Why do people have sex (apart from for reproduction)?

[RoseOfJesus]

I'll be honest and say I've never had sex so I can't really know, but I can't imagine it bringing any closeness or physical sensation that a hug or just laying in each other's arms can't bring. Why that weird act? Is it really that good or is it just for heat? Cause hugs can bring heat, too.

 

[DCJazz]

...Some people even get addicted to it. It stimulates the pleasure centers of the brain and releases, um... seratonin I think is how it's spelled. And this society glorifies sex so much it's hard not to find people engaging in the activity for 'fun'.

 

[Losingmyfaith]

It can be a great deal of fun. It is completely natural to seek out pleasure and sex can be very stimulating. I hope that helps.

 

[Grumpy Old Man]

...Some people even get addicted to it. It stimulates the pleasure centers of the brain and releases, um... seratonin I think is how it's spelled. And this society glorifies sex so much it's hard not to find people engaging in the activity for 'fun'.

There are very few societies that haven't glorified sex. It's only when Christianity and Islam came along that people started preaching against it. Humanity has little else to amuse itself with, yet for some reason religion thinks that seeking pleasure for the sake of pleasure is evil; even when that pleasure involves nothing more than two consenting adults (of whatever gender) making love. For whatever reason we cannot fathom, the ascetics within religion would have us believe that God does not want us to have any form of pleasure, especially sexual pleasure.

Christianity really ruined relationships with the opposite sex for me. I tried to be ascetic, as Jesus and Paul proscribed, and my fundie church Pastors taught, but all I got out of religion was guilt and shame for being a human, and feeling human urges. The biggest thing I regret about my former Christianity is that I denied myself several attempts at a loving relationship with women simply because I felt guilty about it. My youth was wasted on Jesus, and now I'm older I'm a bit "stuck on the shelf". Ironically, I seem to have embraced the asceticism in my middle years that I struggled so hard to attain in my younger years.

 

[CounselorForChrist]

Sex is beyond anything like a hug or kiss. Its hard to explain until you have it (married of course). Its a deeply connecting bond that goes beyond pleasure. I always assumed it was just a pleasure sensation until I had it. Theres ALOT more to it then that.

 

[GrowingSmaller]

There are a lot of meanings and motives for the sex act across cultures. For instance in Tantraism it might be searching for enlightenment, in Kabbalah becoming closer to the Shekinah.

 

[The Nihilist]

...Some people even get addicted to it. It stimulates the pleasure centers of the brain and releases, um... seratonin I think is how it's spelled. And this society glorifies sex so much it's hard not to find people engaging in the activity for 'fun'.

Don't worry, bud. You'll find someone special some day.

 

[The Nihilist]

I'll be honest and say I've never had sex so I can't really know, but I can't imagine it bringing any closeness or physical sensation that a hug or just laying in each other's arms can't bring. Why that weird act? Is it really that good or is it just for heat? Cause hugs can bring heat, too.

Well, as my neuroscience major girlfriend explained to me, intercourse released oxytocin, which facilitates pair bonding (this is sciencey talk for brings you closer together). If you feel like reading, here's the wikipedia article:
Oxytocin - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

 

[Humble Pie]

The biggest thing I regret about my former Christianity is that I denied myself several attempts at a loving relationship with women simply because I felt guilty about it.

I think it's called throwing the baby out with the bath water? You've still got time to find someone special though.

 

[Jade Margery]

I'll be honest and say I've never had sex so I can't really know, but I can't imagine it bringing any closeness or physical sensation that a hug or just laying in each other's arms can't bring. Why that weird act? Is it really that good or is it just for heat? Cause hugs can bring heat, too.

Well for starters, it feels really, really good. If you can find a good, considerate partner, it can be mind blowing. Literally, you can end up just lying there for like an hour thinking 'Damn that was good'. Sure, you can get [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse] with masturbation and it's a lot less trouble, but it's like going to an awesome movie--way more fun if you're with someone else. I actually can't think of anything that compares on a pleasure level. Trust me, there are a lot more physical sensations to explore than hugging.

Granted, most of that depends on the person you're with. As one sex advice columnist so adequately put it, the best partners are GGG--Good, Giving, and Game. If you don't have a good partner who makes an effort to make it a good experience for you, sex is just a lot of sweaty humping and not particularly fun.

As for closeness and feeling connected, well, it doesn't get much closer than being inside someone. It's not something that can easily be described but yes, sex will make you feel closer to someone you love than a hug will. It's more intense. Besides that, science has proven that sex releases chemicals that cause you to feel even more strongly for the person you're having it with. Love is all chemical, not that that makes it less real!

On the health side, [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse] are actually good for you. Women who regularly have [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse] tend to be healthier, both mentally and physically, than those who don't. (I don't know if it's the same for men, but I would assume so.) Part of that is that it's just a great stress reliever.

