Should the disabled get married?

[Aspireman]

Probably been asked before. I think I have on another forum. Just thought I'd ask the general public. I suffer from severe depression, anxiety and vertigo. I also have struggles with lust. Most believe that you have to provide for your wife, which I agree if you're mentally and physically able too. I am not. My therapist believes I should seek out a wife. #1 It's hard for me to even get out of the house some days. #2 I only work 4 hours a week and am not able to support myself. #3 I have not yet been able to get health insurance or disability. Is there any woman out there that would look beyond these disabilities? I'm not a perfect person, I'm a sinner saved by Grace. I would help out my wife as much as I could. Any thoughts?

 

[Boidae]

My wife is disabled. She has multiple sclerosis, plus depression and sometimes vision issues due to her multiple sclerosis.

For the almost 4 years that i have know her, I have worked maybe one year of that, in two different jobs. Neither of which lasted for me. A few months after the birth of our daughter my wife received a clear message from God that I am home for a reason. She was able to realize that my experiences in life, my training as an EMT and my desire to remain home to take care of her and our daughter is what God has called me to do. She does work, one day a week, but for only a couple hours. She does this just so that she can feel as though she is being productive.

Provision from the husband come in different ways and isn't always monetary in nature. I do around our apartment what my wife isn't capable of doing, which is nearly everything. Pretty soon my wife will not be able to pick-up our daughter. This will probably happen before my daughter starts to walk, and even then she will still need to be picked up throughout the day. I am home and can do that for her. I am my wife's medical advocate, her taxi at times, the cook and i care for our pets.

The above is how I provide for our family and I realize that it may go against the traditional Baptist view, but my wife and I know for sure that this is my calling.

With that said, I am still trying to bring in a little income, mainly to pay my child support so that my wife doesn't have to provide me that. I have started a small dog walking/sitting side job. It's just starting out.

 

[savedfromdistruction]

Probably been asked before. I think I have on another forum. Just thought I'd ask the general public. I suffer from severe depression, anxiety and vertigo. I also have struggles with lust. Most believe that you have to provide for your wife, which I agree if you're mentally and physically able too. I am not. My therapist believes I should seek out a wife. #1 It's hard for me to even get out of the house some days. #2 I only work 4 hours a week and am not able to support myself. #3 I have not yet been able to get health insurance or disability. Is there any woman out there that would look beyond these disabilities? I'm not a perfect person, I'm a sinner saved by Grace. I would help out my wife as much as I could. Any thoughts?

You are free to marry in the Lord. I would suggest that you not marry for a meal ticket or a nurse. Marry with the understanding you are going to be the head as scripture calls for leading her in all righteousness.

 

[Aspireman]

My wife is disabled. She has multiple sclerosis, plus depression and sometimes vision issues due to her multiple sclerosis.

For the almost 4 years that i have know her, I have worked maybe one year of that, in two different jobs. Neither of which lasted for me. A few months after the birth of our daughter my wife received a clear message from God that I am home for a reason. She was able to realize that my experiences in life, my training as an EMT and my desire to remain home to take care of her and our daughter is what God has called me to do. She does work, one day a week, but for only a couple hours. She does this just so that she can feel as though she is being productive.

Provision from the husband come in different ways and isn't always monetary in nature. I do around our apartment what my wife isn't capable of doing, which is nearly everything. Pretty soon my wife will not be able to pick-up our daughter. This will probably happen before my daughter starts to walk, and even then she will still need to be picked up throughout the day. I am home and can do that for her. I am my wife's medical advocate, her taxi at times, the cook and i care for our pets.

The above is how I provide for our family and I realize that it may go against the traditional Baptist view, but my wife and I know for sure that this is my calling.

With that said, I am still trying to bring in a little income, mainly to pay my child support so that my wife doesn't have to provide me that. I have started a small dog walking/sitting side job. It's just starting out.

Stupid question, but did your wife have these disabilities when you first met, or was she really bad off? I'm thankful that God has put men like you out there, to look past the disability and the worldly views.

 

[Aspireman]

You are free to marry in the Lord. I would suggest that you not marry for a meal ticket or a nurse. Marry with the understanding you are going to be the head as scripture calls for leading her in all righteousness.

If you can't be that "Head" in some ways is that wrong? Don't people with disabilities have a right despite the fact that they're disabled to be married? I would be there for her and help her out as much as I can.

 

[Boidae]

Stupid question, but did your wife have these disabilities when you first met, or was she really bad off? I'm thankful that God has put men like you out there, to look past the disability and the worldly views.

My wife wasn't this bad when we first met, no, but I did know what I was getting into when I started dating her. She even did her best to persuade me not to have an interest in her beyond friendship by telling me all the negative things about her, it only made her that much more beautiful in my eyes.

We met in May 2009 and were married January 2010. She is the one who brought me to Christ. Not that I was a horrible person and she has said to me before that one in a million as far as not ever trying drugs, having never been drunk, or tried cigarettes. That's not to say that I am perfect, but that it's strange when you consider that I didn't come from a Christian background.

My wife and I believe in an egalitarian marriage, where both spouses lead their families in the areas where they are more experienced and knowledgeable. Neither has the final say in a matter and if we do not come into agreement, we don't move forward with the matter. We feel that if we cannot come into an agreement, then the matter is just not worth it.

It has served us well in the three years that we have been married.

 

[C-Man]

Definitely get married if God calls you to it, and you love each other. My girlfriend has severe scoliosis, and she's a little slow, but she's the kindest and gentlest person I've ever met. I've got Asperger's Syndrome, and apparently a pinched nerve that causes me a lot of pain and numbness. It's kept me out of work for a few months now. It's possible that we may both end up in wheelchairs. But we plan to get married someday, when I'm back on my feet.

 

[Alyssum]

Joni Eareckson Tada is a quadraplegic who is enjoying a loving, mutually fulfilling marriage to Ken Tada. They are a beautiful example of marriage.

https://www.joniandfriends.org/donate/?appeal=WEBC13A

 

[desmalia]

My wife is disabled. She has multiple sclerosis, plus depression and sometimes vision issues due to her multiple sclerosis.

I'm sorry to hear about your wife. I have MS, too. If she ever needs someone to talk about it with, please let her know I'm happy to! I've found it tremendously helpful to discuss with friends I've made online who are struggling with the same issues.

You are free to marry in the Lord. I would suggest that you not marry for a meal ticket or a nurse. Marry with the understanding you are going to be the head as scripture calls for leading her in all righteousness.

This is sound advice.