it wasn't like that.
There's someone maybe that was part in there. This meaning, I don't mind using resources to open a door- for the purpose of gospel or leading someone closer to Jesus. I know, one can't "buy" someone into receiving Christ. Yet it can open the door in many ways- to show people you are for real like you aren't just talk about caring for people. It's good to meet needs, to show God is moving and sometimes he works through people, not like dropping things from the sky. In doing so, sometimes we show we put God first and money doesn't have a grip on us- show God's priorities.
And then there is the mindset (evangelist like) that you "do what you gotta do" to reach a soul. So if that includes, taking someone out to dinner, paying for their ticket, buying a gift to show care, when they get into need helping them out if you can or just contributing to that help. These might not instantly turn them to Christ but it's part of the plan\path. It's also can be part of just representing Jesus- God gives, God helps, God provides for needs.
So like I don't try to buy people into liking me. It's so not about that, I try not to even think about that, whether someone likes me or not. The thing is, is this relationship productive one way or another... is someone (me them or someone else) being lead to or made closer to God...through whatever. Like a great pastor used to say there's "10,000,000 people in the area"- so many people one could know, could like or like you (of course not all but if even a chunk of that) soo who then, why? - For God's kingdom.
Esp. if one is adult and time seems even more sparse, people have to make choices- including me. Wow and even more if you have kids. Like this song I've had in rotation- "Waay beyond myself".
So it's not just about some emotional high, it's not to look good or appear a certain way, it's not to have lots of people like you and even up with a big friends list, and not about more opportunities to get, not even about more opportuniies to give- just for the sake of it or just the sake of being "nice".
Those w NPD aren't good at noticing good things about other people unless the other is in a high position and or has a title. Aaand for sure they aren't even half way good at aplogizing or feeling guilty about possibly hurting someones feelings. I have not known them to aplogize because they cannot even entertain the thought in their mind that they may have done anything wrong (on a rare occasion "someone" can- but I should hope so if they're supposed to be Christian as well..even then it's the rare occasion).
On the other hand... was that also before I got something to them? hmm yea, they were as apologetic, just not as. So is this now because I've proved myself for real and not just talk? yea but in anycase they aren't "pure" ASPD either.
I think if someone who has ASPD thinks there's a good chance of getting something of value- they will make an effort to recieve it... some going more out of their way than others. Some are more active & agressive some more lazy, or maybe the same person up & down depending. In any case, I think if one was like that they would have no problem (since they didn't have someone to watch the little kids) having somone come and drop off something for them, even if their place wasn't perfect, or they would have no problem just standing out in the front take it and go in lol.
Like in the case before, for
And usually they aren't gracious about recieving stuff either ( I suppose unless they had some NPD tendencies in them & were very conning). Once they think they have you pegged as a "source" or possible source you will hear more from them more often.
ROFL yes it's true I too jumped when this stranger made an offer to me. But it wasn't becuase of the practical aspect of it. In fact I wasn't even sure if I'd take them up on the offer because of practical techincal reasons. But, it to me was a sign or kindness, openess, and interest in others...
Now as I've seen I think other signs back that up.
Yes I would think I still have the good original remnants that God created in me- to be used for good. So yes I still consider myself an opportunist- but not covetous, or materialistic.
So after our talk yesterday. It came into my head the whole subject and the question if I ever try to "buy people off". If one might think I try to "buy" friends or relatioinships.
Obviously I had friends for which that wasn't the case. OK then there are others for which one might wonder, friends\ministry.
Well... one I did put a lot into it that way (for us) ah but this person has on their side they are a "fair & just" kind of person. Over the years they got me\ us gifts back, had us over for stuff. So it wasn't like that.
There's someone maybe that was part in there. This meaning, I don't mind using resources to open a door- for the purpose of gospel or leading someone closer to Jesus. I know, one can't "buy" someone into receiving Christ. Yet it can open the door in many ways- to show people you are for real like you aren't just talk about caring for people. It's good to meet needs, to show God is moving and sometimes he works through people, not like dropping things from the sky. In doing so, sometimes we show we put God first and money doesn't have a grip on us- show God's priorities.
And then there is the mindset (evangelist like) that you "do what you gotta do" to reach a soul. So if that includes, taking someone out to dinner, paying for their ticket, buying a gift to show care, when they get into need helping them out if you can or just contributing to that help. These might not instantly turn them to Christ but it's part of the plan\path. It's also can be part of just representing Jesus- God gives, God helps, God provides for needs.
So like I don't try to buy people into liking me. It's so not about that, I try not to even think about that, whether someone likes me or not. The thing is, is this relationship productive one way or another... is someone (me them or someone else) being lead to or made closer to God...through whatever. Like a great pastor used to say there's "10,000,000 people in the area"- so many people one could know, could like or like you (of course not all but if even a chunk of that) soo who then, why? - For God's kingdom.
Esp. if one is adult and time seems even more sparse, people have to make choices- including me. Wow and even more if you have kids. Like this song I've had in rotation- "Waay beyond myself".
So it's not just about some emotional high, it's not to look good or appear a certain way, it's not to have lots of people like you and even up with a big friends list, and not about more opportunities to get, not even about more opportuniies to give- just for the sake of it or just the sake of being "nice".