Sex After Marriage/Masturbation

[Rion]

Sex inside marriage, not for procreation but to draw you two closer, would not be sinful, I think. After all, Paul writes that abstaining for a time is a wonderful thing, but to then return to one another so you're not tempted. It doesn't sound like he's worried about it producing children, but keeping the two together as one.

 

[Floatingaxe]

Ok perhaps I should explain more. A bad parent may become an ok parent with God's help. Just as a good parent might become a great one. But taking a horrible parent *like I would be lol* you might get some improvement but God isn;t going to make most really bad parents into really good parents unless maybe he is desperate for them to be parents. And I donlt see why God would be desperate soo...

Well to put things in a better, more positive light:

God is in the business of making us into His people--people OF EXCELLENCE! You are limiting God's power to change us. You can't do that. God doesn't think like you. He has His own thoughts. His thoughts are higher than ours.

Isaiah 55:9
For just as the heavens are higher than the earth,
so my ways are higher than your ways
and my thoughts higher than your thoughts.

 

[Digit]

Because not everyone has the desire to be a parent.

I know several people like that. Its not that uncommon. My goodness.

I don't think we can really use our desire as a reason to do/not to do something. Scripture calls us to do a great deal we often don't desire, hence why I tend to turn to scripture for a recond of what we should and shouldn't do, afterall it's there for exactly that reason.

Whether we like to do something or not, has no bearing on what God calls us to do.

Cheers,
Digit

 

[Jerrell]

It is really not an issue as to why a husband and wife have sex, if they want to have sex they can have sex. The intention doesn't have to be pro-creation, although pro-creation is what nature motivates sex for.

 

[Trashionista]

I don't think we can really use our desire as a reason to do/not to do something. Scripture calls us to do a great deal we often don't desire, hence why I tend to turn to scripture for a recond of what we should and shouldn't do, afterall it's there for exactly that reason.

Whether we like to do something or not, has no bearing on what God calls us to do.

Cheers,
Digit

I'm sorry. But if you don't really, really, really want to have kids - make an effort not to have them. "Be fruitful & mulitply" is fine - if you again, have a strong instinct to have children.

Having kids is a huge comittment, and I can't see choosing to have them [as it is a choice], if you don't want to have them. Its not about being not open to children; but if you really don't want to mother [or father] children for that matter, than the onus should be on that person to make sure they don't procreate.

This is all said from someone without kids. So take it for what its worth.

 

[Calliso]

I'm sorry. But if you don't really, really, really want to have kids - make an effort not to have them. "Be fruitful & mulitply" is fine - if you again, have a strong instinct to have children.

Having kids is a huge comittment, and I can't see choosing to have them [as it is a choice], if you don't want to have them. Its not about being not open to children; but if you really don't want to mother [or father] children for that matter, than the onus should be on that person to make sure they don't procreate.

This is all said from someone without kids. So take it for what its worth.

Exactly how I feel as well.

 

[Calliso]

Well to put things in a better, more positive light:

God is in the business of making us into His people--people OF EXCELLENCE! You are limiting God's power to change us. You can't do that. God doesn't think like you. He has His own thoughts. His thoughts are higher than ours.

Isaiah 55:9
For just as the heavens are higher than the earth,
so my ways are higher than your ways
and my thoughts higher than your thoughts.

I don;t think he can;t do make people good parents or what not or that he can;t do anyting he wishes. I just donlt believe he necessarily will unless he has a really good reason too,.

 

[Digit]

I'm sorry. But if you don't really, really, really want to have kids - make an effort not to have them. "Be fruitful & mulitply" is fine - if you again, have a strong instinct to have children.

Having kids is a huge comittment, and I can't see choosing to have them [as it is a choice], if you don't want to have them. Its not about being not open to children; but if you really don't want to mother [or father] children for that matter, than the onus should be on that person to make sure they don't procreate.

This is all said from someone without kids. So take it for what its worth.

I was talking specifically about our willingness/like to do something, being a deciding factor in if we should do it.

Digit

 

[Floatingaxe]

I don;t think he can;t do make people good parents or what not or that he can;t do anyting he wishes. I just donlt believe he necessarily will unless he has a really good reason too,.

What possible reason would God have for not helping Christian parents be the parents He wants for the children that He holds precious????

Sheesh.

 

[Calliso]

What possible reason would God have for not helping Christian parents be the parents He wants for the children that He holds precious????

Sheesh.

Not everyone is meant to be a parent christian married or not. Not saying he wonlt help at all.. but God just doesn;t perform miracles because we want him too. So if he wants me to become a parent perhaps he will put that desire in me..and my husband as well and change some circumstances in our life while he is at it...ahah.

 

[ScottUnitarian]

Can we assume then that you never watch a TV show you enjoy? That would be just for pleasure and therefore sinful, according to you. The same would apply to the eating of, say, a hot fudge sundae, or whatever flavor you liked. I took a drive in the mountains the other day, just to enjoy the cooler air and beautiful scenery... a sinful activity, no doubt.

I think these are apples and oranges. Indulging in lust unwisely can lead to serious problems between people, as well as for the individual subject.