It sounds a bit like you've not only not had sex, maybe you've never masturbated. In which case I heartily suggest giving it a try. Not only will you burn off stress, you'll be ready when you eventually do get a partner to tell them what kind of things you like, what feels good. Good sex depends a lot on communication and knowing your own body. It ain't like the movies, where the love interests get it right on the first try, warm light effects and moving sheets and tadah! Happy people in a tangle. Nope. First time you have sex with anyone is probably going to be an awkward series of trial and error. That's kind of what makes it fun though.

 

[GrowingSmaller]

Dopamine.

 

[fenix144]

Feels good. I'd say number 1 reason.

 

[quatona]

I'll be honest and say I've never had sex so I can't really know, but I can't imagine it bringing any closeness or physical sensation that a hug or just laying in each other's arms can't bring.

I suggest that if you want to know you may want to check it out for yourself.
Personally, I think that sex tends to be overrated - but then again it is in no way comparable to a hug or laying in each other´s arms. It adds a totally different complexion to closeness etc.
Again: check it out for yourself when the time has come.
Can´t promise you anything, and maybe it turns out to be not your kind of thing. Chances are, though, that you´ll experience something that´s beyond your previous experiences.

 

[Volokh]

it feel good

 

[Wayte]

Look at it biologically. As a species on Earth, our one biological goal is to reproduce. That's it, as far as the earth is concerned, if you do nothing else, you've still done your job. As such, it's one of our deepest instincts. It feels great when you satiate it, and feels terrible when you deprive it.

 

[technofox]

I'll be honest and say I've never had sex so I can't really know, but I can't imagine it bringing any closeness or physical sensation that a hug or just laying in each other's arms can't bring. Why that weird act? Is it really that good or is it just for heat? Cause hugs can bring heat, too.

Wow...

Its been so long since I have been in your shoes that I have forgotten what it is like. Well sex is extremely pleasurable, particularly when you are in love with your partner (preferably in marriage with your wife). Not only is it pleasurable, but it is also very intimate, for a guy you would be inside the woman and become as I love how poetically God puts it - one flesh. You become truly part of that person for that moment of time, full of kissing and caressing, and well much more than I could probably say here on CF. The point is that sex bring pleasure and builds physical and emotional (and sometime spiritual) intimacy between two lovers (particularly between a man and a woman).

Sex is not something that can described, because its sensations and intimacy is an experience that cannot begin to be explained in words. The act itself maybe, but no the actual feelings that one gets during sex. Sex helps build the bonding of a relationship, it is also the barometer as to the health of the relationship (e.g. a lot of sex = good/great relationship, little to no sex = problems).

I hope this helps.

 

[apache1]

There are a lot of meanings and motives for the sex act across cultures. For instance in Tantraism it might be searching for enlightenment, in Kabbalah becoming closer to the Shekinah.

Something more base and primal .... [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse] feel damn good. No far-fetched esoteric philosophy required!

 

[RoseOfJesus]

Well for starters, it feels really, really good. If you can find a good, considerate partner, it can be mind blowing. Literally, you can end up just lying there for like an hour thinking 'Damn that was good'. Sure, you can get [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse] with masturbation and it's a lot less trouble, but it's like going to an awesome movie--way more fun if you're with someone else. I actually can't think of anything that compares on a pleasure level. Trust me, there are a lot more physical sensations to explore than hugging.

Granted, most of that depends on the person you're with. As one sex advice columnist so adequately put it, the best partners are GGG--Good, Giving, and Game. If you don't have a good partner who makes an effort to make it a good experience for you, sex is just a lot of sweaty humping and not particularly fun.

As for closeness and feeling connected, well, it doesn't get much closer than being inside someone. It's not something that can easily be described but yes, sex will make you feel closer to someone you love than a hug will. It's more intense. Besides that, science has proven that sex releases chemicals that cause you to feel even more strongly for the person you're having it with. Love is all chemical, not that that makes it less real!

On the health side, [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse] are actually good for you. Women who regularly have [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse] tend to be healthier, both mentally and physically, than those who don't. (I don't know if it's the same for men, but I would assume so.) Part of that is that it's just a great stress reliever.

It sounds a bit like you've not only not had sex, maybe you've never masturbated. In which case I heartily suggest giving it a try. Not only will you burn off stress, you'll be ready when you eventually do get a partner to tell them what kind of things you like, what feels good. Good sex depends a lot on communication and knowing your own body. It ain't like the movies, where the love interests get it right on the first try, warm light effects and moving sheets and tadah! Happy people in a tangle. Nope. First time you have sex with anyone is probably going to be an awkward series of trial and error. That's kind of what makes it fun though.

Thanks for yet another great reply, and thanks to the rest of you too.

No I have not done any of the things you mentioned But I guess I can't judge it until I have. Your replies clear up a lot.

 

[GrowingSmaller]

Something more base and primal .... [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse] feel damn good. No far-fetched esoteric philosophy required!

lol

 

[Jade Margery]

Something more base and primal .... [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse] feel damn good. No far-fetched esoteric philosophy required!

You may as well ask, 'Why do people eat bacon (apart from protein?)'