dysfunctional thinking...

Day 2 of sticking to my guns- no stupid movies...

Is ADD bothering me? Have a hard time focusing on what I should do, therefore blah.
I know I have stuff that should be done, but can't focus on where to start.
That's why I'm pretty good in a crisis (in urgent mode) it helps me to focus. Not only focus but hyper focus.

It's like if there's nothing urgent, I have a hard time deciding what to do. Then if that goes on too long I get frustrated, and if that goes on I get angry (basically at myself but then I could take that out on others by being snappy\irritable).

On a side note, think more confirmation. I've read and think I've observed OCD & DP can go along with HPD. Think that have been me too, before. More so with the DP than the OCD but but I did I have a bit of it I think.

I remember a bunch of goofy things. First comes to mind: Like, I was often late for whatever because I felt I couldn't go out till I thought my shoes were perfectly shined or something like that. I used to be scared to get off the train right away, if I passed my stop, or if I went up the wrong stairs and then have to go back up around the other way- because I didn't want anyone to notice the mistake I made and think how stupid I was (later realizing after I got saved- most people could care less, and the few who might- who cares, who are they to me?)