 

[dayhiker]

I think these are apples and oranges. Indulging in lust unwisely can lead to serious problems between people, as well as for the individual subject.

No, I don't think its apples and oranges .. I've read about a lot of spouces, both male and female, who complain about their spouce being a couch potato. Classic examples are: guys come home from work and watch TV and do nothing around the house. Or guys come home from work and the wife has watched TV all day and not looked after the house (its a mess). Plus a number of others senerios.

These people are hurting as well by the way their spouce is treating them.
dayhiker

 

[DarkNLovely]

I do not know if it has been asked yet as there are over 40 pages and I have not read them all but here it goes?

If sex for pleasure is wrong, then why do women have clitorioses?
If masturbation is wrong, why do men have wet dreams?

I hope this is the right terminology to use as the only alternative words I know for these things would definatly be inappropriate! So if I have said anything to offend, please forgive me?

 

[EternallyPierced]

I do not know if it has been asked yet as there are over 40 pages and I have not read them all but here it goes?

If sex for pleasure is wrong, then why do women have clitorioses?
If masturbation is wrong, why do men have wet dreams?

I hope this is the right terminology to use as the only alternative words I know for these things would definatly be inappropriate! So if I have said anything to offend, please forgive me?

Sex for pleasure is not wrong. God made sex to be a wonderful thing and an enjoyable thing, it's society that has perverted it. God also commanded that sex was to be exclusive to a married relationship. So sex outside of the realm of marriage for any reason is wrong. The pleasure in itself is not wrong, it's the circumstances in which you receive the pleasure that counts.

As far as touching yourself goes I believe not masterbating is about self-control and honoring your temple (your body). I don't why we have wet dreams. I do know I never started having them until I stopped masterbating. I also know that when I have wet dreams that they're not always pleasureable. Sometimes it just happens and I don't know that it happened until the next morning. So comparing touching yourself and wet dreams is comparing apples to oranges. A voluntary act cannot be justified by an involuntary action. You choose to touch, you do not choose to have a wet dream. So therefore you can't say that just because we have wet dreams (that we may or may not receive pleasure from it) that it's ok to touch.

 

[DarkNLovely]

Sex for pleasure is not wrong. God made sex to be a wonderful thing and an enjoyable thing, it's society that has perverted it. God also commanded that sex was to be exclusive to a married relationship. So sex outside of the realm of marriage for any reason is wrong. The pleasure in itself is not wrong, it's the circumstances in which you receive the pleasure that counts.

As far as touching yourself goes I believe not masterbating is about self-control and honoring your temple (your body). I don't why we have wet dreams. I do know I never started having them until I stopped masterbating. I also know that when I have wet dreams that they're not always pleasureable. Sometimes it just happens and I don't know that it happened until the next morning. So comparing touching yourself and wet dreams is comparing apples to oranges. A voluntary act cannot be justified by an involuntary action. You choose to touch, you do not choose to have a wet dream. So therefore you can't say that just because we have wet dreams (that we may or may not receive pleasure from it) that it's ok to touch.

Thatnks!

Oh! I meant the wole "spilling seed" thing, but thanks!

 

[dayhiker]

I personally believe that masturbation and wet dreams are equivalant. The Wet dreams I had when I quite masturbating were so disturbing to me that I'd rather touch any day that have a wet dream.

The reason we have wet dreams is because the glan that holds the sperm gets full. Some of the sperm comes out in urine, some leaks out over time and if the build up is enough we have a wet dream.

When this glan if full its acts to highten our interest in sex. This is why we get more erections after 2 to 3 days of not having an [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse]. This also promtps the mind to have sexual dreams that lead to [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse]. Similar to a full badder in the morning.

So I see masturbation as emptind the glan that holds the sperm. This lowers the sexual tention and helps a man have self-control.

dayhiker

 

[Floatingaxe]

I personally believe that masturbation and wet dreams are equivalant. The Wet dreams I had when I quite masturbating were so disturbing to me that I'd rather touch any day that have a wet dream.

The reason we have wet dreams is because the glan that holds the sperm gets full. Some of the sperm comes out in urine, some leaks out over time and if the build up is enough we have a wet dream.

When this glan if full its acts to highten our interest in sex. This is why we get more erections after 2 to 3 days of not having an [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse]. This also promtps the mind to have sexual dreams that lead to [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse]. Similar to a full badder in the morning.

So I see masturbation as emptind the glan that holds the sperm. This lowers the sexual tention and helps a man have self-control.

dayhiker

Masturbation is taking the normal function of the "wet dream" into one's own hands, so to speak--making a normal function an unnatural one, involving the imagination and the sexual drive engages. Not natural, and not designed by God.

 

[DarkNLovely]

Masturbation is taking the normal function of the "wet dream" into one's own hands, <!

 

[david_x]

That's a lie, plain and simple. You said eating a single cookie for pleasure, is sin. You said that because our desire and intent was pleasure, not nutrition.

Period. Don't backtrack now and try to change your story.

Digit

I haven't changed anything, just clearing it up.

 

[david_x]

Here's a quote for y'all

Maturbation is sex with someone you trully love